Suicide suite

Ardeus

New member
Hi everyone.

I would like to have some feedback on the songs, although, if you're feeling a bit down, pass along :)

I guess that the songs are not easy listening, both lyrics and music. The easiest one may be "Was that a smile?", a song about someone who's trying to persuade a person not to jump off a bridge.



Here's the link to the 6 songs:



Finally, here's a 360º video for the 1st track. It works better on phones and tablets (using your YouTube player) because you just have to turn the phone around to control where you want to point the camera.



On a PC, you can control it with the keyboard (keys: W A S D) or with the button at the top left corner.
 
IMO, the mix is great, I've only listened to "Was That A Smile"...and better yet, it is not LOUD as hell, which its perfect for piano songs.
 
Very Interesting song. I do like it. Might want to roll off the sub-bass frequencies on the vocal. I heard a really hard "p-pop" at the beginning. Also heard what sounded like a paper flip in there. cool song. Kudos
 
Obrigado CMolena.

The 5th song suffers from that problem. I already corrected it, but I haven't replaced the song on soundcloud.
 
I listened to the first song "Was that a smile". Neat concept, arrangement, and piano backing track. I would work on the vocal though - it's off-pitch in places, and I agree that some of the bass could be rolled off. Right now it feels sort of like you are speaking right into my ear, rather than being in the same space as the piano. Cool song though.
 
Thanks for the comments, I'm going to cut the bass in the voice. I listened again and the piano and the voice don't seem connected.

I recorded the voice in the morning and sang very close to the mic. I messed around with the EQ but I ended up not making any changes.

I don't have a very good ear for pitch, I think I would need singing lessons. If I ever perform this live, I will have to do it.

On the 3rd song "Passing trees", about a man who set himself on fire inside a train in Japan, while I was singing " And I feel like I'm the happiest man on Eaaaaaaaarth" I noticed I was extremely off key, so I decided to make it even worse :) But it works for me there, it makes it extremely uncomfortable to hear, like there's a sickness to that hapiness.
 
"Was that a smile?" has 3 tracks:

- Main piano - I didn't do anything to this track
- Final distante pian - Just lowered the volume and added reverb to make it seem distant
- Voice - Compression and reverb.

I tried to cut the bass on the voice, but as soon as it becomes noticeable that there's less bass, the voice starts to sound more artificial.

I recorded my voice with this:

51H1McUrP8L._SX355_.jpg

I used a dead cat because I lost my pop killer... and the noises you hear in the background from time to time is mostly my dog :)

If someone could give me a hand with this, it would be great.

https://onedrive.live.com/redir?resid=6F319019DB910B3F!137&authkey=!ADaoJXbxOX46Zd8&ithint=file%2czip
 
I remixed the whole thing cutting the bass on the vocals and updated the songs on soundcloud. All songs sound better, so thanks guys! All songs with exception of "Was that a smile?"...
 
Track 1 - starts off like the mellow version of Mad World.
The vocals are the weak link - there's a fair chuck of proximity effect I think and the enunciation as well as pronounciation also make it less easily comprehended.
The sustain pedal gets a workout. You'd get better use from some properly prepared drone notes.
 
I thought the mood setting was very effective. Very good on that.

The piano had a bit of a cheap sound, but it worked OK in this type of song.

But something about the vocal and piano together that isn't working. I would probably back off of the reverb on the vocal to start. I would probably remove some of the low end of the vocal. There are some pitch issues as well.
 
I hadn't seen the video of Mad World. Great concept and execution.

I hear what you say about the proximity effect and I wanted the vocals to seem very close to the ear most of the time, that's the reason I sang very close to the mic. But I notice now that the voice and piano seem to be on different planes.

I don't like the sound of the piano on the 5th song "Leather and cork", it sounds very artificial. I am going to try to record it again with lower volume and see if it gets better.

Other than that, I have no problem with the piano, maybe because I'm used to the sound of the synth (it's a korg karma).

I tried cutting the bass on the voice, but it sounds really bad. Right now I have no EQ on the voice, just compression and reverb.

I am going check each song and to try to cut the reverb and see how it works, but I'm guessing the problem you hear is both in the mic and the voice itself :)

Concerning pitch and pronounciation, I guess there's not much I can do at the moment. It would take me a long time to be able to improve those things and if I focused on that, the interpretation would suffer.

If someone could grab the tracks for the 6th song I posted here on the 1st page and give them a try, so I can have a better idea of how it should sound, it would help a lot.
 
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