As The Evening Rushes By

[rguagenti]

This is an acoustic number and my first post in many months.

http://www.nowhereradio.com/artists/?aid=3697/singles

I have posted the lyrics in the songwriting board about a week or two ago, but if you care, I have posted them here for your convenience.As the Evening Rushes By

As the evening rushes by
Voices sing their lullabye
Nighttime shadows fall on me
As I sink into my deep sleep
Dreaming dreams I’ll never live
When the morning comes I’ll give

And the morning crashes down
But it doesn’t make a sound
Memories are all I take
As I learn from my mistakes
So I open up my eyes
And I put on my disguise

Things just seems so out of place
As the sunshine burns my face
The more things change, they stay the same
Win the battle, lose the game
So I hurry home again
And feel the comfort from within

I get to do it all again
When tomorrow rushes in
When tomorrow rushes in
When tomorrow rushes in

[Analytical Man]

This is not my kinda music, but i can respect the arrangement, and ideas. Nice song, nice lyrics, great vocal ideas. My only complaint are the vocals in a few spots seem to wave in and out of key. I think a touch more work on the vocals delivery and you will have it nailed.

[CanopuS]

You say its "stripped down" but I would lose all the MIDI effects and things. A lot of the harmonies you produce clutter the mix and could be easily reproduced on guitar. The vocals have too much FX on them in my opinion. I'd love to hear it as just a basic acoustic and voice song. It's a nice tune

[rguagenti]

Thanks guys.

A fresh set of ears always helps?

I am going to leave it as an acoustic, maybe bring the bass and tambourine to the background a bit more and lose the synth and other stuff going on.

The vox need a bit strengthening as well. I knew that going in.

I did want the FX that heavy to give it an echoey, in the canyon, feel reminiscent of a spaghetti western type of mood. Maybe not, huh?? I'll lighten the FX a bit to see how it sounds.

Thanks for your help in this.

[bsanfordnyc]

vocals are tinny, and way too much fx (reverb), and are too loud and dynamic.

I'd compress them a little and lay off the FX.

I'd re-record the vox too, there were several parts that seemed off-key.