Do these lyrics work for you?

drstawl

drstawl

Banned
Use the music to Tool's Track 5 on Lateralus.

Got spills to Tame
Every Day

Vacuum the Lake
The Amerikan Way

Got Prills to Weigh
Then Throw Away.

Follow the Rules
It’s a Brand New Day.

Chorus:

{He dished the ducks
From trucks.
And any bottle
Of wine he served
Didn’t suck.
He did this
Long before these
Upstart Fucks.}

Ignore the Facts
If you want to
Get the Max.

Ignore the Specs
If you want to
Get free sex.

Feel free to use your
Staff as Pucks.

They're Shmucks!

And give them all the
Aw Shucks.

Just Ask Tex.

You might be up next.
Just bend over.
What the heck?

Chorus:
 
hi doc
howdy?
been away from this board for long
but improve a lot
yes i like your lyric
but have to find the music to hear again
i also have lot of lyric problem ,will post here soon
cheers
istyle
 
i hope theres alot of loud power chords and the vocalist doent annunciate everything (i wont work for sinatra) but it is ok for a hard rock song.
 
She's speechless!

The song is about a small-time captain of industry that made it big in the late '60's and early '70's finishing parts for helicopters that were being shot down almost as fast as they were building them. This was the heyday of the $600 toilet seat, way before that phrase caught on. The money warped his little Texas brain to the point that he thought he was a god like those worshipped by the native population of the areas between Texas and Peru.
He's no longer with us so there's noone left to hate.
The company he started rolls on.
Others have stepped up to the plate to try to fill his 10-gallon hat but they're just pale upstart imitators.
The real lesson is having a business with a captive market that doesn't give a shit what they pay for a specific service.
This is good country!
The parallels between this movie and Schindler's List are eery.

darrin: You're very right about the power chords. That was the inspiration for the lyrics. I disagree about the vocal presence.
The singer has to get this uncomfortably in-your-face intelligible.
 
poem,lyrics,

I was thinking about my problem that i faced with your poem so i decided to ask it hear. i am a songwrtiter but up to now i have worked in my mother language which is not english ,but i am thinking about writing a song in english , i have no problem about the syllabus in english and caring about the rythm of lyrics but my vocabulary is limited so i decided to work on someone else poem.does anybody there know anybody who can help me ?
my style of working is rock mixed with ethnic themes U can imagine s.th like Queen works (innuendo,mostafa,....)and some of sting works.and my favorite subjects are social problems, real love,philosophy of life,politics.
 
Dr-

Your story about the song was great. The lyrics were like in code. IMHO, song lyrics have to be more obvious than other poetry. I would rethink and make it twice as plain and simple as you think appropriate.

I have a similar tendency, BTW.
 
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