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I really like this. I like the arrangement and the mix. I like the rough imperfection of the vocals. When it gets to the chorus, I think it would sound good with some harmonies.

That's a really good song. I love the "he's got seniority" lyric. I thought the mix sounded great, something for me to aspire to. I agree that the harmonies are the bomb here.

Thank you. I will try a de esser. I appreciate the help!

Nice lyrics! I didn't feel the beat behind the melody strongly enough. I feel like with blues you can play fast and loose with the beat, as long as you don't lose it all together. That's my main critique. Good work though!

Well it sounds good on my headphones although I know that's probably not too useful. My monitors have no low end whatsoever. This is so cool and trippy. Love it.

I added some strategic lisping. Didn't think anybody would notice!

Thanks RayC. MJBPhotos thanks for mentioning that again. I forgot. Listening to the chorus bass part as a whole, soloed, there are actually quite a few things I forgot to finish there!

I feel like this is close to being great. I think the song itself and the arrangement are good, I really liked the part at about 3:20 when it returned after the quiet bridge or whatever. The vocals are really good with some parts here and there that do need to be fixed. The guitar was really...

Here is the second version: https://soundcloud.com/jessicazin/all-land-is-one-land-take-2 It's really not that different. I changed panning and levels, and reduced the kick quite a bit in the chorus. Bunch of other minor changes... I experimented with taking out different tracks here and...

Yay I get to make my pitch for auto-tune. Then you could sing them the way you feel them and fix the pitch later. I use the flex pitch program that comes with Logic.

Really good song. Amazing vocals. When the harmonies say, "he cut you way too deep". There is something off in the timing, or possibly the consonants need to be cut a little with automation. Something there is distracting me. I really like the outro. Although I'd have a few less drum hits...

I hit play and then got distracted on my computer, and forgot I was supposed to be listening critically...I was really enjoying this song. Great rhythm overall. Now let me go back to the beginning of the song and be critical. The guitar chords at the beginning sound a little mushy (technical...

Wow, cool. I thought that was really interesting and entertaining. I have a comment about the timing. It bothered me that the vocals came back in at :14 when I really wanted them to come in at :13. It seemed like a beat too long of silence to me. Also the last set of oohs and aahs or whatever at...

mjbphotos: Thanks for the input. Yeah the heartbeat thing I like in theory, but there is something about it that doesn't sound good. heatmiser: "Nintendo haunted house music" sounds like a fantastic genre. I will work on the kick. I think I can't hear what other people are hearing. I miss my...

Chili: Thanks for your thoughts. I will mess with the vocals and not think I'm crazy if I keep them the way they are...I will definitely try reducing the reverb on the kick and some other things as well. That could go a long way towards improving this I suspect. You have spent much your life...

ido1957: So that's two votes to turn down the scanner vibrato on the main vocal. We sold the car to the next door neighbor which is a little weird. I keep trying to get into it. FoulPhil: I knew it couldn't be me, I need to buy all new equipment! Sike, I'm pretty sure it's my skills that are...

Wow I think this sounds fantastic, especially the vocals. Is it just me or are the drums and guitars out of sync a tiny bit in the intro? The vocals are so close to perfect that I'm going to get nitpicky: The words "lose my mind I'm sore" are a bit ahead of the beat where I think they should be...

Thanks Robus. I knew it was louder than my other songs but didn't think I needed to change that before posting. Interesting. Yeah there is a lot going on in the midrange. I will try to adjust.

Here is the second version: https://soundcloud.com/jessicazin/all-land-is-one-land-take-2 It's really not that different. I changed panning and levels, and reduced the kick quite a bit in the chorus. Bunch of other minor changes... I experimented with taking out different tracks here and...

I confess I haven't read through all the comments. Wanted to cast a quick vote against the falsetto. I think it would be better without it. I liked everything else.