The Ballad Of Azrael

  • Thread starter Thread starter FoulPhil
  • Start date Start date
FoulPhil

FoulPhil

Well-known member
This one has been super hard to get this far along. I wrote it last year and had started working on it MONTHS ago. There's still some things about the vocals I can't get a firm grasp on and I doubt I ever will. I think it came out sounding cool anyway. Not sure though LOL...



I see you in the back of the room for the first time I realize how much it means to me
To feel the coldness of your eyes the reflection of your scythe shining down on me
It sends a shiver down my spine the voiceless shadow creeping in the night
A silent reminder that death will take us all and even the good ones will fall

Hourglass in hand waiting for the last gain of sand to fall
Caretaker of the damned collects the souls of us all
Say your prayers before your die
Reaper don't care reaper don't cry
When you hear tolling of the bell
You better pray all is well

Within the shadow of the cloak he hides
I can hear the footsteps of the pale horse he rides.

I'm searching for the chance of a lifetime seeking my immortality
He's lurking through the doorways of the ill, Institutions, rest homes, infirmaries
Will I make it this one last time or fall beneath the power of the knife
Will I grow tired and old my body lay dying in the cold

Don't be afraid to take him by the hand - There are things in life we'll never understand
So make this best of your of life here on earth
The time will come for us all to be burred in the dirt
Say your prayers before your die
Reaper don't care reaper don't cry
When you hear tolling of the bell
You better pray all is well
 
It's very solemn. Your strongest stuff isn't solemn. Just saying.
 
The serious side of FoulPhil! I knew it had to be lurking in there somewhere. Good arrangement. Bass and guitars sound very good. I guess I'm with Dobro in preferring your tongue-in-cheek songs. I think the vocal melody and especially the relationship between melody and lyrics could use some further work. Just for example, when you find yourself extending the word aaaaaaaaand to make it fit your melody, it's probably a sign the lyrics need a tweak or two. Probably just a matter of changing a few words here and there so that the meter of the lyric fits the pulses of the melody better.
 
It's very solemn. Your strongest stuff isn't solemn. Just saying.

Right on :D


The serious side of FoulPhil! I knew it had to be lurking in there somewhere. Good arrangement. Bass and guitars sound very good. I guess I'm with Dobro in preferring your tongue-in-cheek songs. I think the vocal melody and especially the relationship between melody and lyrics could use some further work. Just for example, when you find yourself extending the word aaaaaaaaand to make it fit your melody, it's probably a sign the lyrics need a tweak or two. Probably just a matter of changing a few words here and there so that the meter of the lyric fits the pulses of the melody better.

Yeah it's one of those songs that was perfect at first, but then with time some how got away from me. I'm not sure I'll try to fix it. Seems like if I try too hard to get it right it just get's worse. So, I think I'm going to stick with the formula of getting songs down right when I write them because it works better for me. :thumbs up:
 
I think it's a great song. Some lines don't flow like they should though. Kind of like you struggle a bit here and there to fit more words in that the melody calls for. We all have done it. Fine tuning the lyric and the vocal melody is the ditch digging if songwriting. It's hard to get it perfect but this song is worth the effort I think. As for the mix, I think it's excellent. Very cool use of the stereo field. it just sound really good to my ears man. If I had to make a suggestion it would be that maybe the thin clicky metal sounding bass drum could be replaced with a full bodied deep bass drum. I think it would make the already excellent sounding bass guitar sound even better. It would be worth trying IMO. The bass drum you already have doesn't sound bad though so it's a minor nit.
I think the lyrics are really good. It's an epic song dude. great job!
 
It's cool to hear you doing serious stuff sometimes.

It's a pretty clear mix overall.

I'm not super into the grit on your voice. When you sing cleanly, it sounds emotive; but the gritty parts kind of sound like over-bearing modern hard rock (a la Breaking Benjamin, Disturbed doing ballads, etc.)

ha ha! I misheard "pale horse he rides" as "pale horsey rides" the first time!

The panning is a little extreme. The mix is balanced, but it ends up being a little like you have an acoustic mix on the left and an electric remix on the right.
 
LOL. Well I don't think I'll work on it again for a while. I gets old quick and then I have to just move on lol.
 
I thought the snare got a little lost at times? Vocals sound nice and up-front. The water-y guitar was very cool....very halloween-ish song ;)
 
Back
Top