Ex-Something, new tune

fritsthegirl

fritsthegirl

Taste of home
This song came out like a jumped up school yard chant. Ex refers to the fact that I play the E7 shape for the ENTIRE song and the 'something' is that I clearly don't have a clue.

I think my main objective was to get the timing and tracking better, hopefully there's an improvement in those two things at least. The singing is flat as a pancake in some parts, this is a bit harder to remedy. Anyways, I'm keen to hear what you think, I'm just glad this is public now, this tune has been doing my head in. Now it's your turn. :D

Thanks for listening.

OLD VOCALS:

NEW VOCALS
 
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The vocals seem to be a little unsure when they come in, like right at the beginning, izzat what you meant with the timing?

I do quite like the guitar tone you've got and the harmony between the tracks. Sounds pretty fleshed out even though it's only vocals and guitar. :D
 
Sax2 said:
The vocals seem to be a little unsure when they come in, like right at the beginning, izzat what you meant with the timing?

I do quite like the guitar tone you've got and the harmony between the tracks. Sounds pretty fleshed out even though it's only vocals and guitar. :D
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It wazznt exactly what I meant, but it doesn't matter, I agree with you. I didn't spend enough time sorting the opening out. Even with beer ears on, I can hear now that it lacks punch. I changed it a bit and updated the link. Thanks for the reply and fresh ears. :)
 
I think you need to bring those vocals up! I want to hear them and I really like the harmonies that come in, but I had trouble making out what was going on at times over the chorus-ey guitar. I'm not a huge fan of that effect myself, but I do think it makes a single guitar sound fuller sometimes and it's fine here, I just think it dominates a little too much.

I think your timing is fine, I like the melody a lot, and I liked what I caught of the lyrics and I loved the harmonies, I just think as it's presented now, it sounds kinda timid and unsure. How much of that is you being timid and unsure, vs. how much of it is the way you chose to mix it I can't tell, but I bet you can do more with these tracks to give them more presence and clarity :).
 
Your voice is like silk, and I'm so glad you didn't double-track it to death. I agree that the voclas can come up. Harmonies are really nice. I got no problem with the timing, but I think you need to remind yourself that you have a beautiful voice and sing like you know that. Your vocals are a little tentative. It's not a matter of changing your delivery physically, just mentally. If you approach your vocals with confidence, and even a little bit of arrogance, your true voice will really shine.

I love this.
 
My two cents is that it's not a timing issue, but rather an instrumentation and arrangement issue.

You've got a nice voice, but I find that the rawness [in a good way of course] of your voice is sort of undermined by the chorusy electric guitar. I think it would suit it better if it was an acoustic guitar.

Also I agree with what heatmeister and Rami both said. Maybe if you have a more confident attitude about your singing, your true voice will shine through you and you won't downplay it in the mix.
 
The intro is a little loose in the way the mono right suddenly turn to stereo. Are there three guitars going?

Agree with comments about the vocal delivery. The tone and the pitch sound good to me, you need to get that attitude in there, or is it soul? I forget. Like on the drinks part of the first soft drinks, it sounds like you were not sure of what was coming next, as an example.

I liked the sandy candy couplet and the way you pronounce Jill sounds like jell. So it took a few to realize this is about a Jack and Jill. It's really sweet in sentiment.

I thought the groove came thru nicely too.
 
heatmiser said:
I think you need to bring those vocals up! I want to hear them and I really like the harmonies that come in, but I had trouble making out what was going on at times over the chorus-ey guitar. I'm not a huge fan of that effect myself, but I do think it makes a single guitar sound fuller sometimes and it's fine here, I just think it dominates a little too much.

I think your timing is fine, I like the melody a lot, and I liked what I caught of the lyrics and I loved the harmonies, I just think as it's presented now, it sounds kinda timid and unsure. How much of that is you being timid and unsure, vs. how much of it is the way you chose to mix it I can't tell, but I bet you can do more with these tracks to give them more presence and clarity :).
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Thanks a lot Heat. RE the guitar, I didn't really fall in love with the sound either, and hearing what you said about it makes me dislike it a little more. I'm glad the back bone of the song is sounding OK to you though.

I really wanted to give up on this tune, I was getting so sick of hearing it. I think it's because I knew myself that a few things about it weren't quite right. I couldn't give up on it until it was complete enough to get it up here for some fresh ears and advice. I'm glad I persevered. I'm going to learn more on this song than any other I think, the idea seemed so simple but it's been a real monster to get right.
 
RAMI said:
Your voice is like silk, and I'm so glad you didn't double-track it to death. I agree that the voclas can come up. Harmonies are really nice. I got no problem with the timing, but I think you need to remind yourself that you have a beautiful voice and sing like you know that. Your vocals are a little tentative. It's not a matter of changing your delivery physically, just mentally. If you approach your vocals with confidence, and even a little bit of arrogance, your true voice will really shine.

I love this.
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I could read comments like this ALL day long, thanks Rami. I don't really believe it when people say that about my voice. I think it's well below average and I'm scared it can't handle it. So yeh, you're right, it's more my head than anything. :D I'm going to redo those vocals. I'm really glad you liked it otherwise.
 
SloppyJo said:
My two cents is that it's not a timing issue, but rather an instrumentation and arrangement issue.

You've got a nice voice, but I find that the rawness [in a good way of course] of your voice is sort of undermined by the chorusy electric guitar. I think it would suit it better if it was an acoustic guitar.

Also I agree with what heatmeister and Rami both said. Maybe if you have a more confident attitude about your singing, your true voice will shine through you and you won't downplay it in the mix.
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I value your two cents! I normally do play an acoustic but I bought this electric guitar right, and I HAD to use it. I'll get the acoustic out again and try something with that. I miss that simple bastard anyway.
 
Manslick said:
The intro is a little loose in the way the mono right suddenly turn to stereo. Are there three guitars going?

Agree with comments about the vocal delivery. The tone and the pitch sound good to me, you need to get that attitude in there, or is it soul? I forget. Like on the drinks part of the first soft drinks, it sounds like you were not sure of what was coming next, as an example.

I liked the sandy candy couplet and the way you pronounce Jill sounds like jell. So it took a few to realize this is about a Jack and Jill. It's really sweet in sentiment.

I thought the groove came thru nicely too.
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I'm always confusing people with my weird accent. I agree the intro is a bit random. I'm going to work a bit more on that. Thanks for the compliments on my voice, I'm definitely going to redo the vocals with a bit more soul & attitude. I'm pretty sure I got a bit of both lying around here somewhere!
 
The song and performance are gorgeous frits. I'm fine with the element of timidness in the vocals, it gives them an endearing quality that fints with the mood of the song.

Like Heat, I'm not a fan of chorus effects on guitars - I think it's an effect that's dated pretty badly and locks you into a certain era. That said, it isn't too overbearing here and does add to the C86 era flavour of the song.

The only other issue I had was that there's a fair amount of lip/mouth smacking noises bleeding in to the mix - I'm guessing you're miking it pretty close and possibly without a pop shield that may bring you in to closer proximity again. You could address that pretty easily and being slightly further away from the mic may force you to deliver a slightly more forceful delivery if you wanted to address the timidness.

It's very nice though.
 
Nice tune, the opening guitar panning is cool. Never mind the chorus haters, I personally like the effect. I do agree with the others that the vocals could be brought up a bit. What are your sonic goals for this song? Just guitar & vocals? or a full blown band with bass & drums? I could hear it going either direction.
 
robgreen said:
The song and performance are gorgeous frits. I'm fine with the element of timidness in the vocals, it gives them an endearing quality that fints with the mood of the song.

Like Heat, I'm not a fan of chorus effects on guitars - I think it's an effect that's dated pretty badly and locks you into a certain era. That said, it isn't too overbearing here and does add to the C86 era flavour of the song.

The only other issue I had was that there's a fair amount of lip/mouth smacking noises bleeding in to the mix - I'm guessing you're miking it pretty close and possibly without a pop shield that may bring you in to closer proximity again. You could address that pretty easily and being slightly further away from the mic may force you to deliver a slightly more forceful delivery if you wanted to address the timidness.

It's very nice though.
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Aww, thanks a lot Rob. :) I'll have a good listen for the mouth sounds when I redo the vocals, I didn't hear them but having just had another look at a tutorial on 'how to record vocals' there's still a few things I'm doing wrong.
 
fuzzsniffvoyage said:
Nice tune, the opening guitar panning is cool. Never mind the chorus haters, I personally like the effect. I do agree with the others that the vocals could be brought up a bit. What are your sonic goals for this song? Just guitar & vocals? or a full blown band with bass & drums? I could hear it going either direction.
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The chorus haters, LOL. :D Cheers man, I'm glad you liked it. I didn't have so many sonic goals for this song, rhythmically it was quite hard for me, so I focussed a LOT on getting that right. That's because I initially thought drums might be kind of cool, but when I was done with it, I wasn't sure it needed it...
 
I like the way you go from one side & flesh out the soundscape in the 1st bars.
Your voice is tentative but I think it suits the theme of the song. The level meeds to be evened out as the re are bits where the voice moves back too far - chorus aprticularly.
The guitars could use a little brightening with EQ.
Really nice piece - just needs some tweaking.
IF you get the time & moxy you should record another vocal with you singing more confidentally so that we can A B & hear what works best for the song.
I strong vocal pulled way back & to the side might be cool to accompany the chorus vocal you already have.
Cool stuff.
 
I'm pretty sure I used all of the advice given to me so far. Thanks to everyone, sooo...I hope you agree it sounds a bit better. I reckon it does. I think re-doing the vocals has taken away a bit of the annoyingness of the chorus guitar too. I've just got a wee bit of reverb and compression on the two vocal tracks, and a bit of pitch correction I guess on the lalala. Do you think that sounds all right?

What birate do you render mp3s at? Seems it's always loads quieter when I play the mp3 it through my laptop soundcard than it does thorugh my usb interface. I turned up the master volume on this one. I don't really know how to adjust to otherwise. Does it seem OK volume wise, I got no idea.

 
rayc said:
I like the way you go from one side & flesh out the soundscape in the 1st bars.
Your voice is tentative but I think it suits the theme of the song. The level meeds to be evened out as the re are bits where the voice moves back too far - chorus aprticularly.
The guitars could use a little brightening with EQ.
Really nice piece - just needs some tweaking.
IF you get the time & moxy you should record another vocal with you singing more confidentally so that we can A B & hear what works best for the song.
I strong vocal pulled way back & to the side might be cool to accompany the chorus vocal you already have.
Cool stuff.
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Thanks Ray, have done just that, hope you think it's better. I've only really done the vocals, but in doing that I felt everything found its place a bit better so I haven't made any other changes except to levels and a bit of panning. Maybe you still think I should tweak the guitars. Let me know.
 
I didn't like the first one, but I liked the second one. Says it all, really. If you cut some lower/lower mid frequencies from the guitars, it'll help the vocal stand out better.
 
Yes, v4 is better in my opinion. Especially in the chorus where I can hear all of the vocal parts more clearly. I don't hear it as being drastically different performance-wise (not that it necessarily should be), but there's better clarity for sure.

Did you double track the electric with two takes, each with a chorus effect on them? The stereo spread is more pronounced this time and the swirly nature of the chorus sounds maybe more pronounced to me as a result.

Just curious, are you thinking down the road of producing full mixes with percussion and bass guitar and more stuff generally, or are you more interested in keeping it to sort of singer/songwriter type arrangements? I can easily hear this as being part of something bigger and more produced myself. Cool.
 
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