i might be a redneck

  • Thread starter Thread starter jimistone
  • Start date Start date
You have a gun rack on your bicycle.

You have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.

You have a very special baseball cap, just for formal occassions.

You have an Elvis Jell-o mold.

You have ever bar-be-qued hamburgers at the driver-in theater.

You have ever been fired from a construction job because of your
appearance.
 
You have ever driven down the road with your seat belt hanging out of the door making sparks.

You have ever had to scratch your sister or girlfriend's name out of the
message "For a good time, call _______."

You have ever lost a tooth opening a beer bottle.

You have ever signed a petition to have the national anthem changed to "Free Bird."

You have ever spray-painted your girlfriend's name on an overpass.
 
You have every episode of Hee-Haw on video tape.

You have grease under your toenails.

You have refused to watch the Academy Awards since "Smokey and the Bandit" was snubbed for best picture.

You have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.

You have spray painted your girlfriend's name on an overpass.

You have started a petition to change the National Anthem to "Georgia on My Mind".
 
if your idea of a hellava Sat. night is to grab a 5th of Jack Danials, put on some Conway Twitty and watch Hogs mate...

if you love your blue tick hound more than your wife....

if you were the one hollering "play some fuckin' skynyrd!!!" at your daughters wedding reception....

if cows wink at you, moan gently. and lick thier lips....you might be a redneck
 
Ah HELL Ive done about half the things you'ens listed here. And you have a sticker on you truck that reads : MY GRASS IS BLUE, DIE YUPPIE SCUM, and YANKEE GO HOME you're a redneck and I display mine proudly-----and I don't care what anyovya's say, spam with eggs is goooood. And you can do so kninky stuff with lard in the bed. LOL By the way the REAL Barney is black and white, NOT purple. N.C. ROCKS
 
Actually, im from missississississippi (was that to many crooked letters?.....typo). So I too am southern. When you be's from missippi (got it that time!). your either a redneck....or ya get da blues...cause dis be's da home of da blues! I got the blues y'all......cause...you KNOW you got da blues when.....you found out your woman done run off with your best friend AND your guitar

you KNOW ya got da blues when.....you is on stage and that mic be shockin' the piss out your ass when you trying to sing

you KNOW you got da blues when....you get that killer take and sigh with relief and hi 5 everyone and realize...you had the track on moniter instead of record

Jimistone (longhaired redneck bluesman)
 
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