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Thread: My mother passed six months ago.

  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by 60's guy View Post
    Chili, I appreciate reading your words, and the sharing of your own experience.
    I appreciate you giving us the venue to post. Thnx. My condolences for your Ma.

    Quote Originally Posted by miroslav View Post
    So you're saying that as though it has yet to happen...?
    I concede nothing.

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    If there was ever an upside to my Mom's dementia....it would have to be that she simply focused on the here and now.

    My brother committed suicide 40 years ago. My dad died 13 months later. She was heart broken and she dwelled on it for 30 years.

    And then, as if by magic, or by the grace of (who knows), God?....a degree of dementia helped her to not remember tragic moments.

    Albeit that she couldn't always remember the names of her grand children....she never forgot my name or my sister's names....ever.

    Once again, I appreciate the sharing of stories.

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  4. #13
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    Just saw this...Sorry my brother. Lost my Mom 8 years ago...seems like yesterday...just a few days short of 93 and luckily she had a sharp mind right to the end. Awesome that she was able to remember you to the end..Dementia and Oldtimers suck. Sweet lyrics to the tune you wrote for her....Post the tune bro! Love n hugs to you my generous Jamfest hat giving friend
    Tomco Audio Electric ( TAE )

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  5. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by TAE View Post
    Just saw this...Sorry my brother. Lost my Mom 8 years ago...seems like yesterday...just a few days short of 93 and luckily she had a sharp mind right to the end. Awesome that she was able to remember you to the end..Dementia and Oldtimers suck. Sweet lyrics to the tune you wrote for her....Post the tune bro! Love n hugs to you my generous Jamfest hat giving friend
    Sorry to read that you lost your mom years ago. There's a special place in the heart of every man for his mom. That is one thing that all men share in common with each other.

    About those lyrics....I mentioned in another thread that I wrote the lyrics to the music of Les Dudek's song "Behind The Mask".

    Actually, if you listen to "Behind The Mask"...disregard his lyrics....read/hear my lyrics in concert it'll be syllable for syllable in phrasing.

    There is no way....ever....that I would record my lyrics to his music. I used his music as a vehicle to write personal lyrics about the fear of death that my mom always had.

    Admittedly, or not, we are all fearful.

    On the last few hours of my mom's life.....we...son, daughters, granddaughters, grandsons, son's in law, nieces, and nephews took turns holding her hand for the last time.

    My mother hadn't been awake for hours.

    And then, all of a sudden, when my cousin was holding her hand, my Mother suddenly awoke and raised her arms up and said "It's beautiful". She said it once again....and then she was gone.

    "It's beautiful" were the last two words she spoke.

    I have no clue what it was she may have seen at the last moment of her life, but I am thankful that.....whatever it was she may have seen....she was content and at peace.

    My goal now, is to perhaps write a new song using the words.."It's beautiful".

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  7. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by 60's guy View Post
    On the last few hours of my mom's life.....we...son, daughters, granddaughters, grandsons, son's in law, nieces, and nephews took turns holding her hand for the last time.

    My mother hadn't been awake for hours.

    And then, all of a sudden, when my cousin was holding her hand, my Mother suddenly awoke and raised her arms up and said "It's beautiful". She said it once again....and then she was gone.

    "It's beautiful" were the last two words she spoke.
    We are stardust, we are golden, we are billion year old carbon and we got to get ourselves back to the garden.

    Man that is an awesome "beautiful" adios story...what a gift to your family. Thanks for sharing that.

    The last few days of my Mom's life were torturous for my 4 siblings and myself. She was totally mentally solid when we all kissed her good luck as she went into surgery that last time. When they opened her up the doctors realized that there was no saving her, the cancer was everywhere so they closed her up and opted to keep her in an induced coma until she passed. It took about 4 days for her to pass...It took it's toll but in the big picture pretty fast.......my heart goes out to the millions of families that have to sit and watch for weeks, months, years watching a loved one noncommunicable lying there in a bed waiting for the end...sad shit.

    One thing she kept doing was reaching out like she was trying to get to someone or something..several times she called out mama.

    The nurses said it was a very common occurrence..

    My Mom had no fear of death and actually was kind of looking forward to the next phase. She was a hardcore practicing Catholic but on what happens after this thing she was dubious as to what is next...she felt reincarnation was a real possibility....Often asking the question "Why am I still here?" All but one of her 11 siblings had passed, all but a handful of her life long friends..I'd tell her because we still need you here...She never realized how much her kids as adults still relied on her wisdom. She was our go to when the shit hit the fan.

    Having faced the fact that I may or may not get to hang around a whole lot more due to the aggressive skin cancers I have been fighting I am at peace with dying...but I am surely in no rush and am hopeful I can win the small battle and get maybe 15 / 20 or so more years without having to put my loved ones through a lot of heartache in doing so. Have 6 grand kids I'd like to watch grow up...doing everything I can to hang around.

    I was about 7 when I lost my first loved one..an awesome Uncle
    Man it sucked on so many levels...had a cousin ( his son ) a few years older than me that was just wiped out over it..
    A year or so later a good friend of my parents was killed in an auto accident and my obsession with death and what comes next began....

    I went to Catholic school for a good portion of my elementary education..@ 9 in class one day I asked a nun the big one. Where did God come from? Quickly she answered God has always been and always will be....No, I came back how does something come from nothing? Damn I gotta shut this kid up...That Thomas is what we call the "divine mystery", it is beyond our capacity to know or understand....fueling that obsession with how this all came to be and where it is all going.....and now almost 60 years later ...still clueless other than accepting this is some kind of dream within a dream...There is far more going on within this dream than we are capable of fathoming and this whole deal is just a blink in what we conceive is eternity. An undefinable "experience". We are all part of this miracle and we are each miracles in motion.


    I wrote this little diddly and tune to go with it several years ago...

    Death is the soldier standing guard
    Over the mystery of life and no matter how hard, we try
    We don't get to know what's going on
    Though we'd really really like to know
    Oh........what's going on?
    Please tell me, please tell me cause I would really really like to know.
    Last edited by TAE; 2 Weeks Ago at 05:38.
    Tomco Audio Electric ( TAE )

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    "The secret to a long life is to live a long time" .... "You can quote me on that" TAE

  8. #16
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    Sincere condolences, brother.
    Cats land on their feet. Toast lands jellyside down.

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