Barely Alive - Grunge Song

jonlint

Member
Hi all,

Wrote and recorded this 90's grunge vibe song over a weekend. Feedback most welcome:

Barely Alive by Jonathan Linton 4 | Free Listening on SoundCloud

BARELY ALIVE
(Words by Jonathan Linton, Music by Jonathan Linton)

I’m a machine
Help everyone
I’ve always been
The unfortunate son
So leave me behind
With my despair
I have resigned
To go nowhere

Body is strong
But the mind is gone
Hope deprived
I’m barely alive
Each time
I find
A lifeline
It’s deprived
Yeah, I’m barely alive

I’ve been accused
I’ve been abused
They even hide
When they’re amused
Preyed upon
Future foregone
Ambition gone
But doomed to live on

Body is strong
But the mind is gone
Hope deprived
I’m barely alive
Each time
I find
A lifeline
It’s deprived
Yeah, I’m barely alive

SOLO

Body is strong
But the mind is gone
Hope deprived
I’m barely alive
Each time
I find
A lifeline
It’s deprived
Yeah, I’m barely alive
I’m barely alive
I’m barely alive
Barely alive
Barely alive
 
Last edited:

PoeticIntensity

AdvancedBudgetStudios.com
Okay... Straight from the gate, this sucker ROCKS! Yeah, man. Guitars are very present, and the drums are kickin'. Very exciting aurally.

About half-way through the song, one thing that, which is totally subjective, kind of got on my nerves was the vocal doubling throughout. The harmonies are great, but the main melody is also doubled, and this would be okay usually, but the rest of the instrumentation is just awesome. To illustrate the difference, when the solo comes in, everything is clean and clear - with *one* solo guitar playing... The vocals could do the same if the main melody was just a solo voice, and perhaps even if some of the harmonies were taken out. They're just a bit more messy than the rest of the instrumentation. (and I'm being very nit-picky here) The song sounds great, and the mix is awesome!

Great work! Thanks for sharing.
 

jonlint

Member
Okay... Straight from the gate, this sucker ROCKS! Yeah, man. Guitars are very present, and the drums are kickin'. Very exciting aurally.

About half-way through the song, one thing that, which is totally subjective, kind of got on my nerves was the vocal doubling throughout. The harmonies are great, but the main melody is also doubled, and this would be okay usually, but the rest of the instrumentation is just awesome. To illustrate the difference, when the solo comes in, everything is clean and clear - with *one* solo guitar playing... The vocals could do the same if the main melody was just a solo voice, and perhaps even if some of the harmonies were taken out. They're just a bit more messy than the rest of the instrumentation. (and I'm being very nit-picky here) The song sounds great, and the mix is awesome!

Great work! Thanks for sharing.

Hey there,

Thanks for the compliments and feedback. There is some wisdom in your critique, and good critique should be nit-picky, so no apologies needed. I will consider taking some harmonies out and maybe raising the doubling vocals in their place for the final version.

In the meantime, I made a remix because some of the mix balance was off to me and also based on some critique. Here it is:

Barely Alive V2 by Jonathan Linton 4 | Free Listening on SoundCloud
 

Bulls Hit

Well-known member
Top riffs and the vocals are very good. Nitpicking the rythym chugs could have been heavier/beefier. On headphones tho. Nice job
 

PDP

There once was a note
I thought this was a very well written and produced song. I thought the kick and snare could come up 1db maybe. Otherwise this is ready. I'd target this to the grunge market. Get it out there.
 
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