Here's my late entry to this thread.
CORY! I know what you mean. I am having the same issues but perhaps on a smaller scale, since I have less equipment and my equipment isn't in need of such intense rehab.
I do, however, have a lot of work to do, and new issues keep coming up as I 'complete' my studio (is it ever complete?). For example, after spending three months planning my cabling, acquiring the supplies, spending nearly $1,000 on everything, and then finally making and installing the cables, I was ready to get rolling on new musical projects. Not to mention, I had to spend $800 on custom racks that would meet my needs and also fit into the space that I have available. When this didn't work out as planned, I became very discouraged and was at the end of my patience.
One thing that I have, which you don't, is copious amounts of spare time. I'm single with no kids, and I currently don't have a girlfriend/love interest. I tend to work six hours a day during the week, and I have a boss who thankfully supports me 100% in my off-hours projects. My friends also understand that this is what I love to do, and they understand that because of this I often don't feel like going out or meeting for lunch/coffee/drinks or whatever. Take this into consideration, because this is where our lives are different.
Anyway. As you have read in my recent posts, I'm making a lot of progress but I'm still managing a number of setbacks. Allow me to take inventory:
1. Cabling: I'm still working out the kinks in my cabling. If something doesn't work as expected, I have to ferret out the problem by tracing the signal path from origin to endpoint, pulling cables and testing with a multimeter. This is very frustrating when the take is ready to go and I just want to hit 'Record'. Thankfully, I'm only recording myself. Nobody else would put up with this.
2. Mixer: There's a ghost somewhere in this machine. I swear that a few line inputs aren't working correctly, but I don't have enough evidence to analyze, from which I could isolate the issue and work on a solution. And, since the cabling is still suspect, I can't be too sure whether it's the mixer or cabling, or perhaps another device.
3. The 48: I don't know what's going on here. Amp cards? Relays? Faulty noise reduction units? I'm going to do a full physical on the deck and see if the issue manifests itself in a concrete manner. Start from the top, working all the way down, taking notes and making decisions based on my limited experience and natural technical aptitude/intuition.
4. My second 34b: I had to replace the capstan flywheel assembly. It's installed. Play doesn't work well, so I ordered a new belt. I haven't installed the belt yet, but I am able to play a tape (not monitoring the output) for a brief period before it grinds to a near halt. FF and RW do the same thing, so it's not just the belt that's having problems. Remember, I bought this deck from someone who lived a block from the ocean and there was some corrosion in/on the deck. Plus, the the tension arm on the takeup side seems to stick, so this could cause other problems. This is basically a parts deck that I'm trying to bring back to full health, and I'm wondering if it's 'totaled' or if I should continue restoring it.
(By the way: When I wrote the paragraph above, my cat scooted across the floor on his butt. GREAT... now I have to take him to the vet and spend money on THAT, too??

)
5: Patchbays. I ran out of room on my four PB-64s. I might have to buy another patchbay. Also, I have this problem:
See that mess? Most of those patch cables are jumpers for the accessory send/receive jacks on all 20 channels PLUS the 8 busses. When I plug in the eight-track it adds 16 more cables; more if I'm using tape echo. I built the patchbay this way for a very specific reason: I'm making music which relies on TONS of tape effects and I need to have access to every input and output in order to achieve these effects. But, with 40+ patch cables plugged in, it's total albatross territory.
To solve this problem, I'm building something which most people would consider to be totally pointless. I'm building a 'normalling' RCA patchbay in a 2u project chassis, with the normals made using toggle switches. Closed circuit = jumpered, open circuit for patching to a device. I may also include sixteen additional ports to jumper my eight-track to channels 13-20, but I haven't decided.
This project will take maybe two weeks to complete but it will be SO worth it. I could just upgrade to TT patch bays but I'd be out another grand, at least.
6: My effects deck. A TEAC X-10R. It simply doesn't work, and I somehow broke it further when I tried fixing it. I'm dreading this project, but it needs to be done.
7: Recapping the PSU on my M-520. Not an onerous task, but something that will require great care and planning.
8: Aligning and calibrating
my MX5050 MkIII-2. This machine is way out of whack and I'm sure I'll have to spend an entire afternoon getting it right again.
9: I have run out of space in my bedroom, and I have a big bedroom. I'm looking at some office space this week, and although I'm willing to spend ~ $300/month to house my gear somewhere else, I'd really prefer not to. It's just a fact of life here, where housing is so expensive.
10: I'm sure there's more, but...
These are all fairly big roadblocks, but I have found a few ways to cope. One thing about myself is that I am a natural problem solver, and I get an immense amount of satisfaction from tackling seemingly insurmountable tasks. ... To be able to step back and look at what I've done and say to myself,
I did that, brings so much inner calm and happiness.
What's clear about you, Cory, through your interactions here is that you really, really enjoy these things, too. You love to fix things, and you care about these objects as if they were living, breathing creatures with souls. It's clear. And I feel the same way. It transcends simple work ethic, and it's more important to us than simply getting the job done. We work with our hands and with our minds, and our work satisfies our souls.
The key here is to not get lost, and to balance everything. It is also important to say "Enough!" and to reorganize priorities, even if it means putting all of these projects on hold for a week in order to pray/meditate/reunite with oneself and to strengthen bonds with loved ones. Even more, it is very important to acknowledge and accept that
this is who you are, this is what makes you happy, and the people you love will always understand this. They will understand as long as you make good on your other priorities and honor your commitments in other areas.
I totally understand the angst that comes with all of this, though, when thinking about how much you would rather be making music. It's fun turning wrenches and reading manuals but it's difficult when you just want to jump to the end point. If you give yourself finite, tangible goals, though, you can visualize what "success" means and you can work toward that. It gets closer each day that you work on one part of that plan. Imagine yourself spending most of your "music time" actually making and recording music instead of fixing things. Because THAT is why you are doing this, and it's going to be so much more rewarding when everything else is in its place.
To sum it all up... Enjoy what you are doing now, because you hopefully won't be doing it for too much longer. You love to repair and build, and to be an advanced amateur technician, so make the most of it while you're doing it. Take notes, post here, make a scrapbook, and give advice, because that is what you are good at and everyone here appreciates it so much. Your presence here is invaluable to so many people, and we all thank you very, very much for it. Keep a list of what needs to be done, and don't add to that list unless there are new, intermediate steps to accomplishing other items on that list. Take on no new projects, and don't be afraid to decline a request for help if it will take you on a long detour. Everybody here understands that you have enough on your plate and that you can't bear any more. So don't be afraid to say "No" to someone or something if it's going to get in the way of what you already have going on.
(Don't say No to the wife or kids, but I think you know that!

)
Anyway. I'm done writing for now. To put a cherry on it, I have to say that I really admire you for your dedication. I also really admire you for wanting to be the best husband and father that you can be. Having come from a broken, dysfunctional family myself, I really wish that I had someone like you around when I was a boy. You're doing a great job, dude, so
KEEP IT UP!!