Please listen and critique my songs

L

leahkim

New member
Hi everyone - I've been a long time reader and listener to this forum, and I finally put some songs up to be listened to and critiqued.

They are at www.mp3.com/mikhael_ser

One is an acoustic guitar and piano instrumental (guitar recorded with Studio Projects C1 mic and piano sound is from Roland JV-1010).

The other is a pop song. Vocals were recorded with the C1, and the drums are samples. I'm not totally happy with the drum levels, but I am getting sick of remixing them.

I recorded both songs on a Fostex VF-08 then transferred them to the PC using an Audiophile 2496 card.

Please give me some input on the songs (quality of songs and mixing)

Thanks in advance!
 
I'm listening to Contemplation now....

Nice song. :)

I thought the guitar comes in a bit to abruptly at the start.
I also didn't like the note played at around the 1:14 or 1:15 mark... it was 'noticeably' flat because the guitar was a bit too strong there.
The song sounded really nice during the change at around the 2:20 mark, because the piano part was played louder and matched better with the volume level of the guitar.
Overall, the song has a nice feel to it... despite some hesitation in some of the playing. (...I'm not sure if that was intended, so disregard that comment if it was)
The mix could have been more crisp and clear, but that could have something to do with conversion into an mp3.
The C1 sounded pretty nice, though... very smooooth.


It's Only Money...

Another good song!
I agree about the drum samples, so I'll refrain from comment.
Nice harmonies!!!!!! Wow!!! I LOVE those layered vocals!! :)
I liked the amount of reverb you used on the vocals... it's "just right". ;)
Mixwise, I'd like to hear the guitar brought up just a bit. I believe that would compliment the vocals even more.
What acoustic guitar did you use? Sounds like a laminated top, because I don't hear those beefy, low-end tones. No problem though... still sounds nice!
A real set of drums would sound great on this song. I hope you can get that done somehow... it would make a this song really shine.

Well done!!!! :)

Buck
 
Only Money.

well written song. The vocal arrangment is wonderful! You already know how the drums are. How much control over the drums do you have? i.e. is the whole kit on one track, can you compress the kick and pan the high end?

Very tight song. touching and well paced.

Theron.
 
Buck and Theron, thanks for the feedback!

Buck, I think I will look at re-playing the guitar parts with less hesitation and with a less-harsh intro note. I will also probably drop the guitar level down to match with the piano in the softer parts. The guitar I used on Only Money is an Ibanez. To be honest, I am a keyboard player and not much of a guitarist (this is probably more obvious on Contemplation), so I don't know if my guitar is a laminated top or not!!! :) I did cut some of the low end on the overall mix (it sounded too bassy on my home stereo after I mixed on my PS-6 monitors) so maybe that took out the low-end tones of the guitar sound??

Theron, I did the drums on multiple MIDI tracks then played them back with drum samples onto 2 tracks. I can easily re-do the sounds by changing the levels or using different samples; I just could never seem to get it right. When you say to compress the kick, what sort of sound should I be looking for? More volume on the kick, or just a tighter sound, or what? Also, what do you mean by "panning the high end"? Any suggestions on the drums will be GREATLY appreciated!

Thanks again for the comments.
 
To be honest, I kind of like those drums!

On contemplation, what is that reverb you're using on the acoustic guitar? It's killing me, it sounds so metallic and harsh. I can't believe that is the JV-1010 piano, it sounds pretty damn good. The acoustic guitar on this song is waaaaaaay too bassy.

On Only Money, I like this song. My big hate in the world is too much reverb, or reverb using just to make things sound washy. I think you almost have it just right, but it's a little too much for me. But the vocals are excellent, very heartfelt, and i like the drums and guitars.
 
Thanks for the comments guys! Nice to know you all liked It's Only Money.
Charger, your ears hear what mine hear - I thought the reverb on Contemplation was metallic also -- it's the on-board reverb from the Fostex VF-08. I guess since someone else noticed, I definitely need to change it. For the reverb on Money, I loaded the vocal track into my PC and did a reverb in Cool Edit. I guess I will just re-do the entire guitar track and take some low end out and use the PC for the reverb. Glad you liked the piano sound from the Roland. I just bought that module, it has some good sounds for the money.
 
I listened to contemplation first.

Ok, I was really really enjoying the piano line. It's very soothing. Then the guitar came in and smashed me over the head. It just doesn't sound right at all. It's too loud for one thing, and it sounds way out of tune on first listen.....however, listening again, I hear where you were going with it. I'm not sure if you can do what you want to do with that guitar part...maybe the guitar can take over and the piano can pull it off a little better....maybe just a little bit more sensitivity in your playing instead of DUM...DUH DUMM. Or maybe finding the right chords instead of the solo plucking would fit it together a little bit nicer. One thing for sure, turn that guitar down! Man, I really like the idea, and I like the piano a LOT. I'm not trying to be rude...it's just when that guitar came in I was a little shocked and the whole thing fell apart for me.

I also checked out "it's only money." I like the vocal melody quite a bit, though I'm not as keen on the chorus. This is a very classic sounding tune. I like the sound of all the instruments and the vocal sound works well. The drums seem a little too far back except for the crash, which is kinda weird. Overall a well written song and nice recording! I like!

Slackmaster 2000
 
contemplation:
the guitar does come in abruptly, but i liked the piece on first listen.

the piano lays the groundwork, and continues to play that role when the guitar comes in, but the guitar strays from its foundation at times. i liked the way you came back to the refrain at 2:45, but you didn't let the guitar re-phrase the refrain like you did when you first brought it in over the paino foundation. my ear was waiting for it, and when it didn't hear it, i was sad.

also, there are spots where the piano and guitar are both busy, and it clutters my head, because they are both active but not playing the same thing. maybe i'm exposing my limited listening ability, but it was hard to follow in those spaces.

It's only Money:
i really like this dreamy tune. kind of has a rembrandts meets the smithereens kind of thing going. you've got decent vocal chops too.
 
Nice job on "It's Only Money"! Very catchy...sounds a bit like some of Neil Young's stuff to me, which is good!

Haven't heard the other yet, but I'm sure it's just as good. Thanks for sharing your music...
 
Thanks for the comments! I have already taken the inputs on Contemplation to heart, and I have re-recorded the whole guitar part with a different guitar (my first attempt was on a nylon string classical guitar that I obviously don't have the expertise to play delicately; I redid it on a steel string acoustic) and I have added a cello part (using a sampled cello sound) that REALLY adds to it dramatically. I am hoping to get it mixed this week and I'll get it up onto my www.mp3.com/mikhael_ser site as soon as I can (they can take a while to post). I will post a new message when it's up, since I would definitely like input on the revised version!
 
I am in love with It's Only Money. I love the almost fragile sound of the vocal approach... it's a haunting kind of bittersweet song... extremely cool and catchy.
 
I liked both songs. The guitar intro on contemplation is sort of abrupt but the majority of the guitar work is fine. Sounded like it was in my room and I have to listen on LO-FI. So you gotta be doin something right.

gitfiddle
 
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