Lyrically speaking, what does this say to you?

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pikingrin

pikingrin

what is this?
I've been trying to write lyrics for this song that I've been done with (musically) for about the last 8 months... I'm still working out the kinks in the lyrics, kind of trying to fit the mood that I want portrayed. So, I ask you... What do these lyrics say to you?

(Verse 1)
So I guess I overestimated your speed
Or maybe underestimated this disease (called love)
But baby, at this pace we'll never make it anywhere

(Chorus or something)
So open up your eyes
And open up to me

(Verse 2)
These summer nights are over now
And this pandora's box that we've embraced has grown and
Blown up in our faces
But I resign to hang on every word and every last thread
Everything she said

(Bridge)
It's over now, no matter how hard
But I reside, here in the afterglow

We're older now, both colder how?
But I resign to baske in the afterglow

We're bolder now, and stronger
But I decide to baske in the afterglow

(Chorus)


Now, if you were listening to that (you can listen to the music here, the first song on the list), what would it make you feel?
 
It seems as though the narrator is finally realizing the inner linings of his romantic relationship. But its through the perspective of retrospect. What he realizes is that it is over, there were mistakes, etc. But still, a part of him is still attached to that relationship, and can't let it go completely.


Anyway, thats how it appears to me.
 
I agree..

I thought I posted on this?

Anyway the only thing that confused me, was the last line V2.
I'd change that? unless I read it wrong, it seems to jump out and go 3rd party all of a sudden.

(Verse 1) Speaking I to YOU
So I guess I overestimated your speed
Or maybe underestimated this disease (called love)
But baby, at this pace we'll never make it anywhere

(Chorus or something) Speaking I to YOU
So open up your eyes
And open up to me

(Verse 2) Speaking I to YOU
These summer nights are over now
And this pandora's box that we've embraced has grown and
Blown up in our faces
But I resign to hang on every word and every last thread
Everything she (you) said

(Bridge)
It's over now, no matter how hard
But I reside, here in the afterglow

We're older now, both colder how?
But I resign to baske in the afterglow

We're bolder now, and stronger
But I decide to baske in the afterglow
 
pikingrin said:
I've been trying to write lyrics for this song that I've been done with (musically) for about the last 8 months... I'm still working out the kinks in the lyrics, kind of trying to fit the mood that I want portrayed. So, I ask you... What do these lyrics say to you?

Now, if you were listening to that (you can listen to the music here, the first song on the list), what would it make you feel?
Click to expand...

On reading without listening, I ge the sense that...
1) boy meets girl
2) they did "it"
3) they broke up because things were too intense
4) boy just wants to think of the good stuff and reminisce


Can you post the name of the song on MySpace - is it only instrumental so far? I listened to a few but was never sure which one you were referring to.
 
Thanks for the replies you guys. I'm usually kind of over-critical of my lyrics, but I like the feedback and the input!

Ido - The song title is "New Song", it's the first one on the list. And...we did a little more than "it"... But I digress...:D

Coolcat - You have a good point, I just recorded the vocals this past weekend...I gotta listen to what I did right there.
 
pikingrin said:
Ido - The song title is "New Song", it's the first one on the list. And...we did a little more than "it"... But I digress...:D
Click to expand...

OKay - problem was there never used to be a scroll bar (limit 4 songs) so you saw all the posted songs. Now with more than 4 songs posted the list scrolled down so that Complicated was the first song showing. My little brain prevented me from seeing the scroll bar on the first few times opening the page :rolleyes:

"New Song" is really well played and recorded. I look forward to hearing some vocals with it....
 
i really liked the rhythm chords sound at the beginning of the verse sections, pulls the listener in... almost symphony like.
i think its the tempo of the strumming? it works really well.
good catching riff too.

piano, some tiffani...? hmmm could be quite a huge build up on the last of it.

then again a heavy metal version of it would be interesting with that riff.

acoustic instrument had a Zep sound to it...Zeppelin 3.
 
a quick comment....my favorite lines were the following....

So I guess I overestimated your speed

These summer nights are over now

But I reside, here in the afterglow

don't know why. they just sound interesting to me.
 
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