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#1
10-22-2005
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Stifled creativity. Inspiration. I feel like dying.
So, I'm pretty fresh out of college.
I'm in a well paying 9 to 5 job ($25/hr.). This is really my first dive into the normal schedule working world. I have been working at this particular job for a month and a half now. Tonight, I attempted to write some music, as I hadn't had a chance to do any in awhile. After 3 hours coming up only with things I hated, I have decided that 9 to 5 has killed any creativity that I had. This sounds dumb, spoiled, and probably a hundred other things. But has this happened to anyone else? How do you deal with it? What is some of your everyday inspiration? I am so depressed at this point. Holy hell.
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This is beautiful. THIS IS ART. I love Pig Destroyer. 
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#2
10-22-2005
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Try to be positive. Another 45 years and you can retire. You'll have plenty of time for inspiration then.
Good luck!
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#3
10-22-2005
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I don't know, man. I've experienced both sides of this.
For the past five years I've been a writer and editor for Hal Leonard, and I work from home. I make my own schedule, blah blah blah. Sounds ideal, huh? It's not. At the moment I'm looking for a 9-5. I like doing the HL thing, and I plan on continuing it as supplimental income, but the problem is that I never get to "leave work." It's always there. I ALWAYS have the opportunity to work more, so it's kind of always eating at me in the back of my head. I don't get to clock out, go home, and forget about work for the rest of the day. I know everyone's different, but the grass is always greener too. That's just my two cents.
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famous beagle
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#4
10-22-2005
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Well, my situation is a little bit different. I graduated highschool at 16 and just finished up college (I'm 19 now), so right now it's more of a 'do I want a 9 to 5 job making great money or something that makes me unbelievably happy with a crap job that I will probably hate' kind of thing, where there so far hasn't been a happy medium. Maybe I should go back to school and work on my masters? College always lends plenty of time to music. This is all just frustrating. Then I started thinking about paying for college. That would mean another loan. Then I fully realized the notion that no one will ever be truly out of debt and I'm pondering leaving town and staying on the road forever. That seems like a good idea. But then again, very idiotic things seem like good ideas at 19.
This has taken an awful tangent. It is 1:21 AM EST.
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This is beautiful. THIS IS ART. I love Pig Destroyer.
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#5
10-23-2005
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Man, you got it rough! Still having Mom do the laundry and making $25/hr. I remember back in the day you needed to actually know how to do something before they'd pay you that much. Have you considered writing the Blues or something? I'm gonna throw some titles at you to see if I can get those creative juices flowing. Ready, here we go- 1. Overachiever Blues 2. Worried About You(My Financial Future  )3. I Need a Happy Medium(All I got was a Miserable Extra Large) 4. Blues for too Many Options 5 A Lifetime in Front of Me 6. Decisions, Decisions, Decisions!  You should either quit doing drugs or start doing drugs, which is it?
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#6
10-23-2005
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Well to someone who works most of thier life trying to get a $25/hr job, yeah....your situation does sound a bit whiny. You've only had it for a month, and are complaining that it's "getting in the way of your music"? It must be nice to be able to piss away a $25/hr job, because it's interfering with your music. For a lot of people, their $10/hr job interferes with their entire life. I'm sure you're probably a pretty nice guy though. Maybe a bit sheltered. You're not one of those kids from "From the Top", are you?
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THIS MACHINE KILLS HIPPIES
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#7
10-23-2005
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Tough time. Growing up SUCKS no matter how cushy the job is.
You got a head start, too- I graduated college in my early 20's so I had a few more years of playtime before I had to get down to work. And it sucked. I found a career and job that I liked but didn't pay much. I worked my @ss off, enjoyed my work... but didn't have much time or inspiration to write new music. I think I didn't really write much for 3 or 4 years. The cool thing, though, was that I could finally afford to buy a thing or two. A condensor mic... a compressor... a mixer... It takes a little while to get it down, but the 9 to 5 isn't killing you. YOU are killing yourself because you haven't yet learned to keep yourself alive. Keeping yourself happy and healthy is a lot more than just putting food on the table. It takes a while to figure out what you need to do to keep yourself happy and inspired. For me (and its different for everyone) it was taking walks, getting to know the plants and animals around where I lived, spending as much time outside as I could. For some reason that kept me feeling alive and inspired. I also got really into getting to know the people I worked with and enjoying my interactions with them at work. My line of work made that easy. Keep a journal. Write about what you're feeling and what's going on for you. I don't care what you write, JUST DO IT. The act of writing anything regulalry will help you sort through your depression AND will keep your mind flowing in the mode of creativity. I don't journal as much any more but it kept me alive when I was going through the same thing you are. I also made an effort to keep learning new things. I'd sit down with the studio stuff to just start using some new technique or trick I'd read about and figure it out. That would be my excuse to MAKE time for music and not care too much about writing the next great hit. Between learning something new and just spending some time with my hands on the guitar... I would regulalry stumble across stuff that inspired me. It takes a while to figure out, but I *love* being an adult, living on my own and making my own choices. Yeah, you're a bit whiney- at least you COULD save up enough making that kind of money to take a year off and go wander. And that might be a good idea if you're *sure* you will never be happy on the path you're on now. I'd say give it at least a year, though. For one, if you stay at a job for at least a year it doesn't look as bad on your resume when you try to get a job later. For two, give yourself the chance to learn how to live this way. Its a skill that takes time to learn like any other- and its a really damned important skill. And props for knowing that "very idiotic things seem like good ideas at 19." With that statement alone I know that you have enough insight to figure this out. I didn't learn how stupid I was until my mid-20's.  Take care, Chris
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#8
10-23-2005
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Get Laid. Inspiration abounds.
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#9
10-23-2005
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What makes you so special? The entire world has to work to make a living,and this has been going on forever,now you want to complain about it? I have zero sympathy for you,If I have any emotion at all towards you it would be envy.You've got the world by the balls and yet you don't realise it. It sounds like you've been pampered your whole life and now at the ripe old age of 19 you've gotten you first taste of reality. Suck it up buttercup,you are coming off as a real pussy. Tough love brother,something you obviously did'nt get from your parents.
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#10
10-23-2005
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I'll make a deal with ya.
PM me and I'll give you my address where you can send all your money to. Then you will be broke and have a reason to be depressed. Is Paris Hilton your sister? Dave
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CanalCam Time is never wasted if you're wasted all the time Florida, God's waiting room.
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#11
10-23-2005
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Yeah, I kind of figured that I'd get a lot of this response.
I come from a poor family. I've worked my ass off in various jobs to put myself through college and am now way over my head in debt. Read that. I have worked my ass off, studied my ass off, and generally put myself through hell to get where I am today. What were you doing at 19? I really don't need to explain myself to any of you, it was just a question of if anyone else had ever been in the same situation, where they really couldn't find inspiration anymore because of something or other. I'm sure a lot of you are just talking out your asses because you wish that you could have been making that kind of money at 19. The thing is, it's not at all about the money. I plan on keeping this job for as long as it takes to get my equipment built up to a decent level (I have been using sub-par equipment for awhile now, sans the two Deltas and Athlon64 system I had been saving for for 3 years) and then starting a full-time studio or going on tour with whatever band I might be in at the time. So, you can think that I'm spoiled, live at home (uh, I don't see where that came from), and whatever else. But just because that's what you did at 19, doesn't mean that's what other people do. Thanks to anyone who actually gave some real input on the question. I appreciate it and will definitely try out some of the suggestions.
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This is beautiful. THIS IS ART. I love Pig Destroyer.
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#12
10-23-2005
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You say you're depressed,then you try in rub it in peoples faces? If people don't feel sorry for you you want to lash out at them? I think your problem is the fact that you are 19. You need to grow up and be thankful for what you've got. Creativity and inspiration aren't like a water faucet that can be turned on and off.When it comes it comes. If you had asked a question like"How tdo you stimulate creativity and inspiration?"and left out the feeling sorry for yourself part maybe you would've got more productive responses. BTW,lots of people work their asses off,it's part of life.If you continue doing it,chances are you will be rewarded.You need to be a little more patient.
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#13
10-23-2005
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#14
10-23-2005
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#15
10-23-2005
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What did you do for inspiration before you hit the 3 hour rut? As for me, I never have and never will be struck with moments of inspiration where an idea for lyrics comes to me while in a restaraunt so I scribble them on a napkin. I get into the studio and work work work. Sometimes for more than 3 hours at a time!  Now, to take it back a step, you said you worked your ass off to put yourself through college, yet you also said that it wasn't until you got a full time job that you lost inspiration? Which is it?
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#16
10-23-2005
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Honestly, I must admit that this thread has become much too harsh. Yes, a $50K/year job is a great success fresh out of college, even more so at 19. I'll have a master's and won't make that much. Quite frankly though, I pity anyone who finished their college experience at 19. Take a step back gentleman, and realize for a moment that this individual really has no peers. How many people can relate to finishing college by 19? How many people can relate to graduating high school at 16?
I certainly admit that the first post was of an "I feel sorry for myself" sentiment. Honestly though, there's a reason "money doesn't buy happiness" is such a cliche. This forum has always been a great place for musicians to help each other with every aspect of our art. It should always be our goal to do so. This thread falls far short of achieving such.
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Keep making music; --Sean
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#17
10-23-2005
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You might find that your depressing lack of inspiration yields an incredible amount of inspiration, odd as it sounds.
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Keep making music; --Sean
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#18
10-23-2005
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Well this kid needs to get his perspective back inline.He says he's from a poor family and he's bitching about having to work a good job. I work fifty+ hours a week and have a family,that doesn't leave much time for playing,recording,writing,etc... The thing is,you've got to work with the situation you've got and you've got to have priorities.If I were to choose between being able to write a song,or having a good job,I'll take the good job...not to say you can't have both,which seems to ge the jist of his post. I've said to myself on several occasions that I'd set aside some time to write a song and it rarely ever works that way.When it comes it comes.For me it's usually while driving or maybe while I'm at work.Some songs come in fifteen minutes,some over months. If I'm not feeling creative I play other peoples songs,just to stay in practice and get loosened up.Feeling that you have to write something because you've set aside time to do so is just putting undue pressure on yourself,if it's not fun it's not going to happen. If you feel pressure to produce songs you may as well have a normal job anyways.
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#19
10-23-2005
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Azraelswings pretty much hit the nail on the head. Anyway, I'm over it. I wasn't trying to brag, just explaining a little more into my situation, and apparently I shouldn't want to have the freedom to play music and not have to work all the time at 19. Oh boy, all those rumors about having fun through college must have been lies. I must relay this to the others.
Blah blah blah can a mod delete this thread or something? It's drawing the bitter backbone of the internet.
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This is beautiful. THIS IS ART. I love Pig Destroyer.
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#20
10-23-2005
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I think you can delete it by deletling your first post.
FWIW I have *way*more fun now than I did in college or any years previous to this one. The first few years on my own sucked, but it gets better quickly enough. Keep paying attention to how you feel and try to figure out what makes you feel that way. Often work has *nothing* to do with what actually inspires you. Its up to you to figure out what you need. Then you have to figure out how to get it. You are actually in a way better situation to do that than most anyone I know anywhere near your age, though I don't doubt that's a pretty high stress $25/hr. No one in NC pays that much unless there is a bit of pressure involved. Welcome to adulthood. My condolences and congratulations. Take care, Chris
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#21
10-23-2005
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#22
10-23-2005
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xtjdx. It seems a lot of people here are hating your success, fuck em. I've noticed that if you don't situate yourself with the masses in a boring pile of shit with everyone on the same page in their life, and all with their heads up their asses, you don't fit in. In other words, anyone outside the clump of shit that does something with their lives and looks for answers to questions that are meant to be answered, not questioned, is attacked on a personal level without any attention to the question at hand. Personally, I feel what you're saying. You are an intelligent young adult who finished college early and is now working a job which you are afraid might take over your life, your creativity, your pleasures. You don't have a wife or kids so you are at a position where you have to seperate your childhood dreams of making music with the real world complexities. You are facing a dilemma. Since you are so young, you have been accelerated into an lifestile that people older than you are experiencing at the same time. Shit, it ain't fair. The biggest inspiration I see in your life is life itself. I think whatever situation you're in, you can find something to talk about. If you feel depressed, use it in a positive way by writing about it, composing music about it. That will aleviate your stress and help you create a possible masterpiece. The greatest works are created when a person is either ecstatic about something or in deep pain. You don't have to be a music master to know this. All the people on this forum who replied harshly by attacking your personal successes are losers. They are indeed envious. I guess that's what you don't want to become right? Sometimes having too many options too early is hard. When you have only a couple of options, at least you don't have the regret of thinking what else you could have done instead of what you are already doing.
My advice, keep doing what you're doing. Use your emotions, whether negative or positive, to make music. That will be the difference between making a forced "sit down and work" song, and a natural talent inspired song.l
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#23
10-23-2005
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3 entries found for paragraph.
par·a·graph n. 1. A distinct division of written or printed matter that begins on a new, usually indented line, consists of one or more sentences, and typically deals with a single thought or topic or quotes one speaker's continuous words. 2. A mark ( ¶ ) used to indicate where a new paragraph should begin or to serve as a reference mark. 3. A brief article, notice, or announcement, as in a newspaper.
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#24
10-23-2005
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Unless you end up getting a deal, then your a corporate bitch. That is one level below corporate slave. Good luck!
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#25
10-23-2005
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Don't sweat it ez, I got a 750 on the reading part of the SAT's and a 99% on my English placement exams in my senior year of hich school. Blow me. Maybe you can find another possible thesaurus definition for that?
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