eek, umm mixed a new tune, feedback please

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ok ok, now that it's posted up there for whoever to see,
i,m listening and going......oh my god i posted that!
my ears r telling me that my vocals r too loud, too flat,too rushed, and way too tired,,,,the hit-hats r too loud, the beginning guitar is not bright enough, maybe i shouldn't have strummed with my fingers eh!!!,,,i know one big reason for my flat vocals r because when i'm recording using the computers mic, i have these little headphones as a monitor of the instruments, my vocals r not in the headphones with the instruments, i have one earphone on to hear the instruments, and one off of my ear to concentrate on my vocals,,ahhhhhhh arrrrrrrrrrrr rrrrrrrr lol, anyways, man i wish i had an electric guitar lol,,,,so that's what i think, what do u guys think? anybody? http://www.mp3.com/Montra
looking forward to yer real honest feedback, can't get better unless yer honest,,,,,,,peace geesh, i had to come back in here to letcha know what tune i'm rambling on about ,,,,,it's "rain"..............

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sorry anyone who might check out the mix, i have taken the page down, i'm trading my computer for a generator as i need it for the winter because i live a ways outta town, lots of power outs where i live, unfortunately i can't have both right at the moment,,ahh the sound sucked anyways, lol, the soundblaster, computer mic, and lack of a way in with the guitar all have drivin' me nuts when listening to my tunes,,,,,,,,ahhhhhhh santa claus u listening out there? lol
maybe mrs claus is......anyways c u guys in about 3 months er so,,,,,,,,,,,thanx to the best site on the net!!!!!!!for bein' here, and to all u guys posting,boasting,toasting, and roasting........right on!!!!
peace )