Tell me if you like these lyrics?

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WEBCYAN

WEBCYAN

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Verse 1
-----------------
Run, desire run,
Sexual being.
Run him like a blade,
to and through the heart.

One consience.
One motive,
to cater to the hollow.

Chorus
-----------------
Screaming...Feed me here.
Fill me up, again.
Temporarily pacify
all the masses, so...

Verse2
-----------------
Flow, libido flow.
Dominos of indescretion, down.
Falling all around in cycles,
in circles.
Constantly consuming,
Conquer and devour.
 
Yup, I like them. :)

In my head I hear them to something like the Sisters of Mercy or Nine Inch Nails. I'd love to hear what you had in mind to wrap around them.

Sounds like a good description of sexploitive marketing. Does anyone but me wonder how a girl feels growing up with all the images of sexy women around? Especially if their body doesn't want to look that way? Sheesh!

It certainly doesn't help the priorities of the young men, either. :rolleyes: I've seen too many wonderful young women go ignored by their male peers who are chasing someone who looks like that billboard over there.

Oh, wait! I'm not even sure if that's what you are talking about, Cyan.

Well, at least your lyrics got me going on something. :)
 
Interesting lyric...Verse 2 complete?2 seems short.....Just a idea...How about starting your 2cd verse ..Run fire Run ..then libito river flow.. and continue on with the same words on the rest of the verse..I got the idea from the sound of the line "Run Desire Run"...very cool line ,very memorable ..would be cool to use a variation of that line! Good work...Interesting stuff!


Don
 
well, i never technically said they were mine.
Looking back on it I obviously gave the wrong impression. Sorry.

I WISH I could write lyrics like that.
Those are complements of Maynard James Keenan's "The Hollow".

And actually, chris, your theory to what its about is exactly what he was going for.

Its interesting that there really isnt much rhyming going on.
How then does it sound so cohesive?

Lots of repetatives, and...those things they talked about in English....where words have the same first letter...

C's:
in cycles,
in circles.
Constantly consuming,
Conquer...
 
Hmm... I really didn't notice the lack of rhyming. I'm a rhym addict with my own stuff, but not when looking at other folk's lyrics.

I think the lack of rhym helps contribute to the anger in this tune. The format of the lyrics contributes to the emotion. Its pretty well done that way, I suppose.

The cohesiveness of the lyrics is kind of evasive. There are a few things that stick out to me, though, as not fitting the tone of the song.

The word "temporarily" doens't fit. I think there is a cadence that is set up by so many 2 and 3 sylable words that holds it together somewhat, and that's why I don't like "temporarily"

"To and through" also sounds a little out of place. A little trite, prehaps?

This is an interesting lyric to ponder. Though I don't really feel like going and listening to the song again. It isn't horrible stuff, but not my cup of tea. :)

Take care,
Chris
 
"To and through" is sung rather fast.
"Temporarily" is really stretched out.
 
OK, Cyan, you got me to bite.

I went back to their web site and listened to all the mixs of "The Holllow" until I found one that I liked. It ended up being thier radio mix.

As is turns out, I clicked on all the wrong songs when I went there the first time. The first (and only) version of this song that I heard was the one that sounded (excuse me, but) like a 4 year old playing keys- very little dynamics. Set me and this band's music off on the wrong foot.

I feel better having listened to some of their other stuff- in fact, it is my cup of tea, to a degree.

Listening to it now, I have a few issues with the delivery of the song, but it pretty much amounts to personal taste. I find the verses a little bland. He plays around the same pitchs a little too much for me. Fits the genre, but its one of the things that's bothered me about the genre recently.

That's a fine song. ;)

Take care,
Chris
 
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