Fee Fi Fo Fum - Blues Rock Song

[jonlint]

Please critique this song and mix:

https://soundcloud.com/jonathan-linton-3/fee-fi-fo-fum-20140308

FEE FI FO FUM - Jonathan
(Words and Music by Jonathan Linton)

I’ll tell you a story ‘bout Jack and the beanstalk
Jack’s and older guy but handy with his pitchfork
He had no home garden so he paid to get some gardening time
Searching for some fertile ground to plant his seed
This lady told him “Jack!, I got just what you need!”
“I got a flower bed you’ll find that tending it is quite sublime”
He got a little moisture in the flower bed
But his stalk wouldn’t grow, it seemed to be dead
She said “don’t worry Jack, I got a gard’ning tip that’ll make it all fine”

She said “Take this magic bean and you’re good to go
And in a little while it’ll start to grow
And soon you’ll be reaping all that you can sow
And you’ll have a green thumb, FE FI FO FUM!”
(FE FI FO FUM)

Just as she said the magic bean turned the tide
And Jack left the garden feeling satisfied
She said “you’re a gifted gardener Jack, come tend my garden anytime!”
But Jack didn’t know that besides his seed
Some else was planting and he left some weeds
And Jack had a rash and learned a hard lesson from his playtime

She said “Take this magic bean and you’re good to go
And in a little while it’ll start to grow
And soon you’ll be reaping all that you can sow
And you’ll have a green thumb, FE FI FO FUM!”
(FE FI FO FUM)

 

[Pinky]

Production is okay. I might rein in the panned guitars a bit, they can get a distracting when playing loose. Pull them a touch to center, allow them to share a little space, and that loose playing shouldn't be so dramatic.

The vocals are the weakest part of the performance. They're not terrible, just stick out like a sore thumb compared with the capable playing on the rest of the song. I usually drench my vocals in chorus to help make them more pleasant.

 

[jonlint]

Thanks for the feedback, Pinky. Which type of chorus do you use? Do you have any suggested settings or FX chain?

 

[Pinky]

Usually I EQ then add chorus. Lately for vocals I've been using Cakewalk's free multi chorus that comes with Sonar X2, usually a simple stereo or subtle use of the 6 voice chorus. Whether you add any compression before or after effects is personal preference/objective.

I'd do a separate uneffected track for reverb and mix them together. I wouldn't add reverb in the same chain as the chorus.

 

[gecko zzed]

Like Pinky, I thought the production was pretty good.

unlike Pinky I didn't mind the panned guitars.

I enjoyed the lead break.

Also unlike Pinky, I didn't mind the vocals. I concede that the vocal performance is probably not the height of musical excellence. However, it is quirky enough to suit the nature of the lyrics. Were you to redo them, I would exaggerate the vocal delivery even more.

 

[Mr Clean]

Nice little fun song. I too don't mind the vocals, I think they're quirky and suit the song. Although there are a couple of spots where you sound like you're struggling/pushing your voice a little/to reach the note. But it adds to the quirkiness of it for me.

Sounds good here to me. I really enjoyed the tune. Cheers

 

[TripleM]

I thought this was pretty good. Guitars sound nice. I might give them a little boost in the high midrange. Like 3.5Khz or so. They need just a little bite to my ear. Alternatively a small notch cut somewhere between 180hz and 350hz might to the same sort of thing.

Maybe a bit of a low end problem. I'm hearing some rumblies. Maybe roll off some low end on the bass.

I think a doubled lead vocal would sound better. Need some harmony vocals too.