I'll step back and let Light steer you away from nitro as well now, but before I do, donkeystyle who told you this?
It's rubbish. Not getting at you, it just it aint true.
As to the effect of a finish on an instrument. You are going to notice differences on acoustic instruments more than electrics and you can never really tell how much effect it has even then. As a rule you want as little as possible to give you a durable lasting protection to the wood. In the case of your first instrument go with whatever is easiest and keep it simple first time.
Having said that if any finish does kill the tone of your wood it would be polyester. I'm not to keen on the Urethane finishes I've seen either but on a first instrument thats not your biggest concern IMHO.