I hope I'm not banned for posting this, but...

[MISTERQCUE]

...(and sincere apologies to all you cat-luv'rs out there).....cats, IMHO, make for lousy pets!! I despise these creatures. Sure, they may be cute and cuddly
but they serve no purpose (other than to chase mice) whatsoever.

Here's just a few of my reasons for hatin' on cats:

1)-Cat's are bitchy and sneaky lil' b- - - - - -s.

2)-Most cats hate going outdoors (exception-alley kats)

3)-You can't teach 'em any tricks. Not even the simple "Sit" command.

4)-They're useless to law enforcement/rescue services.

5)-Have you ever seen a "seeing-eye cat"?

6)-They're unpredictable. They'll "purrr" and be cuddly in one moment, then claw your eyes out of it's sockets the next.

7)-Cats are lousy "fashion accessories"! Why is it that you never see celebrities (including celebutards Paris, Britney, Lindsey or Nicole) carrying
cats?

8)-For some inexplicable reason, cats always wait to the last moment to knock over the last of your "medicinal herbs" you're rolling by jumping on your lap, shoulders, etc. .

9)-Cats will never accept you as thier master. Thier overall demeanor and disposition indicates that YOU are only there to serve them.

10)-My "pain-in-the-rectal cavity" sister-in-law is named Kat. 'Nuff said.

This is just a FEW of the many opinions I have against cats.

I've never or ever will own a cat and am not well versed on them as a whole.
However, I've been around these furry,lil f#ckers long enuff to see the crap they try to pull off on thier owners and thier guests.

I'll accept any and all criticisms and am willing to keep an open mind on reasons you guys provide that show the benefits of owning a cat but in the meantime I'll take a snail over a cat any day.

[lbanks]

Cats take great pictures.

[Dragon]

Originally Posted by MISTERQCUE

...(and sincere apologies to all you cat-luv'rs out there).....cats, IMHO, make for lousy pets!! I despise these creatures. Sure, they may be cute and cuddly
but they serve no purpose (other than to chase mice) whatsoever.

Here's just a few of my reasons for hatin' on cats:

1)-Cat's are bitchy and sneaky lil' b- - - - - -s.

Some people say the same about women. That doesn't mean it's true.

2)-Most cats hate going outdoors (exception-alley kats)

You obviously have never known any real cats.

3)-You can't teach 'em any tricks. Not even the simple "Sit" command.

This explains why all circuses have animal trainers with performing dogs, rather than lions, tigers, and other cats, right?

4)-They're useless to law enforcement/rescue services.

So are musicians.

5)-Have you ever seen a "seeing-eye cat"?

Have you ever seen a cat tall enough to work with people the way dogs can?

6)-They're unpredictable. They'll "purrr" and be cuddly in one moment, then claw your eyes out of it's sockets the next.

Some cats are like this. So are many people.

7)-Cats are lousy "fashion accessories"! Why is it that you never see celebrities (including celebutards Paris, Britney, Lindsey or Nicole) carrying
cats?

Because no self-respecting cat would put up with such phony people. I definitely count that as a positive trait.

8)-For some inexplicable reason, cats always wait to the last moment to knock over the last of your "medicinal herbs" you're rolling by jumping on your lap, shoulders, etc.

Maybe they're trying to tell you something. Besides, pot smells a lot like catnip and works the same way on cats. Maybe they want it for themselves!

9)-Cats will never accept you as thier master. Thier overall demeanor and disposition indicates that YOU are only there to serve them.

That's why they're suitable companions for real people and not for folks that just want to be a "master" and therefore have some kind of emotional problem.

10)-My "pain-in-the-rectal cavity" sister-in-law is named Kat. 'Nuff said.

Can't help you there.

This is just a FEW of the many opinions I have against cats.

I've never or ever will own a cat and am not well versed on them as a whole.
However, I've been around these furry,lil f#ckers long enuff to see the crap they try to pull off on thier owners and thier guests.

I'll accept any and all criticisms and am willing to keep an open mind on reasons you guys provide that show the benefits of owning a cat but in the meantime I'll take a snail over a cat any day.

We don't "own" cats. We live with them. They are people and act like people. If you want an obedient drooling servile sycophant, get a dog. If you want a true loyal companion, but someone who will tell you where to stick it when necessary, you'll have to find the right cat.

[the inhabitant]

I used to hate cats. I really hated cats! But then I lived with a girlfriend for about a year who had two cats. Within a month, the cats loved me more than her (she hated me for that). I think part of the reason is that I didn't kiss their asses all the time, trying to get them to cuddle with me etc, so they started assuming I was the dominant cat of the house.

The next thing you know they're trying to cuddle with me all the time. I couldn't watch a minute of TV without them cuddling up to me. The one would lay on my lap and try to crawl up to my chest (sometimes painful) and purr so loud that it sounded almost like a person snoring. The other would lay across my shoulders, rub her cheek against mine (sometimes annoying) and purr.

The shoulder's cat was a rebel. She would walk up to the plant she knew she wasn't supposed to chew on, and look back and forth at me and the plant like, "what are you going to do about it?" Then *yoink* she grabs a leaf off the plant and starts running as I chase her with the squirt bottle. It became one of the many games we'd play that revealed a lot of her personality to me. I fell in love with that cat.

I had my studio in a room that was off limits to cats. As a joke, I hung a "no cats" sign on the door - about 12" off the ground, at cat-eye-level. Being off-limits to the room of course made getting into that room the life-mission of the cats. The fact that they weren't allowed in there made them want to be in there more than anything else in the world. They just assumed they would find some kind of nirvana in there.

One day I left the apartment in a rush and got about five blocks from home when I realized, " THE STUDIO! OH GOD NO! I LEFT THE DOOR OPEN!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!"

I ran home as fast as I could, knowing it would be too late. I knew they were in there, but I was just hoping they weren't chewing on everything (cat nirvana).

About $800 worth of Mogamis were destroyed, along with one high-end Monster (I guess cat's prefer the fine flavor of Mogomis). They managed to chew up four or five knobs on my mixer.

I simply couldn't believe the amount of damage those cats did in 15-20 minutes.

I understood the personality of both cats very well by this point. And I knew that had they not been off limits to that room, they would never have ransacked the place the way they did. But because they were off-limits for so long, they assumed there must be some kind of heaven in there. And heaven to a cat is stuff to chew on and holes to crawl into, so they must have found the cabinets full of cables and thought, "This is what we've been waiting for all of these cat-years".

When I got home, they both scurried off into their best hiding places - those well established as the ones I had the most trouble getting them out of. They knew they were in trouble. Big freaking trouble! I was flipping couches and box-springs about; slamming doors shut to eliminate possible routes of escape; and squirting the squirt-bottle like a mad man.

I eventually got a hold of each of them, pinned them to the ground and squirted the hell out of them right in the face with the squirt-gun until the bottle needed re-filling; then locked them in the closet for hours before their whining finally convinced me to let them out.

After all of that, they still didn't learn their lesson; they wanted into the studio just as much as ever. THAT'S the thing I hate about cat's; that and the fact that they are pretty unintelligent compared to dogs. They don't learn many - if any - words; one of them didn't even know her own name. And they simply never understood the concept of pointing; they would just sniff my finger every time I tried to point out something to them.

After a couple days of snubbing their snuggle attempts, I finally forgave them. They're just so freaking cute. Go ahead and call me a wuss. They're just so damned cute.

[MISTERQCUE]

Originally Posted by Dragon

Some people say the same about women. That doesn't mean it's true.



You obviously have never known any real cats.

Wasssup my bruh' Dragonian Dave!

To some extent, I agree with the above.
Basically, my dealings with these critters stem from visiting friends and family members who have/had them. Friskys have always come off to me as selfish animals still harboring that savage, "jungle-istic-predatory" instinct that thier cousins from the wilds of Africa have evidenced by it's sneaky habit of creeping up on a person then pouncing on it's victim. One of my cousin's has a pitbull (whose head is larger than my entire body) and a 2-yr old siamese who is more imposing than the pit (mofo jumped on my daughter's should 2 month's ago digging her claws into her arm; my daughter slapped the living PISS outta' that cat-she hates cats also).
The closest I ever came to having any kind of rel'tion-shp' with a cat was
last summer at my old house where a stray ,white kitten ventured into my backyard and made it his home. Weak, tired & yes....somewhat cute, either my wife, daughter or myself would put out a bowl of milk or a small plate of tuna on the back porch. "Snowball", as my d'ghter called, it would only approach the food when we were outta' sight. After a while, it started to trust us and would climb the 2nd step of the porch to feed on the food with us in plain site. Over the 2-3 several weeks, Snoball gained the confidence to
come to the top of the porch and waited for his sched'ld feeding from us and after finishing, give us a few purrs, meows and a look of gratitude.
Then 1 Saturday afternoon, my nephew left the backdoor open to go out to the yard to play and Sno-f#ckin'-Ball came thru the bk-dr into the kitchen & decided he was the new ruler of this indoor domain. This mofo chased my daughter into the computer room, attacked my leather sofa, knocked down figurines, portraits and a vase on the coffee table. My sis chased after it where he ran into my bedroom took a quick sh#t, made a U-turn and darted past my sister. hering the commotion, I came up from the basement and saw the freakin' sh#thole in my daughter's bedroom. I closed the door so it wouldn't escape making this a mano-y-mano battle to the death. Ma'f#cka' snarled at me then went into the "Crouching Tiger-Hidden Dragon" attack stance ready to pounce. I grabbed my daughter's track trophy of her dresser and hurled that jammy right at it. Clocked that mofo in the cranium with it send that b - - - -h to la-la land. Put mofo in a bag then flung it's crazee-@ss in wire rim street garbage can down the block. "Purrrr". "Meooow". "Ain't I so cute". Bullsh#t! Mofo flipped the script thinking he was gonna' come in my house and run things believing he got over by conning us with cute looks
and a friendly disposition.
I'm tellin' you, cats know how to play the game! Can't trust 'em!

Watch out!

[jrhager84]

Just a little observation:

Dragon, you threaten banning against anybody who abuses your special cat forum, yet you have no problem calling dogs (which I happen to own 2) "drooling sycophants"?...explain to me how that is unbiased? I respect your admiration of your pet(s), so please reciprocate...I couldn't help but post this: (yet another example or misled assumptions and poo-flinging.

"Cats are independant...This intimidates a lot of guys who want "an obedient animal" (which is usually code for a dog or woman they can beat and thereby feel manly and stuff like that)."

I mean........c'mon

I also can't help but chuckle at your inability to accept that you are your pet's master. Who pays for it? Who feeds it? Who keeps it safe? Since when did "master" become so derogatory?

Master - The owner or keeper of an animal (http://www.thefreedictionary.com/master)

Every sheep needs a shepherd, and every cat/dog (domesticated of course) requires a suitable "master" to take complete and total responsibility for it, unless we want 10 million feral cats and dogs running around...or does your cat foot half the rent?

What I'm saying is don't cut off your nose to spite your face regarding dog-lovers. They're not mutually exclusive you know... I may not prefer cats, but I wouldn't destroy them all either, yet it seems your love for your cats only fuels your hate for dogs (or more appropriately, their "roommates").

If you'll excuse me....my wife needs beating

[MISTERQCUE]

Originally Posted by jrhager84

Just a little observation:

Dragon, you threaten banning against anybody who abuses your special cat forum, yet you have no problem calling dogs (which I happen to own 2) "drooling sycophants"?...explain to me how that is unbiased?

.........because he owns this site and can do whatever he want's to do!

If I owned this site I would have a "Hillary for Prez" forum and if one didn't like it or complained not only would they be banned but thier nipples would be twisted until they express their undying allegiance to her.

[ausrock]

Originally Posted by MISTERQCUE

...(and sincere apologies to all you cat-luv'rs out there).....cats, IMHO, make for lousy pets!! I despise these creatures. Sure, they may be cute and cuddly
but they serve no purpose (other than to chase mice) whatsoever.

Here's just a few of my reasons for hatin' on cats:

1)-Cat's are bitchy and sneaky lil' b- - - - - -s.

2)-Most cats hate going outdoors (exception-alley kats)

3)-You can't teach 'em any tricks. Not even the simple "Sit" command.

4)-They're useless to law enforcement/rescue services.

5)-Have you ever seen a "seeing-eye cat"?

6)-They're unpredictable. They'll "purrr" and be cuddly in one moment, then claw your eyes out of it's sockets the next.

7)-Cats are lousy "fashion accessories"! Why is it that you never see celebrities (including celebutards Paris, Britney, Lindsey or Nicole) carrying
cats?

8)-For some inexplicable reason, cats always wait to the last moment to knock over the last of your "medicinal herbs" you're rolling by jumping on your lap, shoulders, etc. .

9)-Cats will never accept you as thier master. Thier overall demeanor and disposition indicates that YOU are only there to serve them.

10)-My "pain-in-the-rectal cavity" sister-in-law is named Kat. 'Nuff said.

This is just a FEW of the many opinions I have against cats.

I've never or ever will own a cat and am not well versed on them as a whole.
However, I've been around these furry,lil f#ckers long enuff to see the crap they try to pull off on thier owners and thier guests.

I'll accept any and all criticisms and am willing to keep an open mind on reasons you guys provide that show the benefits of owning a cat but in the meantime I'll take a snail over a cat any day.

Yeah, I reckon I could apply a lot of that to some people on HR as well

[legionserial]

Originally Posted by MISTERQCUE

1)Cat's are bitchy and sneaky lil' b- - - - - -s.

Like people

2)-Most cats hate going outdoors (exception-alley kats)

I don't understand that. Most cats love going outdoors. I've never known one that stays indoors unless their owner insist on it. Maybe it's different in the UK. A majority of cats are outdoors cats over here. And what's more, you don't have to put them on a lead, they can go out on their own, because they are smart enough to come back. My cat gets majorly pissed off if he can't get out. He was out for about 10 hours solid last night-this morning. He always comes back though.

3)-You can't teach 'em any tricks. Not even the simple "Sit" command.

Like most people, they aren't dumb enough to be exploited like performing animals. You can teach them a few things though. you just have to gain their respect first. Shouting 'sit' at them, won't earn you their respect.

4)-They're useless to law enforcement/rescue services.

See previous about not being dumb enough to be exploited like performing animals.

5)-Have you ever seen a "seeing-eye cat"?

Again, cats arent performing animals. however useful and worthwhile that performing animal may be.

6)-They're unpredictable. They'll "purrr" and be cuddly in one moment, then claw your eyes out of it's sockets the next.

Like people, except they can't kill you.

7)-Cats are lousy "fashion accessories"! Why is it that you never see celebrities (including celebutards Paris, Britney, Lindsey or Nicole) carrying
cats?

Performing animals again

8)-For some inexplicable reason, cats always wait to the last moment to knock over the last of your "medicinal herbs" you're rolling by jumping on your lap, shoulders, etc.

Whereas a dog will just eat them.

9)-Cats will never accept you as thier master. Thier overall demeanor and disposition indicates that YOU are only there to serve them.

They like to be treated as equals. Like people. Amd anyway, my cat knows who I am. He follows me everywhere and brings me presents.

10)-My "pain-in-the-rectal cavity" sister-in-law is named Kat. 'Nuff said.

Can't fault that one. My last ex was also named Kat.

[Dogman]

[ausrock]

Originally Posted by legionserial

I don't understand that. Most cats love going outdoors. I've never known one that stays indoors unless their owner insist on it. Maybe it's different in the UK. A majority of cats are outdoors cats over here.

Our cats, apart from having been bred to be more "indoors oriented" have never been outside unless we are with them and are virtually not interested in going past the doorstep. Unfortunately, other cats owners around here don't seem to care as I regularly see two specific cats (with collars) passing through our back yard on their hunting expeditions.

[mixsit]

Originally Posted by MISTERQCUE

9)-Cats will never accept you as thier master. Thier overall demeanor and disposition indicates that YOU are only there to serve them.

That's right. One of the reasons cat is cool is it won't just 'roll over' for ya.

On the other hand dogs are 'cause they will.


We're playing a little game lately where kitty gets to steal the spare mic shock mount bands off the Mackie overnight and I find them all over the house the next morning.

[jrhager84]

Originally Posted by MISTERQCUE

.........because he owns this site and can do whatever he want's to do!

If I owned this site I would have a "Hillary for Prez" forum and if one didn't like it or complained not only would they be banned but thier nipples would be twisted until they express their undying allegiance to her.

You don't create a forum with a certain set of rules only to be "above" said standard. Rules are to be universally applicable, otherwise how could somebody respect the rules to begin with (more so the person who created those rules)?

[MISTERQCUE]

Originally Posted by jrhager84

You don't create a forum with a certain set of rules only to be "above" said standard. Rules are to be universally applicable, otherwise how could somebody respect the rules to begin with (more so the person who created those rules)?

.....his site, his rules! Don't like it, create your own site or prove to him that Generalissimo Francisco is still dead....that mite make him want to lick your toes and profess his undying luv for chicken and waffles!
Look dude, I've been a member here since 1974 and I still believe that Ethel Merman was the 1st Cro-magnum to walk the moon! When Dragonian Dave and Al Gore started this website back in '57, thier intentions were to provide a forum where meth-heads and "Lord of the Ring" fans can meet each other &
perform male-on-beast porn sex! However, with the invention of the napkin & beer, toilet bowls never rec'd the recognition as the power tool of the decade. When Woody Allen told rapper 50 cent to appear in the French production of "Caligula" he was directing for ESPN, Michael Vick was the answer to "Who Let The Dogs Out"! Mary had a little lamb....smothered in heroin and barbeque sauce which No. Korea used in to create it's Taep-Dong ballistic missle!!!! Follow me? Urine is found on the toilet seat put there by armadillos whose diet consists of discarded vintage '58 Les pauls and cranberry juice is the new anthrax.

Now do you understand?
I hope so 'cause I broke it down for you in layman's term!

[ez_willis]

Cats hate black people. Don't take it personal.

[ez_willis]

Originally Posted by ez_willis

Cats hate black people. Don't take it personal.

I say that because it's as retarded to hate the species because of your own experiences with a handful of cats.

That don't mean I don't want you to twist my nipples, I'm just saying.

[MISTERQCUE]

Originally Posted by ez_willis

Cats hate black people. Don't take it personal.

Yo' eeeeeeeze, I just wanna sincerely thankyou for giving the wif-ee and daughter a good, hearty-party laff on the use of your prev avatar!!!

They luv'd it!!!!


Thx & luv ya' man!!

[ez_willis]

Originally Posted by MISTERQCUE

Yo' eeeeeeeze, I just wanna sincerely thankyou for giving the wif-ee and daughter a good, hearty-party laff on the use of your prev avatar!!!

They luv'd it!!!!


Thx & luv ya' man!!

Much love, bro! Glad I could bring a smile to their faces. Hope all is well with you and yours!

[MISTERQCUE]

Originally Posted by ez_willis

Much love, bro! Glad I could bring a smile to their faces. Hope all is well with you and yours!

Everythang's all goooooooooooooood......................

[jrhager84]

..............so what you're telling me is he absolutely REFUSES to call himself his cat's master, but he has no hesitation in being OUR master? Now that's not hypocritical...

I applaud your undying allegiance to Dragon though. It's very cute...

[ausrock]

Originally Posted by jrhager84

..............so what you're telling me is he absolutely REFUSES to call himself his cat's master, but he has no hesitation in being OUR master? Now that's not hypocritical...

No..........Dragon, to use your terms, is overall master of this forum...........it is entirely own own individual choice as to whether we want to participate here under Dragon's terms or not. Personally, if it were my "domain" I would have kicked some serious arse around here a long time ago..........but that's just me

[Gorty]

Originally Posted by jrhager84

..............so what you're telling me is he absolutely REFUSES to call himself his cat's master, but he has no hesitation in being OUR master? Now that's not hypocritical...

I applaud your undying allegiance to Dragon though. It's very cute...

LOSER...........LOSER..............LOSER!

Recognise those words loser?

[jrhager84]

That still implies he's a "master". Masters control, and if he controls US and not his cat, my point still has validity.

To Boss Hogg:
Kiss my ass......Recognize THOSE words?

I can't help but laugh at your immaturity. How old are you again? Your comment reminded me of Jan from the Brady Bunch "MARSHA MARSHA MARSHA MARSHA!" LMFAO

Also:
Not once has Dragon spoken for himself, so unless you guys are interconnected through some type of brain-infusion, I'd ask that you all remain quiet and let the man speak for himself.....Thanks!

........and thanks for the neg rep Boss Hogg. You just prove to me that idiots are everywhere, completely willing to share their unimportant and irrelevant 2 cents...and I fully expect you to neg rep me the next time you can. It's ok, neg rep me all you want. The fact that your disapproval stems from me not merely falling in line and perpetuating sheep mentality only proves my point. If you like being a drone, look into Scientology. They always need help protecting the universe.......lol

Anywho, I'd like to ask Dragon to step in and set everything straight. It was a serious question/observation, and would politely request that you provide me with your opinion...thanks.

Peace out y'all!

Love,

-Joel

[Dogman]

[boingoman]

Originally Posted by jrhager84

It was a serious question/observation,

There's your problem. Skip the whole serious part, you'll sleep better.