Cover Yourself in Construction Paper Hearts

[Skeeter]

I'm dabbling in some electronica-core with my wife; it's a lot of fun and it moves me away from my guitar-dependency. Here's the "lead single" of the songs we've done. Lyrics below, recording here on myspace.

Cover Yourself in Construction Paper Hearts

Cover yourself in construction paper hearts
And I'll write a poem on every one
Then we'll stand out in the middle of the square
On a pedestal built for two
With a kiss framed in a photograph
On the cover of a magazine

[chorus]
Cover yourself in construction paper hearts!

Cover yourself in construction paper hearts
And I'll plant a kiss on every one
Then we'll hide ourselves underneath the stairs
And hold each other's breath until we drown
Place me in a self-addressed stamped envelope
So I'll see you again!

[chorus]

[bridge]
Oh! we've got glitter and gluesticks!
We've got scissors and sharpies!
We've got kisses and cutouts!
We've got marriage and makeouts!

[chorus]

 

[gecko zzed]

The lyrics are highly original, and very whimsical.

Excellent writing . . . concise, and a great selection of words and phrases.

I listened to the song. The musical ideas are great . . . again original and interesting, and a very clever arrangement.

But . . . you know what? For me there was a huge disconnect between the lyrics and their vocal treatment. Sometimes this works, and is worth trying. But not for me this time. There is a subtlety in the writing that is lost by the uniform barking of the lyrics throughout the song.

I think you have an excellent set of lyrics here, and I'm sure they could be set in a bed of music that would wring every emotional nuance out of them.

 

[Strat1958]

Good lyrics, Skeeter...very reminiscent of Death Cab For Cutie's stuff.

 

[Frankie Rage]

For me, "Death Cab For Cutie" will forever be the song of that name by "The Bonzo dog doo-dah band" !!! My favourite band (after The Beatles..)

Getting back to this song, "Cover yourself in construction paper hearts"; what is a "construction paper heart" ??? (...Sorry, I'm English!)

I like the song. It sounds like a cross between "Talking Heads" and "Iggy Pop" to me. Which is a nice idea! BUT, your vocal delivery although similar isn't as tuneful as Iggy, so I'd try and get more melody into it, if you can.

But I liked it, nonetheless...

However, the next few tracks sounded decidedly ordinary to me, both musically and vocals-wise (sorry) so I'd make "Cover yourself in construction paper hearts" your quality base point, and throw the rest of the tracks in the bin...

But I'm not you, so... good luck with your project!

Fx

 

[rayc]

For quite a while I thought construction paper was a great name for a band.
Craft paper, coloured paper for cutting out etc. don't quite cut it though.
My ONLY quibble is that my brain keeps expecting a rhyme with one. It's clever when you go to two & that satisfied me but in the 2nd when it goes to drown I felt let down.
I'm obvioulsy a creature with deeply seated expectations about how the world works:
even a construction paper globe,
slowly turning beneath a strobe,
From each construction paper heart
I cut out a little part
and glue it to my own,
it sits unused beside my phone
which has yet to take a call,
see, I have no hope at all.....
In my construction paper world
I make plans that aren't unfurled
But each brightly coloured page
sublimates mt mounting rage
Now I cut and fold and glue
so I don't take it out on YOU!
Please use my space for networking BUT get a better place to post your tunes for criticism or just better listening.
the vocals work in a little B52s style & almost Beefheartish. The juxtaspoition is fine, a little old hat but OK, You might find that if you do at least a couple of lines differently you'll add an interesting contrast. the spruiker style with the bvox added is fine though.