I Totally Rule (another Variax thread)

chrisharris

King of Bling
...so whatever I say, you should listen to, respect, and treat as the gospel.

This will be a long post, because I'm hoping somebody who is trying to make a purchase decision in the future may run across this and find it helpful. I really wanted to find something like what I'm about to write before I started on this musical quest.

I've been playing acoustic/electric guitar in live settings for over 20 years. I've played in bars, I've played in coffeehouses, I've played outdoor festivals, I've played in arenas... (all of those in the past 2 months, actually).

I've played with the famous and the non-famous. I've written songs you've heard on the radio. I've done one off gigs and run live sound for people that some of you would consider your heroes. I've played on live television and live radio, and I've recorded a lot. (My recordings are always going to be the weakest part of my musical life, because I didn't start recording myself until I was 30, but I'm getting less laughable in that area too).

I do all of these things because I totally rule... I am great, and if anybody here thinks they know anything more than I do about playing live acoustic/electric, I'll just point out that my 16 year old daughter has probably played more gigs than you have, even if you're 50, so stfu. I fucking rule. :D

Now, having prefaced my forthcoming opinion with the foregoing FACTS, listen up. Several weeks ago, I purchased a Line6 Variax Acoustic 300 steel, and I posted here about it. Brand new model of guitar, and I bought it pretty much the day it came out. Sounded fantastic...better than any acoustic/electric/piezo setup I've ever worked with, and I've worked with a lot. Even though it sounded fantastic (once I'd spent several hours dialing it in), it had some Quality Control issues. Three problems surfaced within the first month:
(a) the plastic on the back warped pretty badly...I didn't care for cosmetic purposes, but it was actually warped badly enough that it was exposing the extrinsive electronics in the guitar;
(b) the output signal was weak and sometimes intermittent; and
(c) the guitar came to me with a pretty decent sized chunk of the wood missing out of the body - I really didn't care since my instruments get abused in travel anyway, but it was a little disappointing.

It was the output signal that was the real problem for me...I have to have a reliable guitar...Line6 apologized, asked me when my next gig was, and offered up a replacement. AND, they actually sent me the Acoustic 700 to replace the 300. The 700 has a street price of about $1,200 as opposed to the $600 I paid for the original guitar. I'm sure they did this because they know how much I rule, and they know how influential I am. Yeah, either that, or it's just a great company and they didn't want to leave me in a bind for upcoming gigs. (yes, I have plenty of guitars I could use, but it's damned hard for me to get inspired to play anything other than one of these Line6 Acoustics after doing a few shows with them).

So I had the new 700 for 3 days and played 2 shows with it before I even got a chance to sit down and dial in the guitar. It sounded "ok" for the shows, but nothing earth-shattering. I was actually missing the sound of my cheaper 300, to be honest. Then I got to spend several hours with it on Sunday, and as expected, I got it to sound similar to the 300 that I'd already fallen in love with. Honestly, a huge part of it was just replacing the factory strings with some Elixirs (.11's). The rest of it was finding that delicate balance between compression, model settings, volume, EQ (not much), and FX that just takes time. UNFORTUNATELY, I broke something when I changed the strings. 5 of the 6 strings sound fan-fucking-tastic, and one is muted, lol. (keep in mind, each of the strings on these guitars has its own pickup...that's the only way alternate automatic tunings can work).

YET, DESPITE THE FACT THAT THE 2ND BRAND NEW VARIAX ACOUSTIC I'VE GOTTEN IN TWO MONTHS IS BROKEN, I'M STILL TYPING THIS POST TO TELL SOME GUITAR PLAYER OUT THERE TO BUY ONE OF THESE. These guitars sound SO good, that the technical issues don't piss me off one billionth as much as they would with any other instrument, and I'm one of those guys that really has no patience for anything. (I literally told a women's choir of 30 this weekend to "PLEASE SHUT THE HELL UP" so that I could fix a monitor issue...these women were volunteers donating their talent to a charity...gawd I hated those cows.) ANYWAY, I'm driving 150 miles round trip today just so I don't have to be without this guitar for some upcoming shows....and I actually HAVE a day job, so that may give you some indication of how important I think this particular sound is.

So if any of you wankers want to tell me about how you played one of the variax acoustics for ten minutes in Guitar Center while some pimple-faced can-slammer was running his slack-stringed Fender Squire through a pignose crate amp at maximum volume 5 feet away, and that you just didn't like the way it sounded, I'm going to laugh at you. The only way to truly appreciate this technology (in my opinion) is to set up a full P.A. and spend about ten hours working on your sound. Of course, you only have to do that once...assuming the guitar doesn't break, LOL. I've played both the 300 and the 700 through headphones and through some pretty decent acoustic amps (Trace Elliot TA60CR - great little combo amp, and through a Roland Jazz Chorus...quit laughing, it does a decent job on most acoustics, lol) and they sounded good to me, but again, it probably won't blow your skirt up unless you can run it through a full P.A.

SO HERE'S MY WISDOM. If live acoustic sound is important to you, get a Variax Acoustic. Don't freak out if you go into G.C. and they make you play it through a Cali. Blonde and it only sounds ok...get the freaking guitar. Whether you get the 300 or the 700 doesn't matter in terms of the sound...the 700 has more features (automatic alternate tunings, electronic capo, more instruments, etc.)...but if you just want a great acoustic sound, either guitar will serve you BETTER than a high quality acoustic guitar run through a traditional piezo setup, no matter what kind of amp or monitor system you have. The only thing that compares is the live mic'ing of an acoustic, (because that's what the guitars sound like) but that's just not practical if you play at any appreciable volume, and to be honest, a lot of sound guys will butcher even a mic'd acoustic even WITHOUT the feedback issues.

BUT BRING A BACKUP GUITAR WITH YOU TO EVERY GIG, lol.







EXTRA CREDIT: As I write this, there are only 2 Variax Acoustic Steel string models (the 700, which has been around for a couple of years, and the cheaper 300 which has been around since the summer of '06). I'd never considered purchasing the 700 for its additional features alone. I don't need a banjo, right? I would have only considered buying it for improved sound, and honestly, you can get an equally great dreadnaught acoustic sound out of either instrument; You can get a slightly better jumbo sound out of the 700, but it's not a drastic enough improvement to justify 2x the price... I mean, the idea of an automated capo seemed silly to me...just putting a capo on the guitar is quicker than jacking with the knobs to have the guitar do it; HOWEVER - what I hadn't considered was that while yes, you can raise the pitch of the guitar with the automatic capo, you can LOWER it up to a full octave. This one feature makes the 700 worth the extra $600 in my book if you play a lot of stuff with at least one other guitar player. For as long as I can remember, whenever another guitar player in the band was using a capo for a song, I've thought it was important to find a DIFFERENT capo position so that the 2 acoustic guitars don't start sounding like competing mandolins, lol. Playing acoustic guitars in different positions has always added a texture that I just personally love...sounds like a 12 string in alternate tuning or something...it's beautiful. Well, with the ability to LOWER the tuning on the guitar, I can make a 2 person acoustic show sound like we've got 2 acoustics and a freaking bass as well. It fills out the sound tremendously...I wouldn't do it a lot for a solo show, because it sounds a little "off," but it's really not bad solo'd, and it's AMAZING in a mix. I wouldn't use the electronic capo to raise pitch more than about one and a half steps unless you just really LIKE that twangy "hey Mr. Tambourine Man" guitar sound. But you can lower it quite a bit. Hell, lower it an octave and play the bottom four strings on the guitar and it makes a decently convincing acoustic bass if your subs can move some air.


(by the way, I'm not quite the egomaniac that this post makes me out to be...I simply wanted to convey that I think I know what I'm talking about in one very specific area, and that is "LIVE ACOUSTIC/ELECTRIC" sound. These Variax Acoustics are sold as both live AND recording guitars, but I cannot personally recommend them for recording. I will always mic one of my acoustic guitars for recording, but if you don't have a decent acoustic or the knowledge/experience to record one well, then I could see how this guitar would certainly be a better alternative than recording your Takamine from the output jack, lol.

There. Hope this helps some googler someday.
 
So....I guess you expect everyone to say, "Hey, Chris! Thanks for the wonderful, detaled, informative post! You are my hero!"

Hey, Chris, thanks for the great post, you fucking egomaniac! :D
 
WHO IS this guy. Who cares? Not me. And if you want to get AS FAR FROM THE SOUL OF THE MUSIC AS POSSIBLE, get a Variax acoustic. Might as well be playing a keyboard. Strum that digital geegaw, boy!! YEEHAWWW!!!!!
OH,yeah, but it sounds good.............
 
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Hey, Chris! Thanks for the wonderful, detaled, informative post! You are my hero!

I recently got a POD xt Live and am consistently blown away with what it can do. The only bad part is that it's gonna take me like five years to figure it all out.
 
MULEFAN said:
Who cares? Not me. And if you want to get AS FAR FROM THE SOUL OF THE MUSIC AS POSSIBLE, get a Variax acoustic. Might as well be playing a keyboard. Strum that digital geegaw, boy!! YEEHAWWW!!!!!
OH,yeah, but it sounds good.............

Hi there, horsefucker. Lemme' guess...you've never played one, and your last gig involved somebody getting married, right? A close relative, I assume. Possibly your sister/ex-wife?

If you have actual experience with these instruments, then I'll just call you a tonedeaf dumbfuck and tell you that you need more experience...or a hearing aid. If you have (as I suspect) no experience whatsoever with them beyond reading about them on the internet, then I'll let your opinion stand on its own terms.
 
MULEFAN said:
Well- the guy I thought it was had a bio on his webpage that was almost as ego-driven as this guy.Honest mistake.

Steve Z.

hehe... I figured the combination of HUGE EGOCENTRIC statements with anything about a Variax would give this thread the flashpoint that it needs to really take off and turn into a full-fledged flamewar at some point, thereby increasing its google ranking for that guy out there that is considering buying one. Thank you for proving me right...again...and "as usual."

Let's keep slagging me and Variax. :D
 
chrisharris said:
Well, obviously you shouldn't. I mean, the Paul comes with a wicker chair and the other one doesn't? Ferphuxache man, THINK!!! :D

But I already HAVE the Paul AND the wicker chair, so I would only trade the guitar. The Epi is in a local shop, I don't think the owner knows the Paul is supposed to come with a wicker chair ;)
 
c7sus said:
I'm not convinced.

Yeah, but remember, Craig...I'm not working for Line6 here. I'm merely passing on my very valuable opinions to help out those musicians who are already considering the purchase...and by "musicians," I mean guys who play live shows outside of Andover CT and post recordings and stuff. Not you. :D
 
mshilarious said:
But I already HAVE the Paul AND the wicker chair, so I would only trade the guitar. The Epi is in a local shop, I don't think the owner knows the Paul is supposed to come with a wicker chair ;)

My son...guitar purchases should never EVER be about one or the other...rather, they should be about WHICH ONE FIRST. You have the LP, and it shall remain with you. You may feel free to add the epi at your leisure, lol.
 
chrisharris said:
My son...guitar purchases should never EVER be about one or the other...rather, they should be about WHICH ONE FIRST. You have the LP, and it shall remain with you. You may feel free to add the epi at your leisure, lol.

Unfortunately I am not a wealthy lawyer, but a mere peddler of small microphones, so it will be either/or for me, or the Airscreamer will be gone forever :(

Ah heck, I've had the Gibson for six years, it's getting long in the tooth :o
 
mshilarious said:
Unfortunately I am not a wealthy lawyer, but a mere peddler of small microphones, so it will be either/or for me, or the Airscreamer will be gone forever :(

Ah heck, I've had the Gibson for six years, it's getting long in the tooth :o

Man, on the one hand...you have many years of tradition and refinement with the LP (although QC seems to be almost as big an issue with Gibson these days as with my Korean made Variax Acoustic(s))...BUT, just having the work "Airscreamer" on an instrument is sure worth something.

Ok, here's what you do. Keep the LP and put a huge "AIRSCREAMER" bumper sticker across the front...this will allow you to entertain endorsement offers from Epiphone...get the axe for free.

Again, it's not about "which," it's about "which first." :D

Rock the hell on...

...somebody else needs to flame me pretty quickly, though...I'm losing gas here.
 
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