New song...need some outside opinions please

[Fat_Satchel]

Hiya all! Ive just posted something new to my site and Im looking for that brutal honesty again...The track is "Mother dear".

Heres the link...

Lemming Scream - "Mother dear"

And the lyrics...

Mother dear

Verse:

A shadow in the mirror
The outline still undefined
It isn't getting any clearer
Though it's faded with time
Mother, I'm here by your side
You won't have to go all alone
But I just want to know
What happened to him so long ago

Chorus:

Is it too much to ask to remember the times?
So I can put it all behind me after all these years
Can I take you back there, Mother dear?
Where the grass don't grow
Because it's still, it's still not quite clear

Verse:

No clippings in scrapbooks for me
No mementos that he's left behind
Just pictures of me on his knee
Though they're so hard to find
Mother, why don't you talk about him?
Always like he never was
Do you see too much in me
That echoes of what you have lost?

Chorus:

Is it too much to ask to remember the times?
So I can put it far behind me after all these years
Can I take you back there, Mother dear?
Where the grass don't grow
Because it's still, it's still not quite clear

Bridge:

Mother dear, tell me once more
Because I need to know, Mother dear
Can I take you back there, Mother dear?
__________


So, if you got the time, take a listen and let me know if ya like it or not and why.

Ive been told my songs tend toward personal to the point that only I really understand what the songs about and I have to agree. So, in writing this I tried to avoid that, yet still retain my personal feelings.

So, regardless whether you like it or not, can ya let me know if you "get it"?

Thanks!

LS

 

[Mr. Bert]

I think you have some very deep lyrics there. I had no trouble getting the point and I encourage you to stay with it. Best of luck...Bert

 

[Fat_Satchel]

Thanks Bert, really appreciate you takin the time to comment. I certainly wouldnt call it a formula, but I did some things different while writing this one that seemed to work very well for me.

LS

 

[VSpaceBoy]

Same for me. I got the lyrics.

While listening to the the song, I thought it flowed pretty well. Not my style of music, but I though it definately delivered the lyrics well. Thought the mix could use a little lovin' but all in all I did like it. I've listened to it several times.

Space

 

[amayhem]

thanks man

hey man i felt that shit to the fullest. I felt the anger, sadness, and what you where going through. Keep them coming. 8 out of 10

p.s. I DONT EVEN LIKE ROCK.... and i still felt it. Deep