my first jam session!

L

Layla Nahar

New member
I've been there when people have jammed and I've always wanted to join in, but I FREEZE UP. I get sooo scared. Its impossible. The other day I was hanging with these dudes from Berklee and they wanted me to join them. I was like NO WAY - I'm ok I'll just watch. But later one of the guys said "I'll show you how to do it" & we got together, I felt so shy & so intimidated, but he was real cool, & I actually did it - I started off real little like a little bunny rabbit - but he was like, Ok, put a little more into it, and eventually I was able to actally play like, little riffs & stuff, my own solo, acutally, while he comped a blues thing. But I still felt - very strange, even with this supportive friend, prolly coz he's soooo good. I'm really intimidated by that. & I still feel funny acting like *I'm* a musician or something ... like I don't have any right to do this, this is for THEM the MUSICIANS ... so it was a really big deal what I did. And the dude was like, that was pretty good. I guess my fingers will do it ok - & even my heart will - it's my head that gets in the way! I'll just have my brain removed, like Spock, then I'll jam like a maniac!!
 
That's fantastic. I used to be exactly like that, getting intimidated, not confidant about your playing. It does go away, and now that you've broken the ice, it only gets better from here.

Keep it up.

Satch
 
When I first started playing with other people, I quickly found that people are usually real cool and encouraging, and that playing with people who knew more than me and were more experienced made me play better.
 
If you're in the metro Boston area there are lots of folk and bluegrass jams, and also songwriter circles where folks swap tunes and get help with arrangements and stuff like that. It can be very intimidating. But if you find a couple good ones, and go to them regularly, it can be very helpful in building your chops and your confidence. You'll wanna play more so you sound better, and you have kindofa "commitment" to the jam or songcircle. Plus, the folks you meet there will be super-supportive.

Musicians at jams are just like that. It's not like a band where folks are competing for face-time.

I sucked like a tornado at the Jamfest last year, but folks told me I did great.;)

Also, if you're in Boston, you really don't have an excuse to miss the 4th Annual Home Recording.com /MisterQCue Memorial Dangling Powerstrip Jamfest!!!

because it's just down the road from you in Andover, CT.

Give Q and UpstateSteve a big hug for me, too.:D
 
AlChuck said:
When I first started playing with other people, I quickly found that people are usually real cool and encouraging, and that playing with people who knew more than me and were more experienced made me play better.
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Definitely. I think often people underestimate themselves as a player and all it takes is one or two jams to get them going, unless they are trully unknowledgeable about the instrument and/or tone deaf/rythmless. Chances are if they are good musicians, and they have heard you play before at some point, and are asking you to play again, that they are probably thinking your a decent musician as well, so don't sweat it, just go with it, and rock out.
 
Anyone ever have a jam session Where noone was leading the changes so ya just jam on that damn Em7 chord for 20 minutes?
 
VTgreen81 said:
Anyone ever have a jam session Where noone was leading the changes so ya just jam on that damn Em7 chord for 20 minutes?
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ya mean yur supposed to have changes in a jam? :p :confused: :eek: :D and since when is that one song less than 20minutes aanyways???
 
GREAT THREAD!!!
I had been in a band with two guys who were MUCH better than me and I was very intimidated by them even though I had a pretty good grasp on the guitar. By playing with them and playing some parts that they wrote or harmonies to those parts, etc, I became SOOOOOOOO much better. probably close to 50% better than I had been and that was in under 2 years time as compared to playing the guitar for 8-9 years prior to that. So, playing with better players is a GREAT thing. You can learn so muhc by just watching, let alone them instructing and guiding you in your playing. Along with the ability your confidence also grows and makes learning new things much easier. good luck and keep hammering away. the dude
 
Think of it the other way round, too. Let's say you are the great player and a lesser player sits in with you.

Are you going to say "You don't play as good as me, so hit the road"?
Of course not!..Every great player was only good at one time. Every good player was only so so at one time. Every so so player was weak at some time. . . . and every one of them was encouraged to play by someone better than them.

Once upon a time, Jeff Beck struggled to play that 'Bb' chord, just like everybody else.
Jam with as many people as you can, and don't be afraid to ask 'what was that' if you hear something you like. Only an insecure dickhead is going to refuse to tell you.

I was really lucky when I was learning to have some excellent players teach me some very cool stuff. I still have a lot to learn, but I also now have an obligation to pass along what I was given.

. . . and one final thought:

The forest would be a really quiet place if the only birds allowed to sing were those that sang the best.
 
"I was really lucky when I was learning to have some excellent players teach me some very cool stuff. I still have a lot to learn, but I also now have an obligation to pass along what I was given."



That would about sum it up for most of us, when I was starting in 1959 I got to sit in with a bunch of real old guys (most likely they were about my age now) they were patient and encouraging and had been in their heyday pretty hot, that was in the 1920's and here I was years later being allowed to sit in with them, I was shit but it was a learning curve and as I got better over the next few years and sat in with them again I got to find out about playing in the 1920's thru 1940's and that was a history lesson more than I ever got in school.
So jam, enjoy and learn. Then when you are a grumpy old bugger you can pass on to a new generation all the tricks you've learned along the way, cut a lot of time off someone elses learning curve and pay back the gift you were given.
Clive
 
Ehhhh...

God I wish I could have one of you guys over to teach me stuff lol. I don't know anyone who's good at guitar and I don't feel like running into weirdos at the music shop so I'm always playing by myself.. or with my friend who started guitar a month ago because of me hehe. I'd like to find someone good and cool to play with. :\

in case god was listenning... age 20-25, montreal, speak french & english, been playing for 4-5 years. =)
 
Layla Nahar said:
But I still felt - very strange, even with this supportive friend, prolly coz he's soooo good. I'm really intimidated by that. & I still feel funny acting like *I'm* a musician or something ... like I don't have any right to do this, this is for THEM the MUSICIANS ... so it was a really big deal what I
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If you are jamming with people who are judging your ability from an ego perspective they are not musicians but dick measurers.
A true musician will help you out and not judge you, and I think you were hanging with them guys, so don't worry about it and go for it.
 
I was the same way myself....... there used to be a place near me called Stormy Mondys, a local spot where they had open mike nights. Tons of players would fill the place, all types too. I was always too afraid of the same things you felt. I have played in bands in front of people with no prob...... it was always the idea of playing in front of all those musicians. Now that I'm older and more confident of myself I can't do it........ it's gone. Whish I had done it, too bad, i would have had fun.
Chris
 
I have and do experience jam shyness and inferiority and so forth from time to time and I have been playing for 12 years. I have also been on the other side of the gun, where I can see people I have played with get physically nervous when playing with me. THe thing is I don't want people to be intimidated or to show everyone how cool I am, most of the time when people jam, they just want to make music. Trust me those exact words have crossed my mind, but jamming is not all about hot licks and perfection. Its about feeling and flow. Its hard, but find the people you are comfortable with and go to it. when you are digging in there and really playing in the moment its beautiful and when and if you mess up, everybody is right there with you working for it too you know. Were you born in Feb or march?
 
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