Parents

grimtraveller

grimtraveller

If only for a moment.....
Are there things that your parents taught you while growing up that you have clung to and adopted as you've progressed and are there things they taught you that you have wholesale rejected ? Are there things you wholesale rejected but found yourself coming back to as you got older ?
 
I'm an orphan too, these days. I would say watching my dad doing all kinds of DIY, as I know how to do those things now.
I'm amazed seeing other people without a clue.
 
As a white kid growing up in Orange County, CA - my parents inadvertently taught me to not harbor racist, bigoted, or skin color stereotypes or attitudes by pretty much not talking about racism at all. I simply did not know that racism was a thing until I got a little older and started to understand it through the lens of education and popular culture. "Roots" really blew my hair back as a little kid. I just didn't know. We learn things incrementally. But the point is.... those attitudes were simply non-existent in my day to day life. I can't remember exactly when it was.... I was probably 9 or 10 - and I asked my dad about that subject one day after it occurred to me that this was a thing and I remember he looked right at me and said: "Son, you need to take one person at a time".

Anyway - that's the first thing that came to mind when I read your post.
 
Good topic..

Growing up in La la land...Yep be color blind and be honest to a fault. Be grateful for what you have... and ......when the going gets rough there's this Higher Powered entity that's there to tap into if you so choose to do so. It has worked pretty well for me through out life.
 
I grew up outside of DC - my parents never talked about color or race - practice honestly without preaching it - my Dad was DIY Radio guy so I learned a lot from him - my Mom was a concert pianist then homemaker - I learned a ton of musical things from her - I don't have a bigoted/racist bone in my body - but I was never taught it - just by example by the way my parents treated everyone - all the same - didn't have a star struck thing about anyone - but enjoyed all the starts.
 
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My dad told me that if I always work 5% harder than my coworkers I would always have a job. He's been right so far. That helped. And I'm not sure if this helped or hurt but from the time I started partying at 15 years old he told me he didn't care how hard I partied or what I did, I WILL be going to school and work the next morning. I turned into a functioning addict and alcoholic but I never lost a job.
 
grimtraveller said:
Are there things that your parents taught you while growing up that you have clung to and adopted as you've progressed and are there things they taught you that you have wholesale rejected ? Are there things you wholesale rejected but found yourself coming back to as you got older ?
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My father taught me to treat others as you wish to be treated yourself
 
Smithers XKR said:
My Father taught me to always support the underdog and stand up for those who have nothing.
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My Father taught me always stand up for what you believe is right and fair in life, even if that will leave you in a worse situation.

I have binned that now. Fairness and justice have no place in getting on in this world, it is all about screw everyone else and feather your own nest and sod the rest.
 
ez_willis said:
My dad told me that if I always work 5% harder than my coworkers I would always have a job. He's been right so far. That helped. And I'm not sure if this helped or hurt but from the time I started partying at 15 years old he told me he didn't care how hard I partied or what I did, I WILL be going to school and work the next morning. I turned into a functioning addict and alcoholic but I never lost a job.
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You have insulted me EZ and got angry with me.... I do not know why? If you are trully sober then maybe you should say something like... Smithers is an addict and he needs to get clean and see forgiveness. I always was understanding of your difficult background and had sympathy and understanding, but you really have upset me. But you called me a shitbird... that is a horrible thing to say for someone that just has opposing views. Please really read my comments and you may see that there is nothing contreversial about what I actually say in essence.
Thank you
 
Yes and yes. Experience is a bitch, so there is a lot of things that you cannot be "taught". On a side note there are also things that worked for my parents that as much seems nice wouldn't work for me, because my they had a whole different existence, other beliefs and lived in another time. I think that is very hard to trace a parallel between different generations. Currently I can realize that several rules I use for a good living may not work for my nephews and people of their age (I don't have kids). The world changes so quickly.
 
Actually I lied. I am not an orphan. One thing my parents taught me when I was younger and I still adhere to, never talk about politics or religion
in public. It has worked well for me over the years. Don't believe me, Im a liar.
 
I used to work with a guy who's only verbal communication was political. He would glom onto any nearby body and pummel them with questions and opinions. I refused to engage, I would immediately respond with something, anything other than politics. He finally got the message.. took him several months, but he made it.
 
YanKleber said:
On a side note there are also things that worked for my parents that as much seems nice wouldn't work for me, because my they had a whole different existence, other beliefs and lived in another time
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Do you feel that there is anything that hasn't changed from their time to yours or never changes ?
 
Look both ways, twice, before you cross the street, and don't run, walk.

As a kid I understood the look twice part, the walk don't run I understood in time, both applicable throughout life's journey.
 
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grimtraveller said:
Do you feel that there is anything that hasn't changed from their time to yours or never changes ?
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I think that being honest and not doing to others what you wouldn't like that others do to you is something that will never change in terms of having a good existence. From my point of view. I have seen a lot of people going the wrong way though. But I think that it always was like this, maybe I just didn't pay too much attention before IDK.
 
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