I like the tune
Constructive criticism:
-The lead vocal is way too far out in front. It sounds like the rest of the band is 20ft behind him.
-The guitar gets drowned out and is almost indistinguishable from the drum set through the entire song. Bring it forward so it sounds like it's supporting the singer.
-Do you have a bassist? It's muddy and gets lost with the guitar in with the drums. I sharper attack or using a pick would work. Can't tell if you use a DI or not, sounds like your mic'ing the bass cab though.
The drums sound really good probably due to the fact that you are used to hearing them from your point of view. If there is a way to play back the tracks of your drums and have the band play along with them with you standing in front of the lead singer, you'll kinda see what I'm talking about. Remember that you are mixing for the person that is not in your band, but is standing in the audience probably a good 10ft(3m) away. It's a different perspective.
This has potential, and I like the breaks. The song itself is a good one. Take comfort in the fact that your band can keep a good beat and maintain rythym. Hopefully more experienced people will reply also to provide you with exact adjustments that you can make. Sounds good for a garage mix, keep up the recording.
Dick