So, I liked the vocal where it sat, honestly, but yeah, the lead vocal could use some editing to clean up those little annoyances, and a bit of pitch work right where it does that little slide at the start of the chorus (IIRC).
That rhythm guitar backbeat could be used a little more, I don't know, artfully, I guess. It's there right at the start and goes on and on.
Biggest problem for me was there's really a few parts where it just kind of crumbles rhythmically, both with syncs of the background vocals - which you should be able to clean up with a little work, but when it does those reprises toward the end 3:15+ it's way too loose IMO. And, it goes on much longer than it needs to for me - seems like it did for you too, the way it ended!
With all that, I'd like to hear it tightened up and shortened. It's a pretty little song.