Your Name............Please Critique This One!

Mornin' Forum :)

I'm gonna' be one the road more or less for a month on a gig that I just signed on for and I won't be posting any new material up for a little while-gonna' be busy. That's a good thing. Working doing what you love-playing music, well it doesn't get much better than that. Anyway.................

I had been working on this song for awhile. I wrote it for my wife of 20 years, Renee and to tell you the truth, it took 20 years to get it right. I gave it to her as a Valentine's Day gift. (The best Valentine's Day we've ever had) I just wanted to share this song with the forum and as usual, please voice comments. I am really listening to everything you guys suggest and I hope improvements can be heard in each subsequent recording.

The song is called, "Your Name............" and I think it's the best thing I've done to date. Please take a listen and tell me what you think...again. And if you've ever been with anyone for awhile, you will truly understand the words and the sentiment.


www.soundclick.com/bands/2/musicallymrmmusic.htm

Click on the link to "Your Name......."
 
It's a pretty nice song. There's a cymbal that kinda sticks out. About 10 seconds and again at 49 seconds. (maybe same sample at later parts in the song too). It's not a very good sounding cymbal in my opinion.

I think the vocal would be better with less effects on it, and a little more to the front.

Good guitar playing. I think the song needs a bridge in it that you cycle through a couple of times. Something that starts with the 4th of the key and moves a long for about 8 measures.... with a different chord progression and melody.

Take all this with the understanding that I'm just another musician, with just another opinion.

Nice job... !
 
Thanks KJamm. From one musician to another, your comments are the ones I give the most validity to. I've been told that the song needs some harmonies. What type of harmony is needed? Something "blocked" or something more "fugal" in nature? Something more 4 part or more focused like a tenor choir type harmony, etc. Looking for suggestions. Thanks for the listen! :)
 
I just listened to it again. You know... what I would do is this.... I'd pick out about 3 lines during the verse that you could sing harmony with... I mean influential lines. (I think I could tell you which lines need the emphasis) Then on the chorus I'd find a gal that is part soprano and part alto who can go in and out of harmony and unison. Soft airy voice that compliments yours. I think that would be pretty cool. And if you could get her to do a few ooohhh ahhhs during the guitar part. Just a few tastefully parts. That would work well.

I know a lady that could do it really well.

That's what I'd do for vocals. But it sounds pretty darn good as it is.
 
I'm assuming that it's the MP3 encoding (It's sounds pretty swishy and sort of on the muddy side), but it sounds like there's a pretty cool mix in there.

Agreed on the cymbal... Almost sounds like a hi-hat cymbal on a stand... If you could keep it less "out front" it would be cool...

Holy cow! Whole mix just changed on a dime at around 3:10... Got really compressed... Gotta play that part again... Yup - It's there... Something suddenly bypassed on the drum buss perhaps?

Nice tune... I especially like the "not going back to the root chord" thing at the end... That's the kind of thing that stands out.

John Scrip - www.massivemastering.com
 
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