Poor Little Saturday - this time an original

cygnus

cygnus

New member
The last few songs that I had posted in this forum were cover tunes. I figured it was finally time for some original music. This one was written back in 1995 by the bassist in our band. Me and the drummer thought it could use a face lift and some 21st century production. So we re-recorded it and brought in a female vocalist, which I think the original needed.
This was all done using a Tascam 2488NEO and a digitech S100 for the reverb, and mastered using Ableton Live with Ozone5. So here it is:

SoundClick artist: Allison's Engine - page with MP3 music downloads

Please keep in mind that this is a mp3. The CD quality sounds so much better.
Thanks for listening
Cheers:guitar:
 
I love all the elements of this song and the singing is great, but it somehow doesn't gel as a whole. I find the guitars a spread in quite a pleasing way, but are really too wide and seem to be coming at me from the sides and aren't supporting the singer enough. Also this feels like it should be a 3 minute song and could get to the point much faster.

Perhaps it's just the "days of the week" subject matter, but it reminded me of this, which isn't a bad reference for the style...
Bangles Manic Monday - YouTube
 
Not a fan of the vocalists performance. It's not as smooth/stylized as I think it could be. Could be the song is moving too fast to allow her time to deliver the words and hold the notes. If this was slowed 20-30 bpm she'd be able to vamp and diva on it more, which is really what it needs (think 10,000 maniacs/cowboy junkies, slowmo folk rock). She's the lead instrument on this and the song should be written around her strengths. Slower tempo would also fit the lyrics better IMO.

I don't care for the flange effect at 2:40 (happens again later in the song). I thought something was wrong with the recording when it first started to happen, then realized it was probably for effect. It's just unnecessary(?). Not sure what it adds musically or reinforces in the lyrical content.

The recording is neutral, sounds clean and I could hear everything.

[I've probably added more to my feedback than is customary, please take it with a grain of salt]
 
Agree about the flange, but I like this song the more I listen to it (strange that)... I think it is a solid pop song that wants to consolidate and condense it's strengths rather than become a diva wank.
 
I like the song and the singer - it reminds me of a folk-rock band from long ago that I used to love, Spanky and Our Gang, or maybe another great band, The Seekers.

I agree that the Flange effect is distracting, because it doesn't really mesh with the lyrics (for example, it would work if the lyrics mentioned "falling" or something like that.) Although, on listening to the song again, there is something I like about that section - it rocks! Maybe try using that effect (more subtly) throughout the song, to give it a rockier feel - the rest of the recording sounds a bit too "squeaky clean" for my taste.

I would make the vocal louder (but I always say that.) The acoustic guitars are nice at first, but after a while I felt like saying, "Back off and let the singer take the spotlight for a while!"

I suspect that a one-minute intro is an indulgence that few listeners will sit through. I think a 10 second intro would be perfect. If you cherish the atmospheric bass and guitar jam too much to drop it (it is nice), then maybe put it at the end of the song so listeners have the option of settling in or tuning out.
 
Thank you for the critiques and compliments. I have to say I did have second thoughts on the flange effect. I tried so many variations and couln't get it quite right so I settled on something I wasn't very proud of. I had a feeling the intro would be too long too. I've got to be selfish on this one though because I really like the slow fade in. The vocal track was sort of plopped in at the last minute and wasn't really figured in during the initial stages of recording. We were farming out the vocals. This song was written years ago and thought it might sound better this time around if sung by a female. I do think her singing style and tone do fit in well with this song. It was too bad I didn't bring her in earlier on the project. I probably would have changed the key as well. Some of those high notes were a struggle. I too hear that some parts of the vocal track do sound a little bit rushed as well.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top