Metal Song with Brutal and Melodic Vocals - Need Feedback on this

It's definitely already at demo quality.

I think that the guitars are too silent. The song seems to be drums and vocals with "some guitars on the side".
I also couldn't make out a bass at all.
 
It's different for sure, not a bad thing, but most definitely not brutal at all. It's demo quality already.

The brootal vocals are horrible, although they might be usable. That weird effect is screwing it up and they are too loud. Not knocking it, but if I wanted to hear music with vocals like that, this would not be it LOL. It's too happy :D
 
The bass sounds a lot better now. I can hear the attack. You've got to remember that all sounds have an "envelope" that goes attack->decay->sustain->release. If there is no attack, our brain has a problem making sense of the following sound. In the same regard, you can make an attack very prominent and leave the rest of the note rather silent and our brain will be able to pick up on the sound.

I think that the tone of the rhythm guitars is just too tame in general. They aren't very strongly distorted and don't seem to have much low end power to them. I don't know if anything bar a re-record could make them truly heavy.
And they could still be louder IMO.



I really like the melodic vocal on the chorus. Great singing.
 
FoulPhil wrote "It's different for sure, not a bad thing, but most definitely not brutal at all. It's demo quality already.
The brootal vocals are horrible, although they might be usable. That weird effect is screwing it up and they are too loud. Not knocking it, but if I wanted to hear music with vocals like that, this would not be it LOL. It's too happy"

I tried ---- I Really tried to post up a description of what I thought would be general description of what I was going for, but I fell into the blogosphere trap of describing myself as "_______" Metal, and having people tell me I'm not, and that this is "horrible" and "LOL" at this or that. Come on Phil, you're better than that - you're on a website where peer-pressure driven genre pissing contests are less important then the helping someone out.

Anyway, I'm trying to go for more of a "DeathStars" or "Lordi" sound, then "All Shall Perish" (ASP one of my favs, though)

I'm working on getting the vocals to sit better, and a better bass sound as well

Going for a sound something like this, but with a different look and lyrics
DeathStars - Metal - WiTH LyRiCS - YouTube
 
Crazy Luke said:
FoulPhil wrote "It's different for sure, not a bad thing, but most definitely not brutal at all. It's demo quality already.
The brootal vocals are horrible, although they might be usable. That weird effect is screwing it up and they are too loud. Not knocking it, but if I wanted to hear music with vocals like that, this would not be it LOL. It's too happy"

I tried ---- I Really tried to post up a description of what I thought would be general description of what I was going for, but I fell into the blogosphere trap of describing myself as "_______" Metal, and having people tell me I'm not, and that this is "horrible" and "LOL" at this or that. Come on Phil, you're better than that - you're on a website where peer-pressure driven genre pissing contests are less important then the helping someone out.

Anyway, I'm trying to go for more of a "DeathStars" or "Lordi" sound, then "All Shall Perish" (ASP one of my favs, though)

I'm working on getting the vocals to sit better, and a better bass sound as well

Going for a sound something like this, but with a different look and lyrics
DeathStars - Metal - WiTH LyRiCS - YouTube
Click to expand...

I gave you key information that you need to make it sound better. What more could you ask for? I even went through the trouble of complimenting it so that I didn't sound too insulting. There is no room for butt hurt man. I've had the nastiest comments you could imagine about my own music and I never once took it to heart because I know not everyone will like it. Not everyone one is support to like it. We all have different tastes. So, take it with a grain of salt and keep experimenting until you get it sounding bad ass :thumbs up:
 
I'm not easily but hurt, But I'm making a statement for the whole forum that I think terms like "horrible" and "awful" could be replaced with "not good as it sits right now," etc. Our songs our like our kids, and you wouldn't want your son's BBall couch telling you he's awful.
Anyway, just graduated from an Audio Engineering course, so it might take me awhile to get up to speed with others in the forum - and coming up with the cash for better plugins
 
Crazy Luke said:
I'm not easily but hurt, But I'm making a statement for the whole forum that I think terms like "horrible" and "awful" could be replaced with "not good as it sits right now," etc. Our songs our like our kids, and you wouldn't want your son's BBall couch telling you he's awful.
Anyway, just graduated from an Audio Engineering course, so it might take me awhile to get up to speed with others in the forum - and coming up with the cash for better plugins
Click to expand...

Yeah well I'm not in this world to walk on egg shells. The fact that you choose to read it as an insult is not my problem. I said It sounds horrible yes, but because it's too loud and has that weird effect. You're just being a baby man. That simple. I had someone tell me my music is shit horrible and that I shouldn't even be trying to make music because it's that awful. My reply to the person was that it's just a hobby for me and I do it because it's fun. You're in the wrong forum if you want people to lie to you and tell you it's good so it doesn't hurt your feelings. Ask your friends and family for advice if you want people to lie to you. :facepalm:
 
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Crazy Luke said:
I'm not easily but hurt, But I'm making a statement for the whole forum that I think terms like "horrible" and "awful" could be replaced with "not good as it sits right now," etc. Our songs our like our kids, and you wouldn't want your son's BBall couch telling you he's awful.
Anyway, just graduated from an Audio Engineering course, so it might take me awhile to get up to speed with others in the forum - and coming up with the cash for better plugins
Click to expand...

I can understand that you are used to readind and hearing everything in a "hedged" manner, because that's how people nowadays grow up.

The problem with this is that we're on the internet, I don't know you, you're not my kid and I'm not your BBall coach. You're placing your song in a public forum and asking for critique on it and you're going to hear criticism about it exactly what we hear.
The other option would be to go "Thumbs up, man!" and let each live in delusion. I don't come here to hear how great my mixes are, because that's what I'm already thinking when I create them, I'm hear for somebody to tell me what sounds flawed. Your emotional attachment will always make you overappreciate your own creations and cause butthurt when others disagree.
It's nothing personal.
 
FoulPhil said:
my music is shit horrible
Click to expand...
Your best songs are all specifically about shit. :D

Yeah, a lot of people will try to wrap feedback in compliments to soften the blow, but some people won't. Really, there are enough songs posted on this forum that no one is going to give you any feedback unless they think there's something there to salvage. If Phil really thought your song was without merit, he wouldn't have bothered commenting.

So as the vocals themselves. They really aren't brutal by modern standards. They sound like a NWoBHM band trying to sound brutal without applying any of the techniques that we've learned about that sort of production in the last several decades. If you want brutal, you've got to look into the death metal world.
 
Crazy Luke said:
FoulPhil wrote "It's different for sure, not a bad thing, but most definitely not brutal at all. It's demo quality already.
The brootal vocals are horrible, although they might be usable. That weird effect is screwing it up and they are too loud. Not knocking it, but if I wanted to hear music with vocals like that, this would not be it LOL. It's too happy"

I tried ---- I Really tried to post up a description of what I thought would be general description of what I was going for, but I fell into the blogosphere trap of describing myself as "_______" Metal, and having people tell me I'm not, and that this is "horrible" and "LOL" at this or that. Come on Phil, you're better than that - you're on a website where peer-pressure driven genre pissing contests are less important then the helping someone out.

Anyway, I'm trying to go for more of a "DeathStars" or "Lordi" sound, then "All Shall Perish" (ASP one of my favs, though)

I'm working on getting the vocals to sit better, and a better bass sound as well

Going for a sound something like this, but with a different look and lyrics
DeathStars - Metal - WiTH LyRiCS - YouTube
Click to expand...

I couldn't gt the whole thing to play. I'm having weird internet issues today. Anyway, from what I head, it sounds 100% fake and plasticky. Overcooked. I suspect sims, drum samples, all fake, and it sounds that way. I understand that not everyone can blast real amps and bash real drums, and I know that not everyone can afford real gear that's worth recording, so it's your job to make them not sound so fake if you want to sound good. Mellow it out some. Humanize those ridiculous typewriter drum tracks. I know the Hot Topic mall-metal heroes of today all record that way, sims, samples, heavy editing, quantize everything, but they're doing it in real studios with big budgets. Their fake garbage doesn't sound that fake.

As for the critiques, man up. One of the few redeeming qualities left at this site is the honesty of the MP3 clinic. Don't worry about posting descriptions. Just post the song. Two things can happen when you try to describe your stuff....1) you'll potentially keep people away, like me, because I personally hate the sterile contrived garbage that passes for "brutal metal" these days, or 2) you'll attract people that are into your style of music and that can end badly if it's not up to snuff.
 
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