Yeah those high hats call too much attention to themselves. I think the arrangement is good but am I hearing some wrong notes on the keyboard? I think you also need to re-sing the lead vocal with more abandon. Also a few pitch problem in the lead vocals. I think the harmonies are good though.
Ooh, I really like the end. That would be hilarious if you left it like that. At any rate, the song needs to get wrapped up quickly in my opinion, since it's pushing 4 minutes at that point. So I guess you're maybe just a line or two short. Cool song!