The house is not a home

[Irwin abrigo]

Hi guys,I think I have come with a wonderful song here.what do you think?


I am proud of this song. please have a read.

The house is not a home
©2008 Irwin Byron Abrigo


If anybody see my baby
tell her that I am feeling lonely
Cause not anyone
can do the things she does
She keeps me lively in the day time
Makes me groan in the nights
but now she is gone I realize

The room is still a room
a chair is still a chair
The bed still lies there
but if she's not here

The house is not a home
The house is not a home
If she 's not here
The house is not a home
The house is not a home
If she's not here
The house is not a home anymore


If any see my lady
tell her that I'm going crazy
She said that she's leaving
we had a quarrel
I said baby don't you worry
I will be happy
but that was a lie cause now I realize

The room is still a room
A chair is still a chair
The bed still lies there
but if she's not there

The house is not a home
The house is not a home
If she's not here
The house is not a home
The house is not a home
If she's not here
The house is not a home anymore

I want the world to know she's one in a million
I am so proud that she was my woman
I wish she can come back to me once more
I turn this house into a home

Because the room is still a room
the chair is still a chair
The bed still lies there
but without her here
The house is not a home anymore
The house is not a home anymore

 

[gecko zzed]

I'd like to know what musical treatment yo have in mind for this.

There are some really interesting bits in your lyrics. I particularly like the way the last line of the verse leads into the chorus:

"but now she is gone I realize

The room is till a room"

and:

"but if she's not there

The house is not a home"

That is really very clever.

The lyrics are a mixture of some ordinary stuff; "tell her that I'm feeling lonely", and some great stuff ;"Makes me groan in the nights".

In verse 2 there appears to be a typo: "If any see my lady", but I like it, and were you to give me this set of lyrics to play with and record, I would be strongly tempted to do the following:

1 Remove as many words as I possibly can get away with while still retaining meaning; and

2 Trying it as reggae.

For example, the first verse could become:

"If any see baby
Tell her I alone
Not anyone
Do thing she do
She lively in day
Make me groan at night
but now she gone
I realize"

Second verse would come out something like:

"If any see lady
tell her I go crazy
She say she leave
We quarrel
I say babe don't worry
I be happy
but that a lie
because I realize"

and so on.

Anyway, that's just a bit of frivolity on my part. I reckon your words will stand up within a song just fine.