Acoustic ballad "My Friend"

lifelyrics

lifelyrics

Training wheels on
What do you think? Can you tell I've been learning from you guys? I know, my vocals still have somewhat to be desired, but go ahead and give it to me straight. Critique whatever strikes you!

http://soundclick.com/share?songid=7917358

The song I'm working on now should be up in a few days. I'm looking forward to sharing it, because two of my daughters are doing the vocals instead of me. My youngest daughter has a great singing personality - a lot more flair, or something, than I do.
 
I'm a bit confused. Yesterday, this song got 10 plays, and one download, but I haven't heard from anyone! So, does that mean one person liked it, and everyone else hated it?:confused::confused:

If any of you could spare a few minutes, I'd really appreciate a nod, or something!
 
OK! I just listened to the first two bars and stopped: Sarah McGlaughlin's piano comping style...relaxed and gospelly...with a much more robust piano sound...the tack hammers are gone. Going back in great anticipation....

Well, the vocals sound a lot better, too. And the longer part of solo vocal w/o harmony is about 90% spot-on. But there are times when you're not nailing the pitches...sliding up and down...OK if you can do it quickly enough...

Your melody consists of step-wise scalar lines, mostly. What it need is more intervallic leapishness to make it less flaccid...more interesting. Sarah McGlaughlin is a good study in interesting melody. Singing a lot more chord-tones in leaps of thirds, fourths and fifths....translates to strength and memorability. It's not something you can so much 'craft', but something you have to be inspired to 'hear', and transcribe from your imagination. Listening to good vocal melody, and playing it on your instrument to give you a 'picture'...visual, on the keys, and auditory, might help get some juices flowing in your brain's 'melody lobe'...so to speak.....without having to delve into the theory and such. I'd also suggest listening to, and learning to sing, classical melodies..Bach and Mozart, etc. Melodies never were made stronger or more beautiful. It's brain-train!

Now the intonation thing.
A singing coach might be a worthwhile investment...focusing on ear/voice pitch acuity. There are exercises. It's all training. Your so close. You need some professional guidance to make the most of what you've got. And you do have a lot......but inconsistantly. A lot of the skill of maintaing pitch, breathing, enunciating......all a mind-game. A good coach can cue you in to a lot of what should be going on in your head and body. After the exercises and learning, you go on auto-pilot and let emotion drive the hotrod with fine-tuned suspension and motor: you watch the track, and let the car do its thing, y'know?

Now the harmony thing. The harmonies are awkward. A lot more parellellism is needed...so you don't end up singing montarily in octaves...which makes the intonation problem really obvious. Practice parts over the melody.....work the harmony very close to the contours of the melody...maintaining a very similar shape and intervallic range.
Try different notes....record and listen. Or have a friend who is a gifted harmonizer derive some parts for you beyond what you can conjure.....surely there are a couple friends in the church choir?? Learn those parts, and you'll develop an organic feel for what works, I think. I got my best training working out doo-whoppers in an acappella quartet a long time ago. Form a group like that to have some fun and learning with. Great schoolin'. Gospel tunes like Amazing Grace...whatever. You work them out. And someone of the group with some technical training will get you all communicating such that you'll learn what thirds, fourths and fifths...suspensions, etc....sound like. It's the voice/brain thing that develops.



Anyway...huge improvements!! Keep going! I love the piano, and those stretches where you sing like an angel.

If you're serious about developing this craft...and you should be...it's time to get to serious work. Your raw gifts and drive to create ...and exponentially-improving recording ears...are worth the investment. MHO
 
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Hi Jeff,

I don't know how to thank you for your giving feedback. I was feeling very blue about the fact that several had seemingly looked at my request for feedback or critique, and decided not to respond in any way. You gave me a lot to think about and work toward, and I'm very grateful. I can't afford a vocal coach right now, or any time soon (raising 5 kids is expensive!), but I'm a sponge for words of guidance. I think I might be a slow learner in some things, but I keep going back to everything that is said to me, and trying to implement as much as my brain can grasp.

You mentioned Sara McLachlan. She has been one of my favorites for years, but most of the time I don't sing with her when I listen. I have acoustic recordings of her, Sara Bareilles, Adele, Ingrid Michaelson, all of whom I am very impressed with, but never thought I could emulate.

I do want to improve, and do the exercises you suggested. I feel like you are encouraging me to reach further than I thought I ever even would try to reach. So, again, thank you.

Maybe by the time I get through recording the rest of the songs I've written so far, I'll have it down-pat! :) I think I have about 27 songs to go...
 
I loved the song, the piano and the lead vox. However, I thought the song would be better without the harmony. It distracted me, and amplified the wavering pitch.

I think you can get away with less-than-perfect pitch (Neil Young, Bob Dylan, Dewey Bunnell) as long as there's only one voice.

Really nice song, though.

-Mike
 
Sounds good. I would leave it with only the lead vocal and get rid of the backing. Also the voice seems to come from a little to the left. Weird.
 
Thank you, Mike.
I think I should re-post the song without the harmony, and work it out, or leave it solo. I'm thinking I should probably spend more time learning what I want to do instead of the way I've been doing it. Basically, get the lead done, and then listen to it a couple of times, and come up with something on the fly. I'm not exactly sure where I'm going, as you can probably tell - I think I sang it differently each time the chorus came 'round.

I feel like the little train going up the hill, "I think I can, I think I can - pause, can I? Breathe, I think I can"
 
Marcadiablo said:
Also the voice seems to come from a little to the left. Weird.
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I was listening to it, when I was mixing, and noticed the voice and the piano were center. When I pictured a singer playing a piano (a beautiful grand piano that I don't have, by the way!) I saw her there, a little to the left, and then a mic somewhere in the middle of the piano. I thought the other singer (who is going to go away - at least for a while) was there, at the end of the piano. So, is that weird? I moved them out from the piano ever so slightly.
 
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p.s. I'm planning on re-recording the bridge when I solo the lead. I was getting a sore throat when I did that part!!
 
That's the way y' learn.

I did a google of ["singing exercises" intonation pitch] There are tons of free tutorials, CD's and books. Nothing like a real teacher...but self-study will get you far.

I think you have to destroy a couple-hundred projects to attain a level of competance.

I'm not there yet. Bit there's only one way.....and your doing it! Do something every day on the machine, with your voice; read and listen. You'll get better and better.
 
lifelyrics said:
I was listening to it, when I was mixing, and noticed the voice and the piano were center. When I pictured a singer playing a piano (a beautiful grand piano that I don't have, by the way!) I saw her there, a little to the left, and then a mic somewhere in the middle of the piano. I thought the other singer (who is going to go away - at least for a while) was there, at the end of the piano. So, is that weird? I moved them out from the piano ever so slightly.
Click to expand...
Maybe weird was not a good way for me to put it. I meant it more in the way of unusual. I can see now that you went for an artistic kind of panning. Its just that is a little distracting, at least for me. Remember there is not right or wrong in this. Nice work.
 
When i listen to a song off of this site I listen and concentrate on 3 areas: Recoring quality, Song writting and then performance of the piece.

I think you have a fantastic song that is recorded decently with a decent performance. I think if you recorded it at my place with my Neumann and compressor your vocal would be even better. It also helps to have someone tell you which parts need to be redone.

Again, overall, I think it's something to be proud of. Keep working!
 
Marcadiablo,
Thank you for clearing that up for me. I understand your meaning, and appreciate your comment about it being an "artistic" choice.

TaintedDb,
Thanks for the compliment!

A few weeks ago, I wouldn't have thought I would be trying to "perform" my songs. I simply thought I was going to "chronicle" (sort of like a musical diary) all these songs I've written... I'm learning so much from the folks here, and I can't help but want to keep working at the performance part of it! I think I used to sort of expect people to separate my lack of ability/training from the song itself. I now see that was not the right approach to sharing these songs that are dear to my heart!

So, yes. I will keep working at it, and hopefully improving with every bit of advice that is given to me (as I learn how to use it!).

Thanks to all of you for your encouragement.
 
Don't be afraid to play with the stereo image - make us work a little.
To be frank I don't mind the bvox - they do accentuate the occasional pitch issue but you'll work on the pitch issue & it won't be a problem.
You've certainly taken note of comments about the piano accompaniment from the last track & the simplicity/sparceness suits bothe the theme and your voice.
Nice one - keep doing.
 
Thank you, Ray, for your feedback. Much appreciated. I wasn't able to fix the song yet, and we're going camping over the weekend, but I'll be straight to it when we get back!

rayc said:
the bvox - they do accentuate the occasional pitch issue but you'll work on the pitch issue & it won't be a problem.
Click to expand...

Yes! I'm working on my pitch issues with the "brain-training" techniques Jeff suggested earlier! I'm really excited about this. I read several pages from this website yesterday http://www.your-personal-singing-guide.com/index.html, to prepare for my little experiment. After trying a couple of mozart tunes that were, actually, too high for me, I settled on a bassoon concerto in Bb: K 191 - Rondo: Tempo Di Minuetto. Played it on a loop while making tacos & beans for dinner.

It was amazing what I began to notice as I hummed, sang different vowel sounds, then consonant sound like "ti" and "gi". I felt where the vibrations were going in my head with the different pitches and sounds (especially the humming). I noticed where the melody was easy for me to imitate and more difficult for me to get a hold of. So many things started clicking, and I'm so EXCITED about this training, because I know it's exactly what I needed to help me get past some of my issues!!

Thanks again to all, and I'll be back!

I don't want to settle for mediocrity any more. I'm striving for excellence!!
 
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