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Thread: Barely Alive - Grunge Song

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    Barely Alive - Grunge Song

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    Hi all,

    Wrote and recorded this 90's grunge vibe song over a weekend. Feedback most welcome:



    BARELY ALIVE
    (Words by Jonathan Linton, Music by Jonathan Linton)

    I’m a machine
    Help everyone
    I’ve always been
    The unfortunate son
    So leave me behind
    With my despair
    I have resigned
    To go nowhere

    Body is strong
    But the mind is gone
    Hope deprived
    I’m barely alive
    Each time
    I find
    A lifeline
    It’s deprived
    Yeah, I’m barely alive

    I’ve been accused
    I’ve been abused
    They even hide
    When they’re amused
    Preyed upon
    Future foregone
    Ambition gone
    But doomed to live on

    Body is strong
    But the mind is gone
    Hope deprived
    I’m barely alive
    Each time
    I find
    A lifeline
    It’s deprived
    Yeah, I’m barely alive

    SOLO

    Body is strong
    But the mind is gone
    Hope deprived
    I’m barely alive
    Each time
    I find
    A lifeline
    It’s deprived
    Yeah, I’m barely alive
    I’m barely alive
    I’m barely alive
    Barely alive
    Barely alive
    Last edited by jonlint; 11-03-2019 at 11:32.

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    Okay... Straight from the gate, this sucker ROCKS! Yeah, man. Guitars are very present, and the drums are kickin'. Very exciting aurally.

    About half-way through the song, one thing that, which is totally subjective, kind of got on my nerves was the vocal doubling throughout. The harmonies are great, but the main melody is also doubled, and this would be okay usually, but the rest of the instrumentation is just awesome. To illustrate the difference, when the solo comes in, everything is clean and clear - with *one* solo guitar playing... The vocals could do the same if the main melody was just a solo voice, and perhaps even if some of the harmonies were taken out. They're just a bit more messy than the rest of the instrumentation. (and I'm being very nit-picky here) The song sounds great, and the mix is awesome!

    Great work! Thanks for sharing.
    --PoeticIntensity
    ArtCitySound.com

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    Quote Originally Posted by PoeticIntensity View Post
    Okay... Straight from the gate, this sucker ROCKS! Yeah, man. Guitars are very present, and the drums are kickin'. Very exciting aurally.

    About half-way through the song, one thing that, which is totally subjective, kind of got on my nerves was the vocal doubling throughout. The harmonies are great, but the main melody is also doubled, and this would be okay usually, but the rest of the instrumentation is just awesome. To illustrate the difference, when the solo comes in, everything is clean and clear - with *one* solo guitar playing... The vocals could do the same if the main melody was just a solo voice, and perhaps even if some of the harmonies were taken out. They're just a bit more messy than the rest of the instrumentation. (and I'm being very nit-picky here) The song sounds great, and the mix is awesome!

    Great work! Thanks for sharing.
    Hey there,

    Thanks for the compliments and feedback. There is some wisdom in your critique, and good critique should be nit-picky, so no apologies needed. I will consider taking some harmonies out and maybe raising the doubling vocals in their place for the final version.

    In the meantime, I made a remix because some of the mix balance was off to me and also based on some critique. Here it is:


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    Top riffs and the vocals are very good. Nitpicking the rythym chugs could have been heavier/beefier. On headphones tho. Nice job

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    I thought this was a very well written and produced song. I thought the kick and snare could come up 1db maybe. Otherwise this is ready. I'd target this to the grunge market. Get it out there.

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