Would love feedback on my first original song!

You have a good voice. You started to lose me with all the effects on the vocals--the obvious pitch shifting especially. I liked the understated arrangement and the fact that you left the dynamics more or less intact rather than compressing it to death and then boosting everything. I think you might work on stronger hooks. A minute after the song ended, I'd pretty much forgotten how it went. Something should stick in my mind and make me want to listen again.

It isn't bad. Just seems to me that you are trying to sound like everything you are hearing in contemporary R&B, where oversinging, pitch shifting, and keyboard-driven arrangements with few if any real instruments are the norm. I'd so much rather listen to you finding your own voice and style.

That's all I've got.
 
Robus said:
You have a good voice. You started to lose me with all the effects on the vocals--the obvious pitch shifting especially. I liked the understated arrangement and the fact that you left the dynamics more or less intact rather than compressing it to death and then boosting everything. I think you might work on stronger hooks. A minute after the song ended, I'd pretty much forgotten how it went. Something should stick in my mind and make me want to listen again.

It isn't bad. Just seems to me that you are trying to sound like everything you are hearing in contemporary R&B, where oversinging, pitch shifting, and keyboard-driven arrangements with few if any real instruments are the norm. I'd so much rather listen to you finding your own voice and style.

That's all I've got.
Click to expand...

Great advice, thanks so much! Got to be honest though, the only effects I used were reverb and echo (maybe too much of those haha), but no pitch shifting or autotune. That's actually one of the things I like most about my voice... the ability to do melismas and quickly change pitch. But thanks for the tips on the songwriting itself!
 
Really like the song- great lyrics. I think a stronger bass or drum component during the hook would be helpful in making it more "catchy." The creativity of this jam is fantastic.
 
Your voice sounds heavily autotuned. It was hard to get past that and listen to the rest... :/
 
That's great for your first song, good work! Personally I really dislike the auto tune sound and find it confusing why a singer would want to copy that with their natural voice. Auto tune is a fad nowadays, way over used, everyone doing it, but don't confuse that sound with melisma. It just sounds like using electronics to hide serious pitch problems.

But that said, I think you've made a really nice start! Keep going!

I like your voice. I really liked the snippets of harmony and would encourage you to do more with that. It sounds like you're developing a taste for for tight harmonies and picking out those moments for dissonance in harmony that you can use to create emotion and pull the listener in.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top