Original song about defying physics to date out of my age range

  • Thread starter Thread starter VomitHatSteve
  • Start date Start date
VomitHatSteve

VomitHatSteve

Hat STYLE. Not contents.
Teenage Girlfriend (tab. Click the title to download mp3.)

Let me know what you think.

Drums are a combination of randomized drum machine and manually placed samples.
Guitars are about half Abomination and half more conventional instruments.

I'm not so sure about the vocals in the mix. Are they too loud? Too quiet? Too inconsistent volume-wise?

As always, any feedback is good to have.
 
I clicked the link but I just got the lyrics. What's wrong with soundclick?
 
It's an extra step to upload them to soundclick, so I usually don't bother. Plus the direct link to the tab allows people to follow along with the song better.

Click the title of the song on the tab to download it.

Edit: Ok. I added it to soundclick: Teenage Girlfriend
 
Last edited:
Fun song! Cool voice. I like the concept as well as the unusual sonic textures. The vox could use a bump in a few spot and for what it's worth I like the effects on the voice (it takes me back to some Cars stuff, which is great because I'm old and crusty like that).:cool:
Now, for the bad part: The bass sounds like it's trapped in a cardboard box. The drums sound like they're trapped in a cardboard box, with cymbals shooting wet cotton balls at me. I think I know what you are aiming for with your bass sound, but it just isn't translating in the mix. I'm not sure what you are aiming for with the drum sound. (If I were smarter I could tell you the khz and crap) The guitar tone is not one that I would use, but I'd have to hear it again without the drums and bass mushing it up. The conflicts really show up about 00:50 into the tune.

I hope I wasn't too harsh or being a jerk with what I just said.

I would love to hear this song again with everything given it's own definition and space.
:)
 
Thanks. It's always good to hear honest criticism.

So the drum and bass need to sound like they're in a larger room? Are you thinking more reverb or what?

For the guitar tone is it the lead or rhythm guitar that's not sitting right with you or both?

I'm not sure what you mean about the cymabls with the wet cotton balls. So much metaphor! :D
 
yeah the drums are boxy...need a better anchor then give the overheads more stereo and some EQing imo

its all a bit boom boom tish...geez Im technical


the vocals sounded fine on my behringer crappolas but the other levels needed some work, didnt like the bass or guitar tone too much, is that your bass invention thing you showcased previously?

the compositions excellent as always though..tonnes to work with
 
VomitHatSteve said:
Thanks. It's always good to hear honest criticism.

So the drum and bass need to sound like they're in a larger room? Are you thinking more reverb or what?

For the guitar tone is it the lead or rhythm guitar that's not sitting right with you or both?

I'm not sure what you mean about the cymabls with the wet cotton balls. So much metaphor! :D
Click to expand...

LMAO!! Yea, I'm not sure what I meant either! Ok, look Greg L is the drum guru around here (get on this Greg! Where the f*** are you anyway?), but I'll try...If you are not using real drums (which I'm pretty sure they're not), then you need to replace the drum samples that come default with your sequence program (ie Sonar's EZ Drummer) with real quality drum samples ($ :(). Then bounce each one to a separate track in your DAW so you can mix it like a real drum set (eq, snare gate, panning, light buss compression, kiss o 'verb on mix, etc).

NO reverb at all on that bass! Is there distortion on it? Lose it or change it. The basic tone needs correction and some mids taming maybe- I'm not sure.

I like what the guitars are playing, it just is not a very convincing tone. Thin? Cheap? I'm not sure and I don't know what the hell 'Abomination' is either (other than something God doesn't like :)) There's so much guitar gadgetry out there...I can't keep up.

Let me know if I can clear anything else up - if I can - I'll try :D
 
Yes, some of the bass/guitar is That Abomination.

That ultimately gives 4 stringed instruments:
Lead guitar (including the off-beats on the chorus) is a Washburn through a 50 W Marshall and DI'd.
Bass 1 is a Fender DI'd for tone and then run through a small Crate monitor for definition.
Rhythm guitar is the guitar channel of the abomination (with bleed from the bass string for extra low-end)
Bass 2 is the bass channel of the abomination through a Bass Balls pedal.

The drums are almost all my own samples. I've already got them separated into separate channels, but I didn't do much with them other than some panning and reverb (and compression on the crash). Should I bring up kick and snare to improve the "anchor?"
I'll try lessening the comp on the crashes and widening their stereo field.

I always try to use reverb to put all the instruments in a similar "room," but I'll try decreasing/removing the 'verb on the basses to see how it sounds.

I should be able to load up a new mix this evening sometime.
 
Ok, I think I get it. You are going for a non-conformist/homegrown-instrumentation type thing. Ok :cool: Well, if you are not going to re-track that bass with an actual bass, then poke out a few lower mids and roll off the bottom and clean up the "Big Balls" pedal thing. Get that snare to punch through the cardboard and the kick cleaned up and we should have something I can relate to. Even if I can't, you're a pioneer, and I'm a dinosaur happily wallowing in the tar pit of the 80's.
Rock on!
 
Just get the kick and snare audible and build around that. If you lose the kick and snare along the way, start dropping shit down. It's okay to turn things down. Your drums are consistently buried under all the weirdness of your mixes. The songs are really great and fun and the weirdness is cool, but crap on a crap cracker, stop burying the fucking drums! :D
 
maybe try scooping around 500Hz on the kick before bringing it up?

I had similar problems on a sample recently and that worked...you could always layer another kick sample then compress them with alternative attacks and release times??


not sure if it'll fix it I just always wanted to suggest that :)
 
kcearl said:
maybe try scooping around 500Hz on the kick before bringing it up?

I had similar problems on a sample recently and that worked...you could always layer another kick sample then compress them with alternative attacks and release times??


not sure if it'll fix it I just always wanted to suggest that :)
Click to expand...

Lol. Considering the fact that the kick is inaudible, scooping anything probably isn't the right move. ;)
 
Greg_L said:
Lol. Considering the fact that the kick is inaudible, scooping anything probably isn't the right move. ;)
Click to expand...

Im using Microsoft Random Response v 2.0.3...I think thats where the problem may lie :)


dont listen to Greg...cut at 500Hz then bring the volume up...he knows dick all about drums, I think he plays the flute! :laughings:
 
Ok. New version.

(Old version) The Soundclick link also contains the new version.

The vocals are a little louder in places where they were quiet. The more basic drums (i.e. Not the weird sweeping low-pass filtered random drums) are much louder. Bass has no reverb and is panned differently... I think I also removed the bass EQ by accident. I just realized that as I type this.

I haven't applied any 500 Hz scoops since I just read that now. Let me know what you think, and I may go back and re-eq the bass and scoop the kick (or whatever).
 
Any recommendations as to where to get some better samples? Ideally, I'd like samples that come with two or three takes of any given hit. The thought being that the different takes will sound different enough that it won't be as mechanical.
 
VomitHatSteve said:
Any recommendations as to where to get some better samples? Ideally, I'd like samples that come with two or three takes of any given hit. The thought being that the different takes will sound different enough that it won't be as mechanical.
Click to expand...


Sounds better already Steve...


just a heads up on free samples there's quite a bit of stuff here

http://www.ultimatemetal.com/forum/production-tips/311618-drum-samples-meta.html

I use SD2, AB70s, and Ableton kits but Ive used some of the samples here as well in Lives drum rack

not exactly the layered stuff you're asking for but I think that would cost $$$


there used to be a free kit from natural sounds thats maybe worth hunting down call ns-kit 7

Ive also found some excellent stuff here like individual cymbal hits etc might be worth having a gander??

http://www.freesound.org/


and this has quite a bit as well


http://musicbootcamp.com/drum-samples-and-music-loops/
 
I think this is one of your better songs, Steve.
Second version works for me.

Joey :)
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top