1st suprstar original
- Thread starter suprstar
- Start date
joeym
New member
Hey buddy, nice to hear something from you here.
The song's pretty good and I can see where you're going with the style.
But I think that overall, you need to approach it better.
First thing is, it sounds totally mono, like everything's dead centered. Guitar tone could be a bit better, kind of warmer (scooped the mids?) and I would record 2 to 4 rythm tracks and pan them left and right. Next thing the drumkit: it sounds very compressed, let it breathe and use some panning there too. Arrangement-wise, the singer's got a pretty good voice. Here and there a couple of small pitchy parts, but you can go back and fix those. Here again some panning would work better with the interacting voices, because they're both coming from the centre. I felt the ending came a little bit abrupt.
Hope this helps you along.
Joey
The song's pretty good and I can see where you're going with the style.
But I think that overall, you need to approach it better.
First thing is, it sounds totally mono, like everything's dead centered. Guitar tone could be a bit better, kind of warmer (scooped the mids?) and I would record 2 to 4 rythm tracks and pan them left and right. Next thing the drumkit: it sounds very compressed, let it breathe and use some panning there too. Arrangement-wise, the singer's got a pretty good voice. Here and there a couple of small pitchy parts, but you can go back and fix those. Here again some panning would work better with the interacting voices, because they're both coming from the centre. I felt the ending came a little bit abrupt.
Hope this helps you along.
Joey
Chili
Site Moderator
I like the call and response on the vocals, however, they are both right up the middle and sound the same. Kind of not working like that. I think it would work with the main vocal as is, then double track the 2nd vox part and hard pan to left and right. Nice voice, btw.
Guitars are prominent, I'd suggest backing them off a little. Sounds like the very first note is truncated when it starts.
I agree with the comments on the drums.
I like the song, arrangement, performance. Little bit of work and this is a killer tune!!!
Cool man.
Guitars are prominent, I'd suggest backing them off a little. Sounds like the very first note is truncated when it starts.
I agree with the comments on the drums.
I like the song, arrangement, performance. Little bit of work and this is a killer tune!!!
Cool man.
suprstar
It aint ez being green
thanks for the comments, appreciate it!
Drums: Does it sound squashed or just mechanical? Not sure what I can do about those, they're midi -> ezdrummer, with a light low ratio/high threshold compression on the kick and snare, and no other fx. I put it on the kick cuz I thought it made it a little punchier, altho maybe I could accomplish that with some eq instead? The snare got a little to make it snappier.
Guitars: Actually, there are 3 rhythm guitar tracks, panned R74, C, L74.. Except for the 4th center lead track, they're all playing identical parts.. Maybe I'm playing them so perfectly in sync it sounds like one guitar
So.. maybe lose the center rhythm track? Yeah the eq is a little more scooped than it should be prolly, I totally know better than that too...
Vox: Yeah the 2 vox tracks are dead center, thats a good idea to pan em a little when it's back and forth like that, esp. when they're singing the same note. I'll mess with it!
Drums: Does it sound squashed or just mechanical? Not sure what I can do about those, they're midi -> ezdrummer, with a light low ratio/high threshold compression on the kick and snare, and no other fx. I put it on the kick cuz I thought it made it a little punchier, altho maybe I could accomplish that with some eq instead? The snare got a little to make it snappier.
Guitars: Actually, there are 3 rhythm guitar tracks, panned R74, C, L74.. Except for the 4th center lead track, they're all playing identical parts.. Maybe I'm playing them so perfectly in sync it sounds like one guitar
So.. maybe lose the center rhythm track? Yeah the eq is a little more scooped than it should be prolly, I totally know better than that too...Vox: Yeah the 2 vox tracks are dead center, thats a good idea to pan em a little when it's back and forth like that, esp. when they're singing the same note. I'll mess with it!
Last edited:
suprstar
It aint ez being green
I'm doing all the instruments 1 at a time, my wife is the singer Today I'm gonna try chili's idea and get her to double the backups, then I'll pan em L/R, we'll see how that works.
I'm re-doing guitar stuff right now, trying to pan it out more.. I'm listening to is as I type. On the acoustic parts, except for the intro, I turned the center track WAAAY down, practically muted.. I panned the L/R ones 100% L/R, I can't pan em any more than that! I also re-tracked the heavy guitars with a more appropriate eq.. I swear I checked my amp b4 I tracked that, I KNOW that's a no-no, I have no excuse ..
I'll have a remix up soon, should be better,
Today I'm gonna try chili's idea and get her to double the backups, then I'll pan em L/R, we'll see how that works.I'm re-doing guitar stuff right now, trying to pan it out more.. I'm listening to is as I type. On the acoustic parts, except for the intro, I turned the center track WAAAY down, practically muted.. I panned the L/R ones 100% L/R, I can't pan em any more than that! I also re-tracked the heavy guitars with a more appropriate eq.. I swear I checked my amp b4 I tracked that, I KNOW that's a no-no, I have no excuse ..
I'll have a remix up soon, should be better,
Sirnothingness
Banned
I really like the song. I wish I had better speakers so I could give advice. But I don't so I'll just say that I liked it.
suprstar
It aint ez being green
suprstar remix
Here's a remix based on all your feedback:
That link is broken now, here's a 3rd remix:
Here's a remix based on all your feedback:
That link is broken now, here's a 3rd remix:
Last edited:
Chili
Site Moderator
This sounds good. Your wife has a great tone to her voice. I would suggest bringing the 2nd vox parts down just a tad during the verses and back up to where they are now for the choruses.
Bring the ending guitar lick down a little, too, it steps all over the vox.
Not crazy about the snare. I think ido has it right about compression, or something.
Everythign else sounds good. Nice tune, man.
Bring the ending guitar lick down a little, too, it steps all over the vox.
Not crazy about the snare. I think ido has it right about compression, or something.
Everythign else sounds good. Nice tune, man.
cantthinkofname
Active member
that sure is a nice song you have there, like alot of songs (including my own) i lost interest along the way, i hope you don't take offense to that
PoeticIntensity
MagicJones.com (is a website)
Man... I've gotta quit listening to music and go to bed already...
Some nits:
1. The call voice is great, and the response voice is great, too, but they're too similar. I know they're the same person, but I'm thinking that if they were different texturally, it'd make the the song more interesting, and make it easier to overlap the two voices without losing them in themselves.
2. The drums sound plastic. Especially the open-hihat throughout. Gotta do something with that.
3. I love the image created by the guitars / bass. Sounds really good. The acoustic guitar in the beginning could be lowered a bit in the mix, so when the electrics and bass come in, it would be a bit more explosive.
I'm a bit tempted to try to play to this with my drum kit... I like the groove of the song. Would you be willing to provide a drum-minus track?
Some nits:
1. The call voice is great, and the response voice is great, too, but they're too similar. I know they're the same person, but I'm thinking that if they were different texturally, it'd make the the song more interesting, and make it easier to overlap the two voices without losing them in themselves.
2. The drums sound plastic. Especially the open-hihat throughout. Gotta do something with that.
3. I love the image created by the guitars / bass. Sounds really good. The acoustic guitar in the beginning could be lowered a bit in the mix, so when the electrics and bass come in, it would be a bit more explosive.
I'm a bit tempted to try to play to this with my drum kit... I like the groove of the song. Would you be willing to provide a drum-minus track?
suprstar
It aint ez being green
#1 - I thought about that, I was messing around with some chorus, reverb, extreme eq'ing, and misc fx for exactly those reasons.. In the end, I wasn't happy with anything I tried.
#2 - Yeah, def. my weak link...... I have 2 options - playing vdrums and recording midi, or programming midi. I've tried playing it, but my drumming sux. Programming drums sounds mechanical, or MY programming does anyway. Thus my dilemma, I'm kinda picking the better of 2 evils there.... I was working on a better drum mix yesterday, I'll be working on it more today.
#3 - Yeah, it was more like that in the beginning, the compression on the master bus brought the levels closer together, didnt really notice. Thx, I'll re-visit that,
Could be deliberate - it worked really well for me as an into, though there is a major ambience clash with the electric that follows it. Actually, I have a problem with the electric guitar altogether, I don't think it suits the song one bit. I really began to hate it when it came back in at 2.28. It just has this unnecessarily overpowering presence that the song just isn't about.
I'm totally sold on the vocals though, they're brilliant - full of character, very convincing in their delivery, definitely the songs greatest assett. I didn't bother listening to previous mixes but I think this last one is a bit too natural sounding in terms of its room, you might want to add some reverb. Thing is, the vocals and the beat bring some sort of transcendental quality to the song, but in terms of its ambience, it's locked into a very physical room. The rather dead-sounding drums also don't help, you might want to pull them into the background.
Best of luck if you do another mix, I think the song deserves it.
suprstar
It aint ez being green
Thanks greg, yeah it's direct in, electric/acoustic to a di box.. I did take a mic track but it has tons of finger sliding and other background noise so I junked it. I've been making a bunch of tweaks all day long, on pretty much ALL the tracks. Some reverb on the acoustic and drum kit, some tweaking to the drum midi, some other minor stuff..
is the final for now, I'm getting burned out on it, I didn't really do anything else all weekend long Plus I dont wanna keep posting remix after remix after remix...........
Thanks everyone for the great advice, the song is way better than I woulda got it by myself! And my wife wishes to thank you all for the compliments on her vox, she's excited to make more songs, so we'll be posting more in the future.
is the final for now, I'm getting burned out on it, I didn't really do anything else all weekend long
Plus I dont wanna keep posting remix after remix after remix...........Thanks everyone for the great advice, the song is way better than I woulda got it by myself! And my wife wishes to thank you all for the compliments on her vox, she's excited to make more songs, so we'll be posting more in the future.