It has the potential to be a good tune.
I hear a lot of strangeness in the mishmash of notes over and in the progression. Simplify! Reduce the scrum to a basic block-chord progression, and with a single other instrument...or maybe two, if you're careful about it... playing solid melodic things over the chords. Simple things. Try to make them interesting. Sing the parts, or imagine them in your head...resist letting fingers on keys do the composing: the kinda random, easy finger doodles arpeggiating the chords....like it sounds how this one was put together.
The result of the mash is a less impactful use of musical power....which is the result of strong melody, theme, unison, and clarity in the parts.
Um...it's like 11 guys on the field running patterns of 11 different plays. Order is lacking.
That concept, alone, if grasped, and applied, will make your songs move and groove a lot more.
Check out stuff like Fleetwood Mack, for example. Listen for order and unison and melody ....and space....in the supporting parts.
That's my advice. Oh, and keep plugging. The only way you won't progress is by standing still.