ahem (need some advice)

  • Thread starter Thread starter Layla Nahar
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Layla Nahar

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why is everything I write so stupid? Why does my dance stuff sound tinky and cute? Why does my guitar stuff sound pretty and etherial....

I wanna be a lot uglier

The thing I hate the most is that when I say to my self (Self!) - ok, i'm gonna spend at least 2 hours a day dedicated to writing, I'm not gonna let the critic get me down, I'm gonna let it flow then fix it later .. at that .. approaching stage I'm charged, I feel like this time its gonna be it - I'm gonna get the stuff I'm dreaming of... and then once I actually start writing, and I see the stuff (hear, sorry) that comes out ... I just get so dam depressed that I wanna give up completely...

anybody else have that problem? just really hating the stuff that you are capable of and feeling that its just not what you want to do, not what you are shooting for?

anybody who had this overcome it? (& how???)
 
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Yeah, I've been writing and playing out for 10 years now and i've quit music for good about 30 times at least. I was sitting around during one of the breaks at a show in my hometown talking with a guitar player who is quite a bit older and a hell of a lot better on the instrument than i am. He and i were talking about the same sort of thing. He said "you always want to get to that level of ability that you feel is acceptable, and you never make it!" this coming from a guy who kept my jaw on the floor all night. Now that was a statement!

If you're interested in the whole deal where musicians and artists tend to be a little more self-critical and moody than the general population check out the book TOUCHED WITH FIRE by Kay Redfield Jamison ( I think that's the author's name?) Reading that made me feel better, in that I am not alone in my neurotic tedencies.

Van Gogh only sold two paintings to people outside his immediate family during his lifetime. He died thinking he was a failure as an artist. Good luck! Lots of us out here feel you. Don't give up on it.
 
i was searching the net late one night on a quest for inspiration when i found this funny little site with five little stories/creativity tips. i printed them off and occasionally refer to them when my thoughts get cloudy and i feel like quitting it all. i dont know if it will help but here is the link anyway.


http://www.fablevision.com/education/creativity_tips/
 
Ask yourself what it is about your music that you find so bad and ask yourself what artists do you want to sound like. Then spend all your time doing nothing but listening to those artists. When you listen, identify those things that make them sound so good to you. If you can't nail down exactly what it is, then do some research to find out what music inspired that artist and listen to that music. You can even go as far as learning their music on your instrument. Steer clear of your own stuff during this entire process. Do this long enough and you will be able to mentally articulate exactly what it is that you like about that music. Afterwards, approach your instrument on a mission to accomplish exactly what it is you heard. You will find that you have a new approach to your own music that you will actually like.

I do this all the time without any intent to change the way I write music, and after a few months of soaking in the vibe of a particular artist I like, that style just naturally flows out of me.
 
I think it's important to simply recognize that you won't always be satisfied with what you write, and that you may often have to struggle with your work before you get what you want out of it. That's not a mark against you and it doesn't make you any less competent of a songwriter, so don't let it discourage you too much.

I could write pages about this, but my most important suggestion is this: When you're excited to write, do it, but try not to anticipate too much. Just sit down and write, and DON'T stop writing. If you get frustrated, move on to something else. Nothing makes a writer more stagnant than trying to get everything right at once.

Peter
 
I don't really have anything much to add. Just wanted to back upo what "leavings" is saying - there will always be times when you suck, you just have to work on through it bro
 
G'morning Layla,
I think that this is one of those questions that only you have the answer to. But, here is some food for thought;
Have you read the book "Zen Guitar" by Philip Toshio Sudo? Excellent bathroom reading (short chapters).

Maybe you're writing what you're meant to write. Could be that all you need is to embrace it.
I'm not a "shredder". I've played with some shredders and thought to myself, "Damn, that guy's way better than me. I'll never be as good as him". Then the guy will say to me "Damn, how do you finger-pick like that? I could never get that good". :) I used to jam with a fella named Jim Kline. A classical guitar player. A child prodogy compared to Segovia when he was 12. Now, he tours for the University of Oregon. So, I'm thinking, "I'm not worthy, I'm not worthy". One day he turns to me and says, "How do you do that? You just make stuff up to songs you don't even know".

Kinda like watching a magician. If you don't know the tricks...you're awestruck.

Hell, rock stars wanna be pro athletes and pro athletes wanna be rock stars.

Like I said, no answers. Just food for thought.
Break a leg,
Bill
 
Never being satisfied is one of the hardest things to come to grips with when writing (as I have found out very recently). It is the thing that will drive you to insanity but it is also the thing that will keep you progressing. In my own writing I try to figure out exactly what is bothering me in a particular song then change things slightly in whatever direction I feel is needed while keeping my original inspired idea. It can be a simple as a tempo change or you could end up with a completely different monster. Writing different kinds of music has a lot of learning included in it. Something to try is to learn, in depth, the kind of music you wish to write then instead of copying it, make it into your own by including some of your past successfull ideas as well as new.

I don't know if any of this makes sense or helps but good luck and never give up.
 
I wanted to thank everyone who responded. I was really hoping for time to say individual responses to each persons suggestions but, alas - I'm in school...

But the stuff y'all said was really useful and it was encouraging to get all that feedback. I got to work a looooot on that negative self-talk thing. That critic *really* gets you down
 
just to throw in my two pence worth (after the conversation has passed, typical!) i feel that each writer has their own idiosyncracies, which from time to time piss them off, but which contribute to their style. if everyone could play everything then their would be no need for anything other than one almighty muzak godhead responsible for every piece of recorded music ever. ;)

i'm not making light of this dilemma, i go through it regularly but at the end of the day, if i do a swamp metal song in 12/8 it will still bear a striking resemblance to all the other fiddly acoustic nonsense i usually write...we cannot escape our inner voice!!!
 
I finally had to come to terms with the fact that my songs suck. I haven't stopped writing I've just stopped expecting them to be any good, lol.
 
Hey Layla,
you should write down how you really feel more often. In this one paragraph you have the beginnings of somthing that could be good. First let me tell you that I write down everything that seems important to me (or stupid or silly or whatever) I keep a little notebook with me and when something comes to mind I jot it down. Songwriting for me is not something that happens in two hour blocks or when I think I should be writing, it is a 24/7 event. Inspiration can strike at any moment and you need to ready for it. OK about what I said earlier, look at what you wrote in this post.
The thing I hate the most is that when I say to my self
i'm gonna spend 2 hours a day writing,
I'm not gonna let the critic get me down,
I'm gonna let it flow then fix it later
I'm charged, I feel like this time its gonna be it -
I'm gonna get the stuff I'm dreaming of...
Chorus
then once I actually start,
I see the stuff that comes out ...
I get so depressed
I wanna give up (break)
completely...
WOW, I just took what you said and though not perfect it's a usable lyric. You have all the elements required for developing this concept further. You decide what the element of conflict is for the next 2 0r 3 verses, then come back to the chorus. The word "completely" is your song title and your hook. Lastly so you don't leave your audience depressed over all your inadequacies you add a bridge that reveals the positive side of you life and change the final chorus to say that in truth you'll never give up.. completely.
Hope I didn't step on your toes, and this actually helps. Just keep writing
J
 
This works for me

I`ve found I write my best stuff when I have taken a break from it for a week or two. I need to let my emotions build up, so they dont get spread too thin. I can write 1 all-right song a day or write 1 killer song a month. I`ve found it`s like love, if you go look for it all the time you`ll never find it. It has to come to you.
 
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