"The River Queen" featuring Teddie Tapawan for critique...

[Ben Walter]

Please have a listen... this is a colaboration with fellow homerecording.com artist Teddie Tapawan helping out on vocals... It has been the subject of several posts in the MP3 forum:
http://homerecording.com/ubb/Forum15/HTML/000481.html

What do you think of the songwriting?? I would like a critique of it from this standpoint. Thanks, Ben

Look for The River Queen here: www.mp3.com/benwalter

[gibs]

As I mentioned in the mp3 forum, I dig this song...the slide is so nice and Teddie's vocal addition so good....now, in my opinion for this song to be radio friendly (if you intended to pitch it) the intro is too long before the vocal arrives...otherwise, the song is very well crafted musically and lyrically...this is just a viewpoint from somebody who has been known to pitch songs, mind you, and my comments should in no way take away from the artistic intent of the composition...this is a well written song...gibs

[Ben Walter]

Thanks for the comment, gibs... and thanks to this digital world we live in, cutting out the bulk of the intro might be achievable... I think I'll try it to see if it can be done seamlessly... any tips to help me out here?? thanks, Ben

[gibs]

Hey Ben, I was outta town today..I personally think it would be cool to have the first 10 seconds of the song as it is now, then the vocals coming in...I guess this could be done with editing/pasting in a software program like Cool Edit or Vegas?...those first ten seconds really set the mood quickly plus the guitar sounds so good......but hey this is just my opinion...I loved the song period, my comments were only my thoughts on potential air play.....gibs

[Ben Walter]

After another pass through, that was where I saw the cut happening too... I'm not sure if I'll have success but I think I'll try it anyway, for fun