In need of sincere feedback on my first serious tune

H

Hugo Huijer

New member
Hi all.

I'm kind of new to this forum. Had a little break in recording, but now trying to start again.

This song is the first result, and I'm really curious to know what others think about it, both audio and song-wise. Bands like Radiohead, Pink Floyd, Fleet Foxes are a big influence to me, and I think it's noticeable on this song.

I recorded it in my home "studio". I'm by no means a great recorder. I certainly don't know the ins and outs of this profession, and am just a newbie.

Please share your opinions with me!

Cheers!

https://soundcloud.com/hugo-huijer/small-lapse-of-silence
 
The acoustic guitar is very indistinct, too much room or reverb, or just not recorded well. The synth background is probably too loud in the mix leading into each vocal part, as the song gives the impression of fading down each time the synths fade away. Vocal needs to come forward a little in many places. At the end as the other instruments fade, there is a cymbal crash that should be deleted. You're doing good for a 'newbie' mixer, but I think you need to work on finding a sonic space for each instrument (EQ, panning).
 
Hey Hugo, I thought the ambient sounds were a bit overpowering at times. The guitar leads were a bit on the high side to me too. Vocal was a bit harsh and sibilant in a few spots. Very verby and spacey, and i guess panning and separation lose a lot of meaning with that much reverb, but i don't mind that feel, and enjoyed listening.
 
Hi guys, Thanks for this feedback so far! It's helping me tons!

I did some work on the mix now.

- I re-recorded the acoustic guitar. It indeed sounded really boxy, without much detail. Used a different room setup and mic placement and the difference is huge imo. I think it's a lot better now, so thanks a lot.

- I lowered some of the ambient sounds during the intro. In combination with the new acoustics, this caused the acoustics to be more of the centerpiece, instead of these ambient sounds. The overall atmosphere is the same though, which I like (the dreamy, calm vibe). Overall, it sounds a lot more balanced this way imo.

- Saturized the drums a bit to give them more presence during the chorusses. Gives them some more weight lol. I liked it better this way.

- I will redo some parts of the vocals, and probably use some de-essing to clear some annoying highs, which makes it sound too crispy(?).

I'll post a new mix over the weekend hopefully, and will continue working on it! Thanks for the feedback so far!

About the cymbal crash at the end: I think it's subjective, and every person would have a different opinion. It's not right or wrong persee, right? What makes you say the cymbal crash should be deleted, other that personal preferences? Is there an audio-technical reason for this? I really like that cymbal crash lol. ;)

Anyway, thanks a lot for the feedback so far
 
All the musical elements are there. I like the song and its movement. Great harmonies!

But the mixing is a bit wayward.

I understand that you are going for a spacey ambient sound, which is fine. However there is room for subtlety,

The atmospheric synth needs to be atmospheric, i.e. very much more in the background.

Assorted delays and reverbs are sounding more gimmicky than musical. Pull them back so that they are almost not there.

There is some percussion which is swallowed up by everything.

Something worth trying is getting the sounds right at the back of the song where everything is, and let the front look after itself.
 
That pad sound out back is eating up frequencies in both the guitar and vocal. If you can manage better separation via complementary EQ, maybe look for a different pad sample, one that's simpler and less rich frequency-wise. You could simply turn it down a bit too. Also, why did you pan the synth pad right? Why not balance it across the stereo field?
 
The ambient sounds were too loud at the beginning. The acoustic guitar was gettind drowned out to the point where it had no warmth.
 
Hi guys, sorry that I haven't replied for a while. It has been a busy month..

Found some time to work on the tune again, and I'm loving all the feedback.

New version: https://soundcloud.com/hugo-huijer/small-lapse-of-silence-1


Re-recorded the entire acoustics. Remixed a few parts. Saturized the drums a bit, and did some tweaking to the bass. In my opinion, it has already improved. It is still unfinished, but I would like to know if you guys agree whether it has improved or not. :)

Thanks a lot and merry christmas!
 
Good opening soundscape. Could use a little more separation (some more panning between parts) to make it a little more engaging, but less in volume to keep it spacey. Nice voice. Good mix. The guitar about 1:35 comes very forefront and almost too loud.
Like your lead tones.
 
Second mix: Great song. a little more movement, like I'd expect in this kind of song. The guitar center and the new pad blend is nice, but it's kind of right side oriented. Possibly, just for the intro, you could pan it back and forth (slowly)? Make that spacey sound a bit more spacey. Like this mix much better. The acoustic is better (very pleasant) and doesn't overbear in the middle anymore. Some of the lead notes could ping pong (Play center then reverby echo on one side then the other). This type of song deserves a lot of movement.
 
Merry Christmas!

I didn't listen to the first mix yet.

I would say that the synth is burying the mix IMO. I would use that more as background. It is masking the other instruments.

Kick drum has no power and I would like to hear that.

It's at 4 min that I hear the solo come in too loud. It may not be so obvious if the rest was not so washed out by the synth and the drums had some girth.

The song is awesome. I just feel the drums need to be a bit more up front. Sounds washed out with effects and synth to me.
 
Really nice, Hugo. A beautiful song. I feel that more could be made of the percussion when it finally fades in, both in interest and in the wideness of the panning. Some crisp ride pings or shaker parts hard-panned are a great way of adding space to a very dense mix.
 
First mix had better kick. Vocals also have a 'ch' thing going on in the upper mids that is harsh now. De-ess that stuff!

Again, great song. It just sounds washed out and not smooth and balanced like the tune deserves.
 
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