The Dreaming...and the Damage Done

Stevie_M

Member


Breakbeat acoustic ballad off my new solo project. I think it sounds pretty good, but maybe I'm just crazy? I am in dire need of reassurance and/or critique. I've listened to my tracks so much now that I'm naturally adapted to them, so I want to try them on some fresh ears.

Specifically, I'd like to hear opinions of my track based on these two points:

1. How it sounds from an emotional perspective. Barring any technical/production impurities, does the track have soul? Does it move you? Is it unique/interesting? How does it sound from the perspective of the AVERAGE listener?

2. How it sounds from a professional/commercial standpoint. Quality of the recording and the mix.

Thanks so much guys!
 
Hey, just had a quick listen to your song, and it sounded pretty good, but maybe i'm just crazy too.

In terms of emotion and soul, it's there, sort of a wistful, yearning, melancholic thing. I wouldn't say entirely unique, there's some pretty familiar sounds, harmonies and structure, but it suits the style and mood, there are some nice melodic elements that keep it interesting. The drums are a bit monotonous at times, maybe a few fills/breaks during some of the transitions would break it up a bit but i still like them, it's always a bit of a gamble getting electronic drum sounds to work in a mix with acoustic instruments. I would think a solid bass instrument part would carry the whole thing a bit better rythymically, arrangement wise that is one thing that struck me. I thought heard a bass guitar in there at some points and wanted to hear more.

From the technical side, i don't think this would compare to a lot of current 'commercial' releases. Not in a negative way, it just doesn't sound current. There is a lot of reverb/delay phasing going on - at some points early on the vocal sounds very phasey becoming a bit 'warbly', tape fluttery almost. Also at points, i think in the vocal there is an obvious noisy hiss which is accentuated by some of the effects, not overpowering but noticeable. But i like the effects and the rawness of it, suits the song. The balance of the instruments sounds ok to me, although i would bring the bass up and maybe some of the electric guitar embellishments. Again, genre and mix wise i wouldn't compare this to a commercial release, more a low-fi, psychedelic post-rock thing (LOL @ genre confusion), and i think you nailed that fine. All just my opinion, and i'm just a noob here anyway, so take it all with a truckload of salt :) Having said all that, i like it, i don't think you are wasting your time. thanks for the listen.
 
Some interesting chord progressions. The bass is weak and comes in very late. Like the guitar part in the left speaker, but less reverb...bring it out. Vocal is interesting, but too much FX...back up a little. Your bass drum sound needs punch. It just kind of sits there and doesn't even try to play with the sub. Like the slow build through the acoustic break at the end. Again, heavy on the phaser. The vocal phrasing around 1:02 is awkward. There are a lot of rasping string noises from the acoustic (especially when they ping-pong) that need to be cut out of the mix a bit.
All-in-all, very Pink Floyd-esque. Got a nice play to it. If you're looking to copy the 80's Pink Floyd sound and not aim for 2010 commercial, you're well on your way. As far as current commercial, you may be heading the wrong way.
Sounds clear, yet surreal. Being a PF fan, I really like it.
 
Well those that already commented have pretty much said that the emotion of the song is fine......in so much as you realize it's a sort of melancholy piece. It's not that melancholy is outdated but the delivery / song style you chose might be. The string noise from left to right is disconcerting. Maybe it's me but the string noise itself does not move back and forth. The drums are a bit on the clinical side. Can you program a little more life into them? Not much......but some changes to fit the song. The vocal sits in the mix ok but is too low and has too much of the wrong type of reverb on it. Dial the reverb back back some to start with and then experiment with a different type of reverb. Have you thought about some simple tasteful harmonies to some of the lines? I think that might help your sound and update the song as well. Don't overdo it.........just add some higher harmony and see if you like it. The bass is hardly there. Is it in or is it out???
 
Thanks all for the comments so far!

Anders - I'm glad you get it as the cross-genre track it is. "Lo fi phsycadelic post rock", haha I love it!

Broken - Actually there is no bass on this track at all. I wanted to keep it relatively bare and stripped down. I too am a massive Pink Floyd fan, and I actually am surprised how many Floyd-like reviews I've been getting. I somehow subconsciously sang and processed my vocal in a very Gilmoury, Wall-era kind of way. I think modern music needs more Pink Floyd-esque vibes! Who's with me?

Mickster - I'm glad you understand the melancholy vibe of the song. Copy all about the string noise. I can't really eliminate in post-production, and I feel like the string noise sort of adds to the rawness of the instrumental...but maybe I'm just rationalizing! I tried with the harmonies but I just can't like them. They detract from the isolated, shoegazing vibe I love about the track. And no bass. I want this to be a pretty minimalist piece.

Please keep the reviews coming! Curious to know how this sounds to you all.

LYRICS:
----------------------
Hold my hand to the fire
If you think I'm a liar

Hold my hand to your heart
If you want it to start

Never let anyone else decide for you
Never let anything else decide what you should do

I don't wanna change your mind

I just wanna give you time

I just wanna hold you ya know it baby
Hold you ya know!

[Verse 2]
Hold my hand to the fire
If you think I'm a liar

Hold my hand to your heart
If you want it to start

Always gonna try to find the time for you
Always gonna do whatever you want me too

You can always change your mind

You can always take your time

You can always hold me you know that baby
Hold me ya know!
 
I would echo that the emotion is good, but that the drums and the vocal effects are the two big detractors for me. I would love the bass drum to be lower, and a good snare would work wonders for you. With the vocal effects, I love Pink Floyd as much as the next guy, maybe more, but I think you could back off the reverb just a little bit. The guitars fit very nicely and the vocal has a nice space in the mix to sit in. Overall very good.
 
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