unborn baby song

N

ndxs

New member
I wrote this song to/ about my as yet to be born child when, early in the pregnancy, doctors told my wife and I that the her body was trying to miscarry the baby.
That's enuff to piss anybody off and being a person of faith, this is what came out later that night after thinking and praying about the situation.
Anyway, it's called "holding onto that heartbeat" since that's what I remembered the most about that visit to the doctor's office, the strong heartbeat on the monitor. It's whart I heard the loudest amidst all the words and bullcrap the doc was telling us. the heart beat.
hope I put the link in correctly
http://www.nowhereradio.com/artists/discography.php?aid=1401
any advice or input is appreciated. thanx
 
Download Link

My sympathies for your anxieties and my best wishes for the success of you and your wife's current pregnancy.

I am anxious to hear your song as I know it will be filled with that key element that makes great music, strong emotion, indeed you have really put a true life and death scenario that is currently happening to music, and that is supremely special.

If the will of the almighty is to take the child before your wife bears it, I am sure he will find a way for you to have many more.

Many of us are on dial-up accounts, slow connections.

Your song will not stream well at Lo-Fi with a slow connection and almost nobody is going to review you at Lo-Fi.

Please go back into your nowhere radio account and choose to make the song directly downloadable so we can right click the little arrow link and choose download.

The last of the little tiny arrow under the far right of the blue bar above your song is not a link, make the song downloadable and it will become a link.

God probably wants you to share this with us, at least I hope he does.
 
Member at nowhereradio.com

actually my bad, I'm signed up as a member so that link is s'posed to become active for me now, but that's good you changed the option ... now I can listen to the 'heartbeat'
 
You know this is an odd thing to say, but I could really stand to hear this song without the drums. They sound kind of... superimposed over the whole thing. They don't really fit stylistically and they don't sound up to the level of everything else, sound-quality-wise. At least, I'd like to hear the beginning without them. When they went away at 2:49 I thought "ah....". And when they came back in I went "ugh...".

Very heartfelt song. I'd like the music to support the song a little better.

Chris
 
Raw Emotion

I want to guess that this song just poured out of you like a torrent, and that seems to be what you are saying happened initially.

So the instrument parts are not really well defined maybe and what's happening structure wise in the song can be refined.

Write a click track for this and define the structure well.

The hook is great especially since I know the circumstances under which the song was written.

I certainly hear the expectant and proud father looking towards the birth of the child and holding that offspring close, and yearning for that contact, it is very touching.

"holding on to that heartbeat" is a great hook. Chorus and backup the vocals here with some harmonies as the mix develops session after session.

With some serious rehearsal on your part this could be a much better production of course and I hope you pursue that now, today, now. Don't lose the momentum and of course this is very good therapy for all of your anxieties. Just keep re-writing, re-recording and re-mixing.

Don't DARE erase or destroy this mix, because it is certainly filled with strong emotion and you and your wife, and your children will want to hear it one day.

Your voice sounds exhausted and hoarse. so just keep practicing and recording, re-writing and focusing on this song. Always keep a glass of room temperature water near you and take tiny sips and hold it in your mouth for as long as possible. Gargle very, very gently to clear your throat. Don't clear your throat strongly, that shocks the vocal chords.

You've planted a seed ya' know ...

I agree with Groucho, just forget the drums for now, use a metrognome, concentrate on these nice guitar sounds.

Practice the vocal part ... and then of course, mix the vocal up higher after the next session, becuase a lot of the words I cannot understand.

Remember you are so intamately familiar with the words, you could mix the vocal at a whisper and you would understand every word, because they are being yelled out in your head. But we ain't in there padnuh ...

We gotta hear those vocals and understand those words.

The guitar work is of course part of your emotional release and continue to utilize that raw emotion you are feeling now, but get the guitars under control, take a deep breath, and sing loud and clear.

I look forward to the next mix of this song, I really do. Use a click track. On the final mixes you can break away from the click track but practice recording with the click track for now.

Good job.
 
thanks for the replies folks. I appreciate the listen.

Groucho: My drum micing/ recording technique leaves a lot to be desired, I know. I was thinking maybe some reverb on the whole stereo drum tracks would help it find it's place in the mix. I'm not sure. Maybe it's just the style of drumming that isn't working for the song.

studioviols: that was a very intuitive critique there my friend. all pretty much right on the money too. Great listening skills. All good advice and I will pursue the refinement of this tune as per your suggestions. Thanks again.
 
I like your singing voice. Very resonant and expressive. I liked the introduction of the electric rhythm guit in the chorus. Pretty song. Very pretty.

The bass was nice, but probably brought in a little late in the song.

The harmony vocal parts could be just a bit tighter.

Some small pops at :52, :58, 2:17, 2:18, 2:34. A few more as well. Watch out for those.

Not sure about the vocals, but it seems like you might have been a bit too far from the mic. They have a little "distant" sound to them.

I think this is a real great start. Nice one.
 
thanx for the comments TripleM. The mic is a couple year old marshall condenser MXL 2001 maybe? not sure. kinda heavy on the midrange frequencies I think but I really have to hover around it a bit to find a sweet spot that sounds good with my voice.
I'm thinking of rerecording the vocals since I can't remove the pops (or don't know how).
thankyou for taking the time to listen.
 
Downloaded last night & listening on phones at work.

First I’ll tell you, this song really hit me hard. It made me think how fortunate I am that all went well with the birth of my, now, 3 year old daughter (with some complications). I was attached to her emotionally long before she was born. In fact, I would play games with her inside of mommy’s tummy (while mommy was sleeping :D) like tapping and feeling for the response back. I can’t imagine how I would have handled the news you got. That being said, I pray that everything goes well for you and your wife and child. Hang in there man.

Second, I should never come into a thread after Studioviols has hit it. He’s pretty thorough. Actually, I should. It helps me learn too :D

Knowing what the song was about really helped me frame it. I almost hate to mention it because I know this is such a personal song, but I think you have a jewel here. If I didn’t know what the song was about before I listened to it, I may not have figured out what it was about. I would love to especially hear the first verse set up the “heartbeat” theme better. But you know what, some songs are meant only for the writer to understand. If that’s what this song needs to be…so be it. Depends what you have in mind for the song. But like Studioviols said, this is a killer hook. There is a gem in this song for everyone somewhere. It’s already a gem for you and your wife I’m sure.

The mix is a bit on the muddy side to my ears, maybe lacking in the upper mids? I don’t really know…I’m still learning this stuff and I would agree with the drum comment. This song would sound awesome without any or minimal percussion.

Anyway, if you would allow me to indulge myself with a funny comment in this serious matter. Whenever I hear the opening chord progression that you use in this song, I can’t help but start singing to my self:

Can’t you see? Can’t you see?
What that woman been doing to me

:D

Very nice job man. This goes into my keepers folder purely for emotional content. Please keep us posted if you do any rewrites/remixes etc. I would like to keep up with this one.

Good work
 
Jagular, tha's great man, (the "can't you see" comment). That's the first thing I thought of when I listened back after doing the lead guitar parts. Oh well, I like that song too.
Thanks for the advice. I'm gonna keep working on it.
 
I agree with many of the previous comments. Great chorus...nice melody lines, bring up the vocals so WE can understand the lyrics... skip the drums, or replace with a better track.

Beautiful stuff. Stuff from the soul... usually the best.

for some reason, this is one of the nowhere accounts that "buffers" for me, and I can't stream it. It starts and stops too much to even listen to it. It seems to happen radomly among other accounts too. I therefore download the song, which in this case took about 10 minutes compared to the usual 35 seconds or so, it seems. And...this also happens with some other people, ..but then playing other songs on their list, it doesn't....or it's another day or something. I haven't a clue. I am using Windows media Player which I think Waldo kinda frowns on...but my computer doesn't choke on it like it does with winamp and the realplayer.(argh...realplayer)

anyway...good luck to you and your wife and your younger... Hopefully it'll work out in the end for the best. I can't imagine the kind of turmoil you must be experiencing with those kind of words from your doctor.
 
Nice...

Some out of sync stuff... kinda "sliding into the parts" at the beginning... as mixmkr says ;)

Snare has a really... unusual ambience to it... not unlike sitting (by itself) inside a 6 foot-tall bucket :)

Everything is tracked pretty cleanly... singing is really good. I must be insane... because half the people here sound like Jamal Buchet... lol... and that's not really a bad thing. :D ( ok... it USED to be, but that was then and-- ah... I-I've said too much ;))

Very pretty, and a good message.

Voice gets peaky during the louder, full-mix verse.... could use fader ride or compression... tho it sounds like you tracked the vox w/compression.

Nice bass sound... some crackles/rice krispies on the vocal track in the outro....

Nice job. Very pleasant track. Good luck & best wishes w/the baby. I'm going to follow in the future-tracks of my brother "G" and give

c w/a mellow 5 *****


Chad
 
so Chad...when did you get off MY shit list... and get on "YOUR" shitlist??

did I give you permission??;)
 
participant said:

Nice job. Very pleasant track. Good luck & best wishes w/the baby. I'm going to follow in the future-tracks of my brother "G" and give

c w/a mellow 5 *****


Chad
Click to expand...

:) ....Indeed, Chadly, ....indeed.

Hey Ndxs,
...Very nice heartbreaker youve got going here man. It sounds like youve got some great mix fixes to wade through, so im just gonna try to offer a little emotional support.
I just had a baby boy last may... ...our first. It was by far, the greatest experience i believe a man can ever go through. In our quest to have a baby however, my wife suffered through 4 miscarriages, followed by a baby born at 6 mos. that didnt make it. We were far beyond willing to try it again. We were both very heartbroken, and despite the doctors saying "just keep trying".... we both felt we couldnt go through that kind of pain any more. Well, we went on a vacation to visit family..... ..had a little "accident", and once again were stressing out over "another" pregnancy. I dont know if it was the vacation (Im a firm believer in "mind over body"), or just plain ole good luck and prayers....... .....but, Im happy to say that i go home from work each day to the prettiest face i have ever seen.
I certainly hope everything works out for you, your wife, and your future little one. Your tune hit home with me, so i guess i just wanted to share my experience w/ you, and let you know that i too have felt that pain. Good luck brutha
gw/5
 
I also wanted to wish you the best of luck. My wife and I have our first child on the way. We are down to 6 weeks now so I am pretty excited at this point. Thankfully we have had a smooth process so far, but you never know so the thoughts are scary.

G - that was a pretty scary but uplifting story there. I am sure your cardor is appreciated in ndsx's uncertain times. I know I was amazed by your story. I am very happy for how things ended up for you.

ndsx - I also wanted to say my wife and I are trying to write our unborn child song as well. It probably will not have this kind of tone as we have not experienced what you have, but a child can bring the emotions for sure.

As far as the song, I agree the hook is there. Others have covered some of the things to work on in the mix. The drums were cool. They just did not fit the tune. I look forward to a re-mix if you can. Good work!
 
I don't have the ears that others here do, so I'll only say I really really enjoyed the song and I think with just a little lighter touch - lighten up the drums and guitars just a bit - I think you have a winner.

The lyrics are beautiful, at least the ones I could make out. It gives me a lump in the throat. My wife is also expecting (it will be my FOURTH child, which I still can't believe). We also have a 14-month old, and I wrote a song for him before he was born. I tried to use the heartbeat from the sonogram in it, though I'm not sure it really worked.

I frankly like your song much better! And your voice is really nice. I think that's a vocal take you could "clean up" in software sufficiently to work.

I will pray for you and your family. Stay strong!

Fab
 
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