critique my presskit plz

[seismetr0n]

i'd really appreciate it if a couple ppl could take a look at my lil presskit (online) and let me know how far off/on target i am.

http://schweinhunden.net/press.htm

pre-thanks

[azraelswings]

Originally Posted by seismetr0n

i'd really appreciate it if a couple ppl could take a look at my lil presskit (online) and let me know how far off/on target i am.

http://schweinhunden.net/press.htm

pre-thanks

I would remove the "Online Press Kit" at the top. I'm assuming anyone looking at this clicked a link explaining it was a press kit. At the very least I'd remove "Online," anyone looking realizes its a web-page.

I would remove the "etc" and make a few other subtle changes, here's an idea:

Schweinhunden is a 4-piece Hardcore/Thrash band from Athens, Ohio. Schweinhunden formed in late 2003 and are now performing in support of their debut CD HumanExtinction, a blistering 12 tracks in 20 minutes. Whether performing frequently at The Union in Athens, or opening for such national touring acts Darkest Hour, The Toasters, The Fuze, or The Classic Struggle, Schweinhunden put on a live show that is always a high energy face melting experience. Influenced by such (genre name here) greats as GBH, Slayer, Discharge, and Suicidal Tendencies, Schweinhunden keeps things fast and loud. Armed with riveting originals and covers including S.O.D, The Minutemen, Dead Kennedys, and Naked Raygun, Schweinhunden is now spreading their influence in a take-over attempt of North America.

At least, that's how I'd write it.

Instead of "Current Image for AD's, articles, and such:" I would write "HumanExtinction Publicity Image" or similar.

Finally, the text along the bottom is very chunky, and its probably best to put contact info at the top, including a contact person, mailing address, phone and email. So I guess what I'm saying is: add an address.

Please note that this are only my ideas and opinions and should be regarded as such. Good luck with all your promo.

[seismetr0n]

thanks azrealswings
.. if you dont mind i might actually use what youve written verbatum, it sounds a lot better than mine.. much better flow.
i will probably change much of what you mentioned as well.. if you get a chance, how about a critique of the main page as well

http://www.schweinhunden.net


thanks

[Robertt8]

you're going to want a band photo in there somewhere.

venues played helps too

good luck!

[azraelswings]

Originally Posted by seismetr0n

thanks azrealswings
.. if you dont mind i might actually use what youve written verbatum, it sounds a lot better than mine.. much better flow.
i will probably change much of what you mentioned as well.. if you get a chance, how about a critique of the main page as well

http://www.schweinhunden.net


thanks

Yeah man, go ahead and use it. Just hit me with a rep point or something I'd like a credit and maybe a link if I had a site to promote, but I don't at the moment, so fuck it.

About the site, it seems pretty groovy all around. Few ideas:

1. I would remove the "Flyers page: all scanned flyers and artwork" and just leave it at "Flyers and Artwork."

2. Fix that pic link in the media section

3. I would reorganize the bottom half of the media section: have a header that says "Music" or "Albums - Complete with Track Samples" or some such line. Also, I'd just put Human Extinction on top since its newest, and use the name of the album for the link that you're using "New CD page = HERE" for. Last, I'd use something like "Listen to the title track from our new album HumanExtinction." I'd use "title track" for the link.

4. I'd move the links section to a separate page.

5. Member Bio's? Band Bio?

6. I'd rewrite the thing at the bottom of the shows section, so its more of a reminder to check the website.

7. I'd reorganize the bottom so that the contact and presskit links were the same size and font, on the same line, but opposite sides.

8. See how it looks without that table border. It may look better, may look worse, give it a shot and see.

Just my ideas, take 'em for what they're worth.

[azraelswings]

oh, and you'll wanna change "(genre name here)" on the press kit to whatever you'd like to call the genre of your influences

[seismetr0n]

i like how i didnt even notice the "(genre name here)".. thats sweet,

thanks for the other comments as well, i will do some upgrading tonite