A little help here...

  • Thread starter Thread starter Michael Wilson
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Michael Wilson

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With all this talk about under-rated,lyric genious's,my blood started boiling so strong that I had to go get my guitar out of hawk and work on a few lyrics of my own.So,I came up with the first couple of verses and hit a wall.I'm still not sure where to go with it...Any ideas?
Blood stains on the front of my jeans​
I can't remember,how peculiar it seems
Oh,Lord,what have I got myself into this time?​
Somethin' just ain't right
My ol' lady's just a-starin' at me​
Lyin' in a pool of blood,how can this be?
I slap myself in the face just hopin' it's all a dream​
And then it all comes back to me... :cool:
 
Looks like a Sid Vicious kind a story. Well, cops come in, they take you away, to some jail, you get fucked by gangmembers.......Mmmm this could be cruel.
 
In Response...

Where is exactly where I'm stuck.This song could go in several directions.I guess it would be a lot easier to write if the situation had actually happened. Like if I really had killed my wife and then had to live out the repercussions of my actions.Maybe I should try it!!! Not. :cool:
 
hmmm that sounds rather.... i dont even know if i have a word for it. if you are going to do that i would suggest that in the end it be an illusion or a dream, you wake up and see that things are not as they seemed in your dreams. i dunno but if thats what you wanna do then rock on. go on with the story line you start going crazy trying to clean up the mess and then the door bell rings blah blah blah.
 
Try this, if you like:

Chorus along the lines of "Got so angry and I lost control, why did you do this to me, why did you make me this way" (you coud get a good hooky chorus going along these lines)

Then a second verse which is sort of a flashback, some lines about what she did that made you lose it and assault her - that narrative of course would then lead you neatly into the chorus lines again. Third verse could be the consequences, nothing left for me now, how a moment could destroy two lives etc.
 
"And then it all comes back to me"

CHORUS

I'm a crazy guy and I don't know why
But I feel as if I've been here before
The names have changed only I remain
It ain't a dream cause I've done this before



Just a thought as to an odd direction to go.
 
Sorry Garry, didn't mean to override your suggestion I didn't really see it until I posted my reply.
 
An idea...

Thanks for all the ideas. In fact keep'em comin'!!! Here's an idea I had for a chorus...
...One hell of a night​
we got into a fight
No,nothin' was right​
'cause she picked up a knife
She started to cry​
An' then I pulled it away[/INDENT]I said I pulled it away
And I stabbed her nearly 20 times :cool:​
 
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