Craig Schmidt - "Go" (YouTube link)

Craigocaster

New member
Hey guys, It's been awhile since I've been on here. I wrote a new song and I was hoping for some feedback.

Specifically I want to know what you guys think of:
A) The vocals - are they "acceptable" for lack of a better word? Too pitchy?
B) Keep the song acoustic and record it properly in this style, or do a full band rock version?
C) Structure - should I add parts or does the song sound complete as is?

Here's the YouTube link of me playing it on my acoustic.

YouTube

Edit: updated rock demo (progress)
YouTube



Thanks for listening!

Craig
 
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Nice song - I like the accidental train sound before the start!
(A) Yes, pitchy in parts but not like 'ouch'! It's an energetic, emotional live performance, so fine. In a studio, yes, you'd maybe Melodyne one or two parts, being careful not to lose any of the feel.
(B) The song stands well acoustically. It would have been nicer to hear less guitar and more vocal but I appreciate the live setup put you further back than the guitar. I personally wouldn't do a rock band version.
(C) Structure: A little more light and shade wouldn't hurt; I felt there were long passages of the same pattern at the same volume. I'd play the verse part quieter to build anticipation so that the chorus from "I said go..." (the hook-y part) is louder in contrast and acts as a 'release'. I'd also break the strumming pattern somewhere to give the listener a breather before the last chorus/big finish. Arpeggios of the main chords would be nice to make a middle 8?
Just my 2p's worth! Thanks for the listen, I enjoyed it!

John
 
Thanks for submitting this Craig, I enjoyed listening. Thoughts are:

a) the vocal performance sounds good, although there's a bit of a 'strain' to them in some of the more dramatic parts - almost like you're trying to compete with the guitar a bit. I'd be intrigued to hear how it sounds with the vox recorded separately to the guitar
b) I say give it a go recording with the acoustic. I think the song will start to speak for itself and you can judge whether it's saying what you want it to say in the style it's been recorded (this partly answers your third question too). I feel like a full band version might start to detract from what you're trying to convey. But it's not a matter of these two choices - you might find some additional instrumentation or subtle layers will help elevate the song.
c) "Art is never finished, only abandoned." Not sure how helpful/infuriating that quote is to you but it's something I try to keep in mind these days. To me, the song sounds 'complete' although I think John has given you some great suggestions in the post above.
 
So.... I'd say you have a good presence, good voice, good playing and you just need to relax and go at this song with love and feeling it.

I am a BIG FAN of live recordings but you need to prepare and have every grain of sand in place before you press record...and you may have press record more than once...

On the audio side definitely you need to have two tracks one for the guitar, one for the vocals so you can mix the audio and dabble after the fact if needed..

Neils video below is perfect example of what you want to shoot for as a audio mix and a way of performing to own the listener...note Neil has a bit of reverb on his voice ...that would help you a bit...also have a monitor to hear what you are laying down..

Neils 3 camera production probably cost 10's of thousands of dollars when that video was shot 40 years ago.

With a little planning a few hundred bucks ($12 for Reco live multi cam software) and 3 friends with iPhones you could put together a video like the one below...in some nice setting on the cheap ....sans the living room

 
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I thought the song was cool.

Your voice was pitchy in spots. I would say this take wasn't acceptable. I'm not sure you can hit the loud and high notes. You might be able to with some rehearsing. But with some rehearsing and some punch ins you might be able to pull it off.

I think that it would be better as a full rock version.

I'm thinking double tracked crunch guitars. A cleaner guitar doing some fills/riffs. Drums and bass. Straight forward stuff.
 
A) The vocals - are they "acceptable" for lack of a better word? Too pitchy?

Vocals and performance are fine. Good use of dynamics to convey emotion. Like others have said, your vocals are getting lost in the recording, but you aren't asking about the mix.

B) Keep the song acoustic and record it properly in this style, or do a full band rock version?

Yes, no and all points in between. The song could definitely stand to have more parts to it. Straight up strumming gets boring quickly. Whether you choose to do a full on rock band approach or keep it acoustic is a personal taste thing, but definitely needs more parts.

C) Structure - should I add parts or does the song sound complete as is?

I thought it was fine. What do you think? If you add more parts a per my suggestion, you'll be changing the structure... there is no problem in doing so.
 
Wow that is so much for listening and for the awesome advice [MENTION=21330]Skyline_UK[/MENTION]!! I am making a demo for this and I took your advice about breaking it up and changing the strumming in sections. I will post a link below. I didnt do full arpeggios in tge verse but kind of. It actually sounds like a completely different song now honestly. I scrapped some sections and added a few. Check it out if you have a minute. Thanks again!
 
Thanks for submitting this Craig, I enjoyed listening. Thoughts are:

a) the vocal performance sounds good, although there's a bit of a 'strain' to them in some of the more dramatic parts - almost like you're trying to compete with the guitar a bit. I'd be intrigued to hear how it sounds with the vox recorded separately to the guitar
b) I say give it a go recording with the acoustic. I think the song will start to speak for itself and you can judge whether it's saying what you want it to say in the style it's been recorded (this partly answers your third question too). I feel like a full band version might start to detract from what you're trying to convey. But it's not a matter of these two choices - you might find some additional instrumentation or subtle layers will help elevate the song.
c) "Art is never finished, only abandoned." Not sure how helpful/infuriating that quote is to you but it's something I try to keep in mind these days. To me, the song sounds 'complete' although I think John has given you some great suggestions in the post above.

Thank you for the wise words! I ended up going the rock route with it. I'm not done yet but so am close. Hopefully in a couple weeks I'll have a finished demo.
(The progress link is below)
 
So.... I'd say you have a good ....

Thanks man! I like Neil and that all those old videos. I do want to make a music video for this eventually but now that I've chosen to go full band I think I'll do it a little differently. Maybe a full band / storyline video.

I did watch a bunch of vocal tutorials and I tried to stay conscious of relaxing this time round like you suggested.

Thanks again for the tips!
 
Thanks for all the tips everyone! Here's where I'm at with this one.

Turns out I was playing it 2 steps too high in that first demo. I transposed it to the key of B and it made a world of difference for my voice. Way easier to sing to.

And as you can hear, I've changed the song drastically. Basically sounds like a new song. I scrapped a couple parts that I actually really like, but couldn't get to fit in the rock version. I wrote new verses and a bridge, and gave a more traditional radio rock structure.

The vocals are first pass on a couple parts. Disclaimer: the Go-Whoa-oh-oh part is a tad shaky in a couple parts, but I haven't had a chance yet to take a couple hours to track those vocals properly.

YouTube
 
hey craigocaster,
listening to haunt me......

dig the vibe of the song..
reminds me a bit of silverchair....

the vox at the opening, during the mellow part, are a bit pitchy...
they float around loosely, and it still works, but i think it'd be better to nail the pitches more deliberately.

you pull it in on the choruses, where you are pushing harder.....
in a song like this, the vocals have to nail the pitches, think of a 30 seconds to mars kind of approach.

guitar tones are great,
i'm digging the bass as well, it is serving everything nicely...
the kick, sounds a bit pointy, but the snare is nice and fat.

the mix as a whole is good.
 
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