Man, I have to say... this song is *really* good, especially for a first attempt at mixing. Oh, by the way, I'm listening to the version with the new drums you put in - I think they sound fine! Don't change 'em!
I think the song has a kind of Mr. Bungle feel (their more laid back songs)... lots of change ups, some synth-sounding instruments (that's not a bad thing in this case), and those vocals.... you've got a really expressive vocal style, and I think that's one of the main highlights of the song.
Kudos!!
-som