First Time I sing In English, need your opinion.

A

AmirMaor

New member
Hi All,
I have a new song in English that i'll really like that Native English speaker people will hear it and tell me how bad (if so) is my accent.

+ I'll be happy to here about my video production in the clip :)

The song:


Lyrics:
All she said you and me
All she said meant to be
All she gave me reason to bealive
When she said she will never live

Where are you now
What are you doing to me
Where are you now

All she said hold me tiet
When we stay up all night
All she said trust in me
All I have Is what she said to me

Where are you now
What are you doing to me
Where are you now

The wind you feel I feel it to
The sky you see Is not just for you
We are on the same road Don't turn your head away
Maybe some day....

Where are you now
What are you doing to me
Where are you now

TNX :)
 
For what it is worth, I hear an accent, but that doesn't make it bad. Sounded pretty good to me. The thing about English, the ability for the language to handle accents are really its strength.

Sounded like Eastern European (just a guess), Romania, Hungry, somewhere in that area.

Production sounded good, singing sounded good. Accent was not bad, there, but not where you couldn't clearly understand the words. Probably better than most native speakers.
 
I agree with David. No problems understanding.

I like the video production, although it gets a little monotonous by the end.

You could possibly use some help from an English speaking producer to help with emphasizing the 'hook' on this. It seems to get lost in things. The words may need a slightly different emphasis to give them the correct impact.

This is much better than I could ever do and I am judging it by a much higher standard than I am capable of, but I wanted to give you an honest opinion.

Glen
 
Tnx for all comments, it means alot to me.

DM60 -- your guess is very wrong :), I'm from Israel, my accent sound middle east I think... but i'm not sure., any why tnx alot about the over rated comment :).

ido1957 - I will listen to "99 Red Balloons", see what they got there, here 99FM is a totally mainstream station :)

gcolbert - I'm happy that you give me honest opinion, that why i'm here, I know that I have an accent, what interesting me more is how the accent sound, it could be good or special or..., like(strage example) arnold schwarzenegger - i think part of his magic mast be with his weird talk...

Tnx again :)
 
I try to change the singing, I think what I have here is my best... :) every time I try again it sound really bad :)

Tnx for all the help here
 
I enjoyed the song, and it kept me engaged for its duration, which is rare for me these days. There is a bit of looseness about the singing, but it doesn't worry me. It reminds me a bit of early Bowie.

You have an accent that comes through more strongly from time to time. This is not something to hide . . . it's something that adds character and interest. I like the influences you bring to the music that give it a different flavour to typical western music.

Well done!
 
Ido1957 - I ttried couple of times, I think i'll live it like this, It's very hard to change the accent and some say it's even better that i have that, more unique :)

gecko zzed - Thank you for the comment - "early Bowie" - I doubt it :)

Tnx for all the comments :)
 
Nothing at all wrong with your accent. I only meant to comment on emphasizing some of the words differently. This is such a subtle difference that you may need someone else to help with it. Possibly someone with some experience as a vocals trainer/producer can step in and help you out here.

Glen
 
Tnx for the comments, It help me really much, I try to make my accent less noticeable but I think it's not working so I'll live it like it is now.

Thanks Again :)
 
Hey it sounds really good. Really professional. I wouldn't worry about the accent at all. One of my favorite songwriters, St. Thomas, before he sadly passed away, sang with a broad accent and I think that really works. There is no need in trying to sound native at all IMO.

Great job!
 
Accent is fine.
It's rarely the accent that causes a problem, more the phrasing and emphasis as we have different structure and grammar etc. Syntax can be the hardest part of English to come to grips with.
Arrangement is fine, performances are OK and the vocal works well enough but tehre are some some very pronounced SS es for SSSSHE in the beginning - you should tame them if possible.
Vid was OK. Overall the mix sound a bit too trebly - verging on brittle with some instruments.
It's worth continuing to work on.
 
AmirMaor said:
Hi All,
I have a new song in English that i'll really like that Native English speaker people will hear it and tell me how bad (if so) is my accent.

+ I'll be happy to here about my video production in the clip :)

The song:


Lyrics:
All she said you and me
All she said meant to be
All she gave me reason to bealive
When she said she will never live

Where are you now
What are you doing to me
Where are you now

All she said hold me tiet
When we stay up all night
All she said trust in me
All I have Is what she said to me

Where are you now
What are you doing to me
Where are you now

The wind you feel I feel it to
The sky you see Is not just for you
We are on the same road Don't turn your head away
Maybe some day....

Where are you now
What are you doing to me
Where are you now

TNX :)
Click to expand...


You and I are in the same boat.
I’m trying to write in English too but lack of knowledge and bad accent forces me to hire other to sing my songs.
Anyway, I like what you did. I can hear accent too but nothing to worry about.
If I tried to guess I would say you were from Turkey or from some Arab state.
But as I said you did a great job. Not problem to understand.
I think you made a few spelling mistakes in your lyrics. You can correct them if you agree with me.
You sang “leave”, lyrics say “live”
I understood you singing I feel too, lyrics say “I feel to”

Hold me tiet should be Hold me tight (I think)

sikter
 
I agree with the other ones about the language. I can't really judge anyway since I'm not an english native speaker...
The video is cool! Loved all the color correction you did, the results were pretty natural. Also the editing is fine. Personally I'm not a fan of 100% slow-mo videos but it works. Are you going to do another edit or is it the final version?
 
Hi, sorry it take me time to respond :)

Tnx for all the comment, it help me allot (now that want to start working on my new English song)

I think I'll live this song as it is.

Tnx again
 
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