Just a few thoughts.
I don't frequent this section of the forum because it takes forever to download mp3s on a 56k modem, and if I stream the song, it's not like I'm going to hear it well enough to give a quality critique...
I downloaded this one though, because I found the discussion to be really interesting.
Take all this for what it's worth. I'm not exactly an authority on anything.
One. PLEASE get a different mp3 encoder. It sounds like you may have used Blade-128kbps, and Blade is a terrible encoder for mp3.com mp3s. Blade is really only good for archival. It attempts to reproduce highs accurately, which adds a lot of artifacts at any bitrate under 320kbps. At 320 though, it has a beautiful transparent sound that's head and shoulders above any mp3 encoder.
For low bitrates such as 128kbps, I highly recommend LAME. It's free, and it's what I use when encoding at 128, 192, or VAR kbps. If you encode an mp3 at 128kbps and you still don't like the way it sounds, try adding a lowpass filter at 20khz or even 18hkz.
I don't necessarily like to criticise songs that aren't what I would normally listen to anyway. But for what it's worth, the thing this song's missing is a hook, in my opinion. If you're going to do a heartland-American-torch-power-ballad-flagwaving-song-type-thing, you need a chorus that makes people want to sway, shout, pump their fists, or whatever it is that they do.
Who could ever forget:
"BOOOOOOOOOOOORN in the USA!!!!"
"Ain't that America, home of the FREEEEEEEEEE, yeah..."
Do you like baseball? If you can capture the lump I felt in my throat every time I heard "God Bless America" performed during this year's World Series, THEN you've got a patriotic rocker to die for. But you're not there yet.
I would try conveying the emotion of your subject through your music or lyrics, rather than in your voice. It isn't that you don't have a good voice, but I feel that you're over singing, trying just a bit too hard to sell the song. Let the song sell itself.
Speaking of "sell", don't let anyone criticise you for wanting fame and fortune, or at least notoriety and comfort. As artists, we want to express ourselves. But we also want to be loved, and there is NOTHING wrong with that. It isn't selling out if you try to prod people into listening to your song, and it isn't selling out if you one day land that big deal.
I would replace those brasses with ANYTHING. If you have a Creative card, get a good brass soundfont. Or try to get a few brass players. Heck, if I lived anywhere near you, I'd do it for free. The brass part you wrote is very easy. If you tried, you wouldn't have any trouble getting a few high schoolers to record that part for $25 each. And don't be afraid to go with high schoolers. You'd be surprised how professionally some kids can play. Maybe it just sticks out to me because I do play band and orchestra instruments, but I think that brass lick sticks out like a sore thumb. I wouldn't just remove it though, because it's one of the song's more interesting components. It was one of the few parts of the song that I felt I hadn't heard elsewhere.
One other thing. I may be a sinner preaching to the converted here, because I know I'm also very guilty of this - but if I were you - ... hang on.
You may not even really do this normally. I know you were getting defensive due to some sharp criticism.
But my advice, is to not release any song to the public that you have to put a disclaimer on. Don't say "x, y, and z suck, but this is a demo. Pay more attention to a, b, and c." Because that won't inspire ANYONE to listen to your song. Some people in your audience will even find it insulting that you chose to unleash something upon them, that even you weren't fully satisfied with. Instead, you work your butt off at making x, y, and z sound as good as you can possibly make them sound. So what if it takes a few more weeks of work? THEN, when you release your song, go ahead and act like it's the best thing ever. More people will want to check it out. So what if x, y, and z still suck? YOU did the best that you could.
Two personal examples:
I recently decided to reopen my mp3.com page for the instrumental music that I sometimes like to write. One song in particular received quite a few compliments on its tonal quality, and somebody wanted to know where I got the instruments that I used. The truth was, about half of the instruments were default tones in my Sound Blaster. I just worked bloody hard to get them to sound decent!
Another one. I've been working since early March on my debut EP. That's about eight months, and I'm probably still at least half a year away from finishing it. And that's just a four song EP from a guy that nobody's ever heard of. I know that very few people are going to hear it, because very few people know or care that I exist. But I'm working my butt off anyway. Why? Because I want the people who DO hear it to be blown away, rather than feeling insulted that I had the nerve to ask for money for a demo.
Instead of thinking in the long term, hoping that an angel will come down from the heavens and give you the resources you need to make your recording a great one, do the best you can with the resources you already have. There is ALWAYS room for improvement. So often, I see people on this forum go out and buy the new $999.99 WonderSoundEnhancer1024BitDigitalThingamabobber, only to grumble that they still aren't getting the "big studio sound". It makes me want to laugh, because many of the best recordings I've heard from forum members were made on dirt cheap equipment.
The studio equipment that many of us have, absoultely blows away what was used to record, say, Abbey Road. And I have yet to hear a recording by any forum member, including myself, that competes with anything on that album. I wonder why?
Anyway, just one guy's thoughts. I'm out.
Tom.
).
) for the love of it. Thanx, Tom.
