song writing practice for everyone!

U

UNIQNESS

New member
i'm a beginning song writer and i recently did an assignment which i have to change some words and make the piece still flow well. it's a very beginning technique that you learn as a song writer and i wanted to see what kind of creative ideas for rhymes everyone comes up with. i think it would be a good practice for those who are starting to write songs.

change the underlined words to other words. the rhymed words are bolded.

song: You're the Top! (1934) by Cole Porter

You're the top! You're the Coliseum.
You're the top! You're the Louvre Museum.
You're the melody from symphony by strauss.
You're a Bendel bonnet.
A Shakespeare sonnet. You are Mickey Mouse!

You're the Nile! You're the Tow'r of Pisa.
You're the smile on the Mona Lisa.
I'm a worthless check, a total wreck, a flop!
But if baby I'm the bottom, you're the top!
 
whoa. This is...uh...like work. I think I might be too bussed for this assignment. That, and I don't get it. Well, sorta. But not so much that I can justify trying to...what was I saying?

Oh shit - that didn't rhyme.
 
UNIQNESS said:
i'm a beginning song writer and i recently did an assignment which i have to change some words and make the piece still flow well. it's a very beginning technique that you learn as a song writer and i wanted to see what kind of creative ideas for rhymes everyone comes up with. i think it would be a good practice for those who are starting to write songs.

change the underlined words to other words. the rhymed words are bolded.

song: You're the Top! (1934) by Cole Porter

You're the top! You're the Coliseum.
You're the top! You're the Louvre Museum.
You're the melody from symphony by strauss.
You're a Bendel bonnet.
A Shakespeare sonnet. You are Mickey Mouse!

You're the Nile! You're the Tow'r of Pisa.
You're the smile on the Mona Lisa.
I'm a worthless check, a total wreck, a flop!
But if baby I'm the bottom, you're the top!
Click to expand...
Changing Cole Porter is like changing Shakespeare. There are people who would shoot you for it. Others, of course, think he was a hack and would like to shoot him. I always thought his lyrics and melodies were catchy, but not profound. Seems like this would be a fun exercise in a class setting, thankfully I don't have to do it.

That said, The Dick Van Dyke Show had an episode where they changed this very song. Young son Richie, singing to his mom, Laura Petrie, changed the line to "You're the smile on the Mommy Lisa." It worked coming from a cute kid--would not have worked for the song for Cole Porter, would not have worked if the song (and the painting) were not already famous.

But again, as an exercise, I can see its value....
 
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