Cow Tipping.

T

The Ghost of FM

Banned
I've never done it myself but I've heard this is considered high comedy to those who have cows in their neighborhood.

What if the cow falls on a rock and dies or badly gets injured?

Should those nasty hooligans get extradited to a county with a hanging judge if the farmer's business address is registered in that county?

Also, what if the cow had a cute name like Elsie instead of just a tag with number on it affixed to its ear via hole puncher?

Should we make a law that all cows come equipped with a fish eye wireless surveillance cameras to safeguard our moo moos from these criminals?

Lastly, is there a way I can legitimately charge these punks fifty five thousand dollars for the opportunity of performing this heinous act by providing them with a map with an X on it?



Cheers! :)
 
The only cow tipping that should be allowed is of the two legged variety. And only when being wingman for a REALLY good friend.
;-)
 
20% and only if they provide excellent service.

Otherwise, bad cow! No tip for you!

:spank:
 
They had cows down the street from where I grew up, even though it was a pretty developed suburb. They were enclosed by a fence with a mild electric current running through it that we used to shock ourselves with by touching... it didn't hurt that bad, but enough that we didn't want to touch it again after we touched it one time. I heard somebody pissed on it once. That story got around and nobody ever pissed on it again.
 
Cow tipping is a myth. Urban legend. It's very unlikely you'll get close enough to a cow to touch it, and even less likely that you could tip one over. They're skittish and they're not featherweights.

I live in Texas and I've never heard of one successful cow-tipping endeavor. I have heard of people getting their ribs caved in from one kick from a cow.
 
Greg_L said:
Cow tipping is a myth. Urban legend. It's very unlikely you'll get close enough to a cow to touch it, and even less likely that you could tip one over. They're skittish and they're not featherweights.

I live in Texas and I've never heard of one successful cow-tipping endeavor. I have heard of people getting their ribs caved in from one kick from a cow.
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I've heard that too but seriously, if you had the right tranquilizer darts and forklift truck or a Bobcat with the right shovel attachment, how hard could it be? :)



Cheers! :)
 
I knew a guy in the navy who said he used to go cow tipping, successfully. I don't know. I believed him then, but have never done it myself. Nor would I care to.
Maybe I need to rethink my perception of his story. Hmmmmm
 
When we had a cottage in Vermont, there was a farm a short distance from our place and as a kid, I was friends with the farmer's kids. We'd often go into the barn where the cows were and walk right up to them to pat their heads or give them a rub on their sides. They cows were all pretty calm and OK with that and actually seemed pretty friendly. Maybe because they were used to the farmer and his kids?



Cheers! :)
 
I don't know, I'm not sneaking up on a cow or bull in the middle of the night. They might be delicious, dopey herbivores, but they weigh 1000+ pounds and like to charge and kick.

If any of you ever decide to try it, make sure it's a female. A bull will fuck your shit up real bad.
 
A milk cow would probably not kill you because they are used to people. I don't know that they'd tip over easily though.

There's a field just a few blocks away from me full of genuine Texas Longhorn cattle. These fuckers got some serious horns on them. I'll see if I can get some pics without dying.
 
Go tip this guy over. And before you die, check out those balls.

9132182_orig.jpg
 
NotThatBright said:
They had cows down the street from where I grew up, even though it was a pretty developed suburb. They were enclosed by a fence with a mild electric current running through it that we used to shock ourselves with by touching... it didn't hurt that bad, but enough that we didn't want to touch it again after we touched it one time. I heard somebody pissed on it once. That story got around and nobody ever pissed on it again.
Click to expand...

I can get to cows a fifteen minute bike ride from here, but they're shutting it down soon, I think. They don't do that shit in the city any more. Not only have I never wanted to piss on their fence, I've never had the least inclination to tip 'em. Or give 'em advice.
 
dobro said:
I can get to cows a fifteen minute bike ride from here, but they're shutting it down soon, I think. They don't do that shit in the city any more. Not only have I never wanted to piss on their fence, I've never had the least inclination to tip 'em. Or give 'em advice.
Click to expand...

You ride a bike, at your age? C'mon, man. You don't even live in Portland, and even they have no excuse.
 
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