My New Song.. so far.. Rock style

  • Thread starter Thread starter austinm08
  • Start date Start date
austinm08

austinm08

the pigeon knows the way.
Please throw any comments/suggestions/advice/criticism at me for this song.. It's only half of the first verse that I have recorded so far. I just wrote it a couple days ago. And I'm a newbie at recording.. and writing.. so I would realllly appreciate ANYTHING you have to say. I don't care what it is.. thanks!



Hmm.. I listened to it on another computer in my house, with worse speakers, and noticed I may need to do some adjustments..
and I redid vocals. the first ones were sloppy, didn't sound good.. imo.

Newer version:


EQing, etc- Even newer:
 
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Come on now.. anybody is free to voice their thoughts. And I know you have thoughts.. even if you think it sucks, tell me why. :cool:
 
COLOR=DarkRed]This is one of the worst piece's of shit I have ever heard around here and believe me,I have heard some pretty lame stuff on this bbs.
You belong in a catergory with someone like DavidK,meaning-you make perfectly safe,harmless little soft-faggy records and expect someone like myself to enjoy it?I don't think so.I enjoy real music,not the stink that folks like yourself and DavidK try to pass off as real music.I bet your studio smells like Borders Books,isn't that a favorite hangout of yours?usually people who submit tripe such as yours spend too many hours at coffee shops and bookstores and not enough time gathering real world experience-that is one of the main factors why you will never make it in the music world,it is too brutal for your sensitive bones and twat.
If you came to Mystery Records with material like this I would have my secretary pile-drive your sad ass.
Ted Philips/Mystery Records[/[/COLOR]
 
I listened to:


I don't know what your setup is, but...

In the beginning: I didn't like the tone of the rhythm guitar, too fuzzy for my taste, and the lead sounds alright, but it could use some more treble.

The vocals are a little pitchy but sound pretty good, you have a nice voice, and the vocal melody is good.

I think everything was played good, just the tone of the guitar needs work. What kind of amp are you using, are you micing the amp, or recording direct into the mixer/soundcard?

As far as the mix goes, I can't say for sure as I'm just listening on some stereo desktop speakers, but I didn't really notice anything 'wrong' about it...

Overall sounds like a start to a good song, keep it up. :)
 
danny.guitar said:
I listened to:


I don't know what your setup is, but...

In the beginning: I didn't like the tone of the rhythm guitar, too fuzzy for my taste, and the lead sounds alright, but it could use some more treble.

The vocals are a little pitchy but sound pretty good, you have a nice voice, and the vocal melody is good.

I think everything was played good, just the tone of the guitar needs work. What kind of amp are you using, are you micing the amp, or recording direct into the mixer/soundcard?

As far as the mix goes, I can't say for sure as I'm just listening on some stereo desktop speakers, but I didn't really notice anything 'wrong' about it...

Overall sounds like a start to a good song, keep it up. :)
Click to expand...
thanks for the reply! I would answer all your questions, but I've got to go to work right now.. sorry! I'll get back to you.
 
Hey austinm08 - I listened to your last version also (on earphones)

Good songwriting - catchy, nice melody and good beat.

The guitar panning is good - haven't heard too much of that. You were able to pan it l/r enough to get the effect of panning but didn't go too far to either side where it becomes "too far". Cool.....

The lead could come up just a touch or as danny.guitar suggested maybe some more highs to bring it up a bit. Wonder what this might sound like with a little less distortion...hmmmmm.

Could use a bit of stereo here - you could record multiple rhythm guitars and pan them left/right. Just a thought.

Drums sound just ok - programmed drums? If yes you've done some interesting work there on patterns but the sound is just ok.

Keep working on it - coming along good......

:D :) :D :)
 
danny.guitar said:
I listened to:


I don't know what your setup is, but...

In the beginning: I didn't like the tone of the rhythm guitar, too fuzzy for my taste, and the lead sounds alright, but it could use some more treble.

The vocals are a little pitchy but sound pretty good, you have a nice voice, and the vocal melody is good.

I think everything was played good, just the tone of the guitar needs work. What kind of amp are you using, are you micing the amp, or recording direct into the mixer/soundcard?

As far as the mix goes, I can't say for sure as I'm just listening on some stereo desktop speakers, but I didn't really notice anything 'wrong' about it...

Overall sounds like a start to a good song, keep it up. :)
Click to expand...
I recorded direct. I always had had problems micing my cabinet; I never figured it out. I always got a 'hollow' sound.. So I decided to go direct and it was great. I guess I could go back to micing and try to figure it out.

Thanks man! :)


ido1957 said:
Hey austinm08 - I listened to your last version also (on earphones)

Good songwriting - catchy, nice melody and good beat.

The guitar panning is good - haven't heard too much of that. You were able to pan it l/r enough to get the effect of panning but didn't go too far to either side where it becomes "too far". Cool.....

The lead could come up just a touch or as danny.guitar suggested maybe some more highs to bring it up a bit. Wonder what this might sound like with a little less distortion...hmmmmm.

Could use a bit of stereo here - you could record multiple rhythm guitars and pan them left/right. Just a thought.

Drums sound just ok - programmed drums? If yes you've done some interesting work there on patterns but the sound is just ok.

Keep working on it - coming along good......

:D :) :D :)
Click to expand...
Yes, I know exactly what you mean on the panning. I noticed that if I panned too far one way, it would get too quiet.. because it would be only one speaker obviously, so I tried to find an optimal spot so you could still notice it. I had really been wanting to use that effect, and I didn't know how to, but I discovered that you do it with envelopes, and I didn't think it was that easy to do! :P

I'll try adding some highs like you said.. and may turn down the distortion to see how it affects it. Thanks for the suggestions.

Stereo: Yeah I hadn't done that (recording multiple takes of each guitar) pretty because of my laziness.. haven't set out to do it yet. And, sometimes I get worried that I'll get too far off with one of them, and it won't sound tight, but more spread out and mushed up or something. but I'll try it.

Drums: yeah, I don't have sufficient equipment to mic drums and have a good sound. They were done through Fruity Loops. I'm not a drummer myself, but I try to come up with something that sounds good. I really have no clue what I'm doing in that area :P

Thanks for the compliments guys.. You are really encouraging. Sometimes I wonder if it is good at all.. and I don't hear anything from others, but when you guys say "it's coming along good.. a start to a good song" it really boosts my confidence. Thanks so much.
 
austinm08 said:
I recorded direct. I always had had problems micing my cabinet; I never figured it out. I always got a 'hollow' sound.. So I decided to go direct and it was great. I guess I could go back to micing and try to figure it out.
Click to expand...
I admit I record direct from my Marshall and the clean sounds good but the overdrive sound is not so great. I'm working on micing more now. And mic placement is key......

austinm08 said:
Stereo: Yeah I hadn't done that (recording multiple takes of each guitar) pretty because of my laziness.. haven't set out to do it yet. And, sometimes I get worried that I'll get too far off with one of them, and it won't sound tight, but more spread out and mushed up or something. but I'll try it.
Click to expand...
One word - thick and chunky (oops that's two).....

austinm08 said:
Thanks for the compliments guys.. You are really encouraging. Sometimes I wonder if it is good at all.. and I don't hear anything from others, but when you guys say "it's coming along good.. a start to a good song" it really boosts my confidence. Thanks so much.
Click to expand...
You're welcome....

:D :) :D :)
 
ido1957 said:
I admit I record direct from my Marshall and the clean sounds good but the overdrive sound is not so great. I'm working on micing more now. And mic placement is key......


One word - thick and chunky (oops that's two).....


You're welcome....

:D :) :D :)
Click to expand...
Thanks for all your help Ido.. means a lot to me.
 
I like your vocals alot on this...you have a good voice and the backing/harmony vocal fits well.I agree with the other post that the drums are kinda weak.Not sure how you could fix 'em as I have never used fruity loops before generally use pre-made drum loops like smart loops or betamonkee.Sounds like this will be cool when you finish it up.
 
variaxman said:
I like your vocals alot on this...you have a good voice and the backing/harmony vocal fits well.I agree with the other post that the drums are kinda weak.Not sure how you could fix 'em as I have never used fruity loops before generally use pre-made drum loops like smart loops or betamonkee.Sounds like this will be cool when you finish it up.
Click to expand...
Thanks bro! You must have listened to one before I redid the vocals.. because I didn't have the harmonies on the newest version (v5). Thanks.. you're really encouraging
 
Ive tried every version you have posted and cant get more than the first 20 seconds to play. Can ya post it on soundclick or somewhere?

Take 'er easy,..
Calwood
 
Calwood said:
Ive tried every version you have posted and cant get more than the first 20 seconds to play. Can ya post it on soundclick or somewhere?

Take 'er easy,..
Calwood
Click to expand...
Got soundclick, uploaded song, can't figure out how to get link to profile. Will get back to you later.. gotta go to work.
 
Well,..its a pretty short clip,..so its hard to tell if it's a good song or not. I like the rotating guitar idea in the intro. I'm not too crazy about the lead over it though. That may be that it's pretty much the same tone as the other guitar,..and very dry. Maybe with a different tone and some delay or something it might work. When the drums start it sounds like the song falls into nowhere. A little bit awkward,... that whole part when the drums come in and the singing starts.
Thats about all can say as far as writing.

Mix wise,..yeah I agree with earlier comments,..drums are weak,..no bass(at least I cant hear one),...the guitar needs more takes and panning (and in my opinion ditch the direct in and go back to micing),...maybe with a harmony line in thier to go along with the singing.

Like everyone else said though,..good start. It's worth working on. I can see a few directions this could go in. It all depends on what you do with it.
The vox are fine,..but wihtout any of the other mix elements they stick out too far. But,..with the slight instrumentation you have in their,..thats the way it's gonna be I suppose.
Good luck with it.

Take 'er easy,..
Calwood
 
Calwood said:
Well,..its a pretty short clip,..so its hard to tell if it's a good song or not. I like the rotating guitar idea in the intro. I'm not too crazy about the lead over it though. That may be that it's pretty much the same tone as the other guitar,..and very dry. Maybe with a different tone and some delay or something it might work. When the drums start it sounds like the song falls into nowhere. A little bit awkward,... that whole part when the drums come in and the singing starts.
Thats about all can say as far as writing.

Mix wise,..yeah I agree with earlier comments,..drums are weak,..no bass(at least I cant hear one),...the guitar needs more takes and panning (and in my opinion ditch the direct in and go back to micing),...maybe with a harmony line in thier to go along with the singing.

Like everyone else said though,..good start. It's worth working on. I can see a few directions this could go in. It all depends on what you do with it.
The vox are fine,..but wihtout any of the other mix elements they stick out too far. But,..with the slight instrumentation you have in their,..thats the way it's gonna be I suppose.
Good luck with it.

Take 'er easy,..
Calwood
Click to expand...
Thank you for your opinion. I have been listening to what I have so far for a few days.. and I've decided to re do it completely I think. I'm starting to hate the intro.. I think it sounds weird and doesn't fit the song.. and the whole rhythm of the rhythm guitar is not working.. I'm going to do a straight rhythm, (as in hitting the strings on every beat).. I think I can get this to sound much better.. yeah the drums are crap. Did them on a program.. maybe I can do better with those. I have a bass in there but it is quiet. Like I said, I'm new to this.. :) But I think I can get this to turn out much better after I redo it.. and change the tone of the guitars as well.
 
I noticed the guitar in the beginning clipping. Also, you may want to get something better for drum programming and a better drum sound library. Having a good drum sound is very important in modern music.
 
I agree about the drums, during the song it doesn't seem too bad, but that last beat before the song cuts off is obviously programmed....sounds like you used Guitar Pro 5's drumkit or something similiar...

A good drum program, that doesn't seem to be very popular, is called Drumsite (http://www.guitar.sk/drums/drums_main.htm), it can load MIDI files, and gives you options for panning each drum (tom, snare, etc.), reverb, compression, etc.

It's also pretty cheap. :cool:
 
danny.guitar said:
I agree about the drums, during the song it doesn't seem too bad, but that last beat before the song cuts off is obviously programmed....sounds like you used Guitar Pro 5's drumkit or something similiar...

A good drum program, that doesn't seem to be very popular, is called Drumsite (http://www.guitar.sk/drums/drums_main.htm), it can load MIDI files, and gives you options for panning each drum (tom, snare, etc.), reverb, compression, etc.

It's also pretty cheap. :cool:
Click to expand...
Ok I'll check that out.

Thanks danny and monkey.
 
I really like the song, pretty catchy. Are the vocals supposed to sound like that kind of radio quality sound? They sound really good if you are going for that effect. For the guitars, (this is stylelistic) but I would try cleaning them up a lot to sorta of warm hollowbody feel with individual picking notes in the chord. I don't know. Just an idea.
 
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